Flower of Debt

Flower of debt

By: Michael Mac Gowan

Aaron Graham stood looking through the florists window, the shop was full of all color and size making it look like a rainbow room. Aaron had won 20 thousand dollars just a week ago and had not been able to tell his girlfriend Sara, she is the love of his life and he wanted to tell her of his winnings and the options they would be able to move out of their dingy apartment and into somewhere much nicer even possibly a house.

Aaron walked into the brightly lit store and pointed at a bouquet of white Daffodils “ how much for these Sir ?” The tall old man turned to Aaron after pulling some dead buds from another set of flowers, “The Daffodils are 40$ plus tax and for an extra ten I can give them a nice rapping to make them look more gift like”, “Yeah that sounds Great” Aaron said with a smile, the old man smiled back and began picking the flower.

Aaron looked at the brown paper bag he had on him, pulled the wine out and gave it another look over. It had cost him a bit more than he was accustomed to but knew it would be worth it. Aaron had started to feel a bit grim, yes he thought he would get to tell her about the win and the money but he would also have to tell her how he had won the money and she would not take it well.

“Here you are Sir” Aaron looked up from the bottle and saw the old man holding the nicely decorated Daffodils in his hand “they look amazing thank you so much.” Aaron looked at the man’s name tag “Steve”,“not a problem, sure have a lovely day” Aaron walked out of the store and back on the cold street.

Aaron had flowers in one hand and wine in the other, he could see the incredible future he and Sara would have and it all starts tonight.

Aaron had finally gotten home after almost an hour of commuting. He walked into his red brick apartment building and ran up the first flight of stairs, made a quick right and there it was, apartment 102, not much but Aaron and Sara had called it home for almost three years. Aaron had grown to love the place but knew Sara deserved more.

Aaron walked straight to the small kitchen and put the bottle of wine and flowers on the cabinet and opened the fridge to pour himself a beer before starting dinner.

The cold beer had gone down great after Aaron’s long day of traveling the city, but just like the beer the sun was also going down and Sara would return soon, time to get to work.

The homemade pasta was ready and the tomato sauce was on a simmer when Aaron decided it was time for a shower, he walked out of the small kitchen through the even smaller hallway and turned the light on in the washroom. Aaron looked into the sink and saw Jaffar his cat asleep. He shook his head and laughed “haha Jaffar wake up”. “Meow” the cat spouted out and Aaron picked him up and placed him on the carpet of the hallway closing the door.

Aaron trimmed and cleaned his scraggly beard and gave his long hair a much needed wash. He stepped out of the shower and walked out of the washroom holding a towel around his waist.

Jaffar padded along behind him to his room. The room was covered in his and Sara’s clothes, an unmade bed stood in the corner . He walked across the room and looked into the closet to find something a bit nicer than his regular indie band tee shirts. This should do he thought and put on a long sleeve button up and a pair of blue jeans.

Aaron heard the door close “hey, You home Aaron?”, “yeahh just in the bedroom” he shouted as he did the last button up.

“What’s this? Did you make dinner?” Aaron walked out of his room and down the dark narrow hallway before responding. “I thought because I had the day off and you have been working so hard at the hospital I could make you a little something.” Aaron gave her a hug from behind and as she tasted the sauce, she turned around in the hug and squeezed him back. “ Well it's very good, I see you also cleaned your beard” she kissed him on the cheek and he kissed her back then rotated into her hug.

“Jafar” Sara smiled and picked the little black cat up from the cold porcelain floor, hugging it like a child getting his/her first pet. Sara walked out of the kitchen with Jafar, she was wearing her blue scrubs and had her black hair tied in a bun. “ I'll be right back. I need to change” she said over her shoulder. “ok hun” He replied with anticipation. Aaron looked over and saw the flowers, maybe she didn’t notice he thought as he pulled out plates and dumped the pasta out of the strainer.

He made both his and her plates, brought them to the living room and placed them on the little wooden table with a small single candle.

She walked out of the dark hallway and into the living room. The light of the room felt natural, it was that of a single candle and the moon streaming in from one of the open windows. She stepped on to the old wooden floor dressed in track pants and a hoodie, “Beautiful” Aaron said and she sat on the other side of the wooden table.

Aaron got up and walked into the kitchen, grabbed the flowers, wine and two plastic wine glasses. “ So I kinda splurged today but but I really want to get you something.” Sara put her fork down as he passed her the flowers and she opened the top of the rapping. “ ohh their so pretty” she looked up and smiled’ “would you like a glass of wine” he asked. “Yes please” she responded. Aaron poured her a glass and took his seat .

When Aaron and Sara had finished their meal he decided it was time to tell her “Oh.. I have some big news Sara, I won 20 grand last week and have not been able to tell you until know”, Sara’s dark complexion became red tears silently rolling down her face.

“ We can move honey, we can go anywhere and we will have savings. We can probably buy a house.” Aaron smiled as he got up to hold Sara. “ You said you won the money ?” Sara tried to hold her tears as she spoke “are you gambling again, after all the lows you have hit?, don’t answer that, I found your little black info book”.

Sara placed a little book on the table and Aaron stepped back, dropping to his knees, “Sara I am so sorry, I slipped, I didn’t mean to, it just kind of happened”.

“You slipped up, that's what you think this is just a small slip up? Aaron, we have been working for years to stop your gambling and just like that you are on the bandwagon, how can I trust you? How can I know if you are lying to me?”

Sara’s voice had gotten hard and firm. She was holding back more tears but needed him to know that this could be the end of them.

Aaron stood up and grabbed the book with anger and threw it at one of the brick walls, “I know this is not just some small thing I can sweep under the rug, but I do know I can bet it, Gambling does not own my life, I own my life”.

“I want to believe you , but how can I?” Sara got off the wooden chair and walked past Aaron and back down the dark still Hallway and shut their bedroom door behind her.

Aaron sweating and with a beat red face sat down in his wooden chair and poured a glass of red wine. This isn’t how it’s supposed to go, he thought, taking a sip of his drink, he slumped down and held his head in one hand and began to think.

Time had passed slowly as he thought but he had come up with something he truly believed could tell her he was done and that he loves her more than gambling or anything else. He raced to grab his coat and her jacket and grabbed the little black book off the ground, shoving it in his pocket then heading down the hall to the bed room.

He opened the door very gently and whispered “Sara”, “Sara are you awake?”

“Yes, I’m awake” she muttered in a tired and angry voice. “I know you are pissed and I know you have no reason to but will you trust me and come for a walk”.

“A walk, this late?”

“I promise the walk will be worth it”. The room had grown silent, until Sara pulled the blankets off of her body and stepped out of bed, “ok let’s go” she grabbed the jacket from his hands and walked passed him towards the door.

Aaron and Sara had walked down this street hundreds of times before. “So what are we doing out here anyways?” she finally asked.

“I just want to show you something, come this way” He took a right turn, the same way he had made his way home early that day, this time the streets are empty and only the street lights keep the hazy brightness of the street alive.

Here he said and pointed to a fire lit in an old dumpster, “this is what you wanted to show me? I’m going home”.

Wait Wait just come with me take three more steps with me. Under Sara’s better judgment and still irritable feeling she did. The dumpster was hot even for a moderate distance and had no one hanging around it.

“So what is it?” she asked as Aaron pulled the black book out of his pocket and looked deep into her brown eyes. “never again” he says as he tosses the book into the fire. The flame grew bright, sparks flickering out into the night sky.

“Let’s only look forward and never look back” Sara began to cry as she saw the man she loves finally let go of his demons.

“ I don't forgive you and it will be hard for me to not be mad at you but I still love you and I do believe you will get past this and I will be there when you do. Sara reached out to grab Aarons hand, giving it a squeeze for comfort.

Sara and Aaron looked deep into the fire and knew that the past was finally behind them.