Dream within a dream within.

I had a dream in a dream.

First dream was spooky, but not terrible.

There was this terrible thunderstorm that caused us to close all the windows and doors. Because “I ain’t paying for the damn rental deposit.”

As if that would stop the wind from causing damage. But it’s my dream so...

I go to sleep to while watching some game. Basketball I believe.

And this is when I had a weird dream inside of my...dream.

Some dead guy with undead eyes And a bunch of other crap. I eventually wake up to a terribly drunk Tina and my exs....girlfriend taking about the game.

I ask them the score and I guess their team had won. But I was still out of it so I didn’t care as much as they had.

They asked me for a Dr Pepper, I oblige.

They leave.

The Cats are chasing a fly that’s being obnoxious.

It just won’t seem to die already.

I watch them pounce over the dresser and chairs, whatnot

And eventually I fall back to sleep.

Another spooky dream within my dream again so I become conscious in this dream.

I try whistling

Asking myself,

“ hey you wake yet??”

Face smacks

And I finally wake up back to the first layer of the dream.

I go to a kitchen and hear scratching at the door.

Peering out, the storms still raging on and I let in a black cat with a white neck that I’ve seen before.

It’s friendly.

It’s not my cat.

But I feed it regardless

He seems incredibly grateful.

Blissful purrs and leg rubs.

The dream switches here

I’m in some place, trying to find out who I am. Like some kinda hypno session, I’m definitely unresponsive to outward stimuli.

The sessions being guided by a mysterious man, mainly shrouded in shadows.

He wore an emerald rind on stocky but delicate fingers

I learn quite a bit about the strength of the human spirit from what he told me. And how mine was fucking...weird. Off the charts powerful.

“How could you not have noticed?” he asked

The guy was excited to talk about it.

An aura around me or some other gibberish.

We chat like this for a short while but then I wake up in the drivers seat of my car. It’s dusk and the engines off. I don’t remember how I got here but I’m sitting across from some guy who starts tripping.

I Ask if he was okay. Like I was genuinely concerned cause dude was tweaking.

Guy says “Yea, I’m okay. I’m trippin off pcp”

He leans out the window.

I say to him “Yea, no, player. You need to get out.”

He does and I realize there’s tons of people outside but we’re in some underground parking lot.

A guys In my back seat smoking a joint but seems chill.

“Wtf? Who are you? “

He doesn’t answer that, but when I ask if his shit was laced he tells me no. He’s just chillin.

So I drive us off and he’s laughing cause I just kidnapped him basically. Driving up the ramps and back toward a city I’m slightly familiar with from other dreams.

There’s a bus station with a booth to pay for tickets. The ladies in the booth recognize me as I drive by. I wave and move on. In the other dreams, I had to take the bus.

I Drop my passenger off at a place he felt comfortable And then I drive back home.

It’s pitch black outside beside a glaringly bright street lamp and there’s an ambulance parked in the yard

Suddenly I’m wide eyed and scared.

Rushing out of the car without closing the door behind me.

Jumping over a garden hose and up the few stairs in a single bound.

I barge indoors. The doors unlocked.

I’m thinking to myself

“No. Please, Not again. How long have you been like this? Are you okay Please dammit tell me she’s okay. “

I make it to a densely crowded room. Walking cautiously forward.

There’s Blood everywhere. Everywhere! The floor, ceiling, walls.

What’s happening?

You’re hooked up to several different machines and IV drips.

You’re barely breathing and docs/nurses keep prodding at you.

but you’re alive. Thank goodness you’re alive.

I made it just in time!

but I still feel guilty that I left without wondering if you needed me.

But how would i have known? You were so mad at me

I push through emergency crew and over to where you were in the bed. Covered in blood.

My sweetheart. My poor baby.

I stand next to you trying to hide my tears.

You sit up in bed and address everyone in the room but me.

That stung a little but I brush it off. Please just hear me out.

I try to apologize but you ignore me. Rather asking everyone in the room “Who are my actual friends”.

Despite the circumstances, it’s so good to hear your voice.

Everybody says they are. They’re definitely your friend. No doubt.

They’d tell you anything they think you want to hear.

But two people also explain how you’d been making them feel lately. One of those people were me.

First person said from the crowd “You always ask stuff from me and aren’t willing to return the need when it’s my turn to ask.”

The crowd murmurs, mockingly

I speak to you, turning away in what feels like shame, “I’m feeling like I’ve been taking care of your needs when you need it. While lately I haven’t been taking time to also tend to my needs. That’s why I wasn’t here tonight. I’m so sorry or else I’d have prevented all this. ”

Does that make me selfish?

I choke back a miserable feeling hiding my face in the palm of my hand.

And then you changed. I looked at you and your body had started to dissolve or some shit.

The lights panned out until only you and I were illuminated. The crowd turning into silhouettes in the background of the dream.

Your brain was floating in mid air. Your intestines, stomach, liver, heart, kidneys, veins, nervous system, the room was red with blood.

You were quite literally ‘wide open’.

The most vulnerable you could be.

Everybody in the room gasped in horror, disgusted. Uncomfortable.

Except for myself.

The most overwhelmingly powerful feeling of love washed over me.

I walked closer to you and embraced your big ass brain. “Where’d your body go, love?” Held you to my chest. Blood seeping into the shirt and jacket that I wear. I kissed your eyeball and listened to you cry.

You apologized and said you were trying so so hard but all the demands in life were too much and it was difficult to keep it together.

You’re bawling.

And my hearts breaking for you

I caress you....slimily. Holding you as tight as you’d allow. If I could squeeze the pain out of you then I would.

I told you, I know it’s tough. But you definitely have us. You’d been trying to keep a brave look and you’re breaking down inside. It’s okay to call on me in these times you know I don’t mind taking the load off you, I just need you to be real with me.

I felt to myself that it’s also okay for me to take care of my stuff with out feeling guilty.

The dream fades out and I’m crying along with you. And everybody else is tearing up.

And I wake up from the dream layers completely.

Perhaps this is another part of our closure. As strange of a dream it was.