Did I Fail or Not?

Forget it! All of it!

I was only trying as hard as I could to not be on the receiving end of anyone’s sharp end!!! This is just my way of being tactical in such a vile globe!!!!!

I’m weird, I’m a crybaby, heck! I’m even a bit of a special ed, completely honest! I freaking know it already! I don’t gotta constantly hear it outta you! I’VE. GOT. ISSUES!!!!!! Alrighty I said it!

You always tell me to fight back and don’t be a punk! Even if I retaliate; be it using weapons or bare hands, I still wouldn’t win in the end anyway, as the real ending this Universe has always got in store for us is meeting our inevitable fate (due to natural causes)! Especially the legends who wanted a positive change! I didn’t obtain telepathic abilities of any sort to freaking read minds to predict on what anyone’s next move’ll be. It don’t matter anyway, we’re all gonna lose!

I no longer have any patience left for anything including myself now, all because of the stupid stuff I did in the past!! I was little okay?! Though I still regret things, and will constantly make mistakes, and still impose self-criticism upon every one I make.

You always had a way of makin’ me feel like this. I failed, I’m defeated, bested all around!!! But what can I do? I was born this way!!! Or maybe not??? I can manage to harbor some good knowledge about what I’ve learned in past tense. But it don’t exactly mean I’ll end up obtaining secrets to the freaking Universe! Everything gonna constantly change is the prime information we all grow up to realize.

I need help!!!

That’s if I can even brave it from anyone else now!! I’d rather stay in my cartoonish mentality, as a result to you throwing in your brutal two cents!

Do you want me to be sorry?

Did you want me to be unborn?

Do you want me to die ashamed later on in life?

Should I lie about this or tell the freaking truth!?!?!

To tell you the truth, I don’t think it’ll make a dang difference.

I’ve seen everything on the news from natural disasters to murders like shoot-outs and bombing. This is who we are. We were like this many years before I got here too. War zones are all around us when you really it a close inspection, be it physically, psychologically, emotionally, direct or even indirect fighting.

Sometimes it’s a result of not getting the amount of control we think we deserve to have. But here’s the fact, we desire the type of authority or control to remove the obstacles that made us struggle to be at the top of our game.

I see it, sometimes.

If I get to the top of the pyramid, people will aim for me.

When I’m at the bottom it’s the same dang thing, only to prevent me from going up though. Nothing changes. Am I already dead? Or is it gonna catch me? Death I mean, will it catch me? The answer’s anonymous, just like how it can occur at anyplace and anybody.

Did I fail or not getting this message across to you? I probably missed something sue me. At least I got it all out… maybe. I don’t think I’m done yet, I won’t go down that easy though, either way. I’ll push myself forever more, after all my name correlates to “ever blossoming”. I’m still growing mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. Nobody’s perfect and I’m certainly not.

Love thyself first, and accept the law of the Universe. Peace.

Sincerely, Anonymous