Cure Your Inner Child

Maybe you've ever wondered "Why am I such a sensitive person?"

Like suddenly getting angry, suddenly anxious and things like that. That's often the reason your relationship falls apart. I don't know if the relationship ended. I don't know if you left or you go. But in the end you regret it. Some people can find the answer by looking at things that have just happened or something that is happening to them as a cause.

But for some it is not possible.

If you are one of those people who can't see the correlation between your behavior and things that are happening right now, maybe you can try to find correlations from far back in your past and maybe find the inner child within you. A small child hiding in your adult body.

Well, now we don't talk about ghosts, we are talking about part of the personality who actually feels things and responds to things like a child. That's why it is called the inner child.

The question is : What is the personality of this "little child"? Can it have an influence on who we are now? And how do we make peace with our inner child?

Well, a study published in 2016, provides a new understanding of the inner child. Through in-depth interviews,this research found that the inner child emerges through a person's understanding of their childhood experiences. In this research, the research participants said how their childhood experiences can be a valuable source of learning for them, as adults.

For example, through warm relationships with family, they believe that way to build and maintain relationships with other people through their experience of playing when they were little, they became aware of that. It's important to have fun once in a while so that you don't get tired.

Unfortunately, not everyone is so lucky to have an ideal childhood or a happy childhood. Not a few of us had bitter experiences as children which gives rise to perhaps... an uncomfortable feeling both physically and emotionally.

For example, when we were little we probably never or very rarely felt affection. Or we have never been hugged or kissed by our parents. Or we were never given the opportunity to play like that with our friends like other children. Or our opinions are always underestimated. Or when expressing an opinion, we get shouted at or get punished like that. And when we show happy emotions, maybe our parents don't care about us. When I'm sad, when I cry, instead I was told to stop and maybe threatened, if we don't stop.

In extreme cases, some people when they are little may actually get violence or their own basic needs like quality food and education may not be fulfilled. Some people feeling insecure because of this bad experience. This is what will eventually become a wound and be carried into adulthood.

So you have an adult body, but inside there may be wounds that were carried when you were little. Inside there was a small child. Inner child.

Why?

Because deep inside you there are hurt feelings that you should calm down first, but maybe it was neglected in the past. Since childhood, this wound controls your feelings and behavior. There is a small child, a wounded inner child, who whispers from within "This world is not safe. You have to continue to be extra careful."

Finally what happened? You're being super defensive, aren't you? You're so stressed. So sensitive and so on. All this time, you probably knew that people were bad like that. People don't care about you and even make you feel insecure. Yes, why start a relationship and give trust to someone like that?

You may also feel that you are inferior. You don't dare to try something new and don't dare to develop yourself. Because from when you were little it felt like you were always failing and people never remember what advantages you have. Then the biggest question is : If you now feel like there is a wounded inner child inside you. What can you do?

What we can try to do is treat the wound. Of course, like we are injured, we will treat the wound like that and you can try something called inner child healing. To do this, first you can try to get to know the small child inside your adult body. Maybe you can look at photos from your childhood. Are you trying to understand what it was that you went through and felt that way when you were little?

After you start to understand your inner child, try to communicate with him. What things does he need? Maybe there was something you really wanted to do when you were little, but couldn't. Or, when you were little you felt like no one loved or understood you. Well, this could be a problem. You are starting to understand that and starting to communicate with your inner child. From there, you will understand, What can you do to treat wounds that have been scarred since you were little?

It's like you are taking care of the little child inside you again. You convey your love to him and you show that you are trying to protect and fulfill his needs which may have been neglected.

Well, making peace with the past isn't an easy thing.