All I Want for Christmas

Aw, crap; it’s that time of year again. Didn’t we just have one of these? We’re sure it’s been a year? Yes? Ugh.

So, apparently, the holiday season is now upon us! Despite that, I’m not ready - at all.

I don’t intend to decorate this year: not a tree, not a string of lights, not a wreath. First off, I’m not up for it; this year has simply been too much for me to have the energy to deck the halls. Second, it’s been less than merry since family drama started up at the end of August; it’s been over 14 weeks and I still have neither talked to nor heard from my parents. Third, as I've grown older, I wonder why I even celebrate a Christian holiday as an Atheist. I mean, I was raised with it, but…. Adult me is kinda just asking - what the fuck even is the point? I’d rather buy myself the items I need and want than have someone else buy it and wrap it in needless, wasteful wrapping paper (because unless you save the stuff and reuse it, it’s just a waste all around). And, you know…

We have cats. Four of them. One of which (Milo, the ginger cat) has never seen a Christmas bulb and I’m afraid of what that little shit will get into - quite possibly the tree! And Catfish pulls the light bulbs from the light strands....

Cats, let me tell you.

So yeah, all that in mind, I’m not doing it this year. I didn’t do it last year either, but this year I initially thought I would. But I’ve got enough going on.

I guess the nice thing about not being on speaking terms with most of my family this year is that I am only worried about getting my nephews and my boyfriend’s niece gifts, and both of my teenage nephews just want cash. My partner and I don’t really do much gift-giving between us, outside of my boyfriend gifting me randomly throughout the year and me “picking something up” for him while I’m out and about.

Besides, I almost always ask for things I want for the house: new kitchen gadgets, towels, slippers...etc. I learned long ago that my mother is more likely to opt for something useful, so I stopped thinking about and asking for fun things I wanted. My birthday list earlier in August? File folders and a smaller, more portable dry erase board for the lower level of the house, since my big one in the office isn’t that mobile. I did get file folders, but since the family blowout was on my birthday…

...well, the dry erase board is still on my wishlist.

Actually, I found another, even smaller one I wouldn't mind in addition (all about those white boards - so useful!). I’ll probably buy them myself after the hectic package deliveries and returns slow down; I'm not in that big of a hurry for either and postal workers have it rough enough this time of year. I’d mainly use them for the summer months when it’s too hot in my upstairs office and I retreat to the ground level.

But, despite not being in the holiday spirit this year, I do have a few other items on my wishlist that would make this grim year full of drama much better - or at least start 2022 off on a better foot. I don't expect I'll hear from or patch things up with my parents for the holidays; there is too much that needs to be worked through first and I suspect things won't be resolved until I start seeing a therapist first.

Personally, I’d love some winewine. I’ve been out for a while. Assuming we do nothing for the holiday, it really adds to my experience playing World of Warcraft, where I mostly spend my time farming materials in the game - essentially, picking herbs. Wine, a good playlist, and World of Warcraft usually makes for a good night in my opinion. It’s fun with just the game and playlist, but getting a bit tipsy usually sees me actually singing along and just really digging the repetition of my preferred gameplay on another level. You might even say I'm downright jolly. Whether or not the critters appreciate my singing at 10 P.M. is another matter, though to their credit, they sleep next to me through it. I guess it’s not that bad.

Next, I have a long list of adult coloring books. My sister gave me a curse word one last year, and I’ve found coloring in it while listening to podcasts late at night quite relaxing, enjoyable, and a great way to get into the creative spirit before I often try to work on a project afterwards! Many are a bit pricey for a small number of pages, though, such as ones that have maybe 30 (sometimes really simplistic) drawings for $8-10. Others contain really nice drawings, or 100+ images for $6-8.

While the curse word one is fun, and I still have some pages to color, it is important to me to have images I really like. As such, the ones I’ve chosen contain animals (including dinosaurs!), mythical creatures, and gothic or fantasy themes. There's even ones of stoner Disney princesses! There are so many I would love to have. I do dislike adding to the felling of trees for this activity, but I can't deny that I enjoy it, and I am always looking to add a little more joy into my life. Especially when those rougher criminal cases get covered on the podcasts I'm listening to….

I’m also a huge fan of both coffee and tea. Just the normal stuff I can pick up from the local store. However, there is one tea in particular that I adore and buy in bulk; Celestial Seasonings’ “Tension Tamer”. I first tried it as a teenager and I love it. I'd be ecstatic with enough to get me through next year - I've really upped my tea intake as I try not to drink as much soda/pop.

The packaging is mostly eco-friendly, save for the sad bit of plastic that the individual boxes come wrapped in. Honestly, that surprises me, as none other than Boulder, Colorado is where the tea is packaged! Boulder is a very progressive part of the state, and can be labelled a “hippie town” by some of my fellow Coloradans. But the tea bags are not wrapped in foil or full of staples and needless extra tags, so I suppose I can’t be too upset, can I (psst, let’s all email them that we would like to see the plastic removed!).

I also buy tea that the big chain supplier, Kroger/King Soopers, packages and sells - and their boxes feature no plastic. Of course, their tea bags are often wrapped in foil pouches individually (sadly, my other favorite tea is their chai), and they often do have extra tags and staples.

Last, but certainly not least, I want an old classmate to finally reach his GoFundMe goal. I've donated a small amount and shared the link since June.

He first laughed at COVID-19, but he’s since regretted it and more than paid for his dismissal: he’s been hospitalized for COVID-19, lost his appendix, and the building he lived in caught fire while he’s been in the hospital. For months, I’ve monitored the progress of his goal of $7,000, sharing the link time and time again on Facebook. For a long time, he was at just under $6,000, and he’s finally gotten that. But it’s now been over a month since the last donation!

My final ask for this holiday season is for him to finally meet his GoFundMe goal, so that he doesn’t have to keep worrying about medical bills. If you are willing and able to do so, please consider donating! I know he would appreciate it so much!

So there it is - all I want for Christmas this year! I suppose it's quite a lot. Really, I'd be happy if my friend didn't have to worry about his medical bills anymore; he's had an even more stressful year than me. That's what I want most.

I hope if you've read this, you have a happy, healthy holiday season; give your friends and family and pets an extra hour of your time for me, please. Deck the halls, gather round a cozy fire, and drink some awesome hot chocolate! Be merry! Be jolly!

From our household to yours,

Happy Holidays - Merry Christmas!