About Your First Serious Relationship, Tips for First Love

Your first serious relationship - often, when you get involved in your first serious relationship, you give yourself completely and put all your trust in your first partner. You feel that this is the relationship you were looking for, that it will last forever. You think you know everything, but the truth is that you are just beginning to learn…

Relationships are never simple: although it seems to you that love is all that matters, a relationship must be based on others… The first serious couple relationship is a beautiful one - but, unfortunately, it is also one that often ends badly.

This is because the partners get involved in the relationship with the innocence and enthusiasm specific to their age and first romantic experience, they get involved confident and confident that their relationship is unique, that it is not like others.

For many, the first serious relationship remains a memory, a memory at the same time sweet and bitter: because we live the first suffering in love.

And no matter how much we felt then that the first partner is unique, that we will love him forever, we are surprised after years and years that we can barely remember that face that we loved so much. It is an experience from which we learn: we learn what it means to be in a relationship and what mistakes to avoid in the future.

But when you are in your first serious relationship, it is hard for you to think that this could have an end. Do you believe or try to convince yourself that you two are different, that you two will resist, and that the relationship will always be beautiful?

It's okay - you don't have to enjoy your first relationship, no matter what happens. Living with the fear of the end steals from this beautiful experience. But maybe some tips can help you…

When you are in your first serious relationship:

Try not to let your first partner change you - don't forget who you are and not become what he/she wants you to be! Sometimes it happens that a long relationship changes a lot - and if and when it ends, you no longer recognize yourself, you are no longer who you knew you were and it is too difficult for you to find yourself, to manage on your own. Yes, during any relationship you grow, you adapt, you change a little - but you must not forget who you are and what goals and desires you have in life.

In other words, although the idea is romantic in itself, it is not good for you to make the relationship the center of your life, forgetting about yourself and others. It is not good to be dependent on your partner, to become dependent on him, to need a relationship like water; because when your center is the other if it ends, your whole world will be destroyed. And especially it is not good for you to let yourself be dominated, manipulated, controlled, changed.

No matter how much you are in love, try to give your partner time and space for himself. Yes, in the first serious relationship, everything seems so great, you are so involved and happy that you want to spend every moment together. Whatever you do - you'd rather be with your loved one.

It is not very good: a constant approach, without letting you breathe, will lead to the feeling of suffocation; to the feeling that it is far too much. Although it seems to you now that it is impossible to get tired, to get bored of each other, to spend every day together and to do almost everything together can lead to this result.

Try not to rush. Many young people, once they get involved in their first serious relationship, are so enthusiastic and confident that they take the big steps in the relationship too soon. Believing that nothing can go wrong between them, that their love is the strongest, they choose to move in together and get married early in the relationship. And many of them reach a painful separation in just a few years.

Marriages at a young age and after too little time together are also the most vulnerable. Yes, there are happy cases in which young married people maintain a harmonious relationship and form a beautiful life together. But there are many unfortunate cases: when young people realize after a few years together that they are in a hurry, that they have decided to spend their lives together too soon and based only on their crazy love…

Even if you feel that way, do decide too quickly that it is ready, this is and will always be the right relationship!

Beware of intense emotions - you love with passion, enthusiasm, ardor… But you will feel other very strong emotions in your first serious relationship, emotions that could make you act wrong. One of these is jealousy, which in turn gives birth to anger, frustration, sadness. Try to manage your strong emotions and not become obsessed with control.

A common mistake is to want your partner just for you, to become too possessive and jealous, to try to control everything. The reality is that you can't control everything in a relationship and that looking at your partner as just yours is harmful: yes, you are together, but this does not imply complete possession of the other!

Often, the first relationships we have ended because of endless quarrels, quarrels arising from jealousy, possessiveness, the inability of the two partners to be together but to remain independent.

One more thing: you get so involved sometimes that whatever your partner says and does affect you strongly; any small word can hurt you, any act can make you fearful or sad… You become too sensitive and overreact (learn that not every word or act has hidden meanings and try not to become a slave to emotions).

Don't go for less than your full potential. Ignoring something, that something does not disappear, but grows in time. Unfortunately, during the first relationship, you tend to ignore the negative things and hope that everything will be fine.

You also tend to be blind to certain things that don't work in the relationship: you love your partner so much that you think the negative aspects don't matter (sometimes you don't even see them). It even happens to be blind to the reality that your partner is not suitable or not good for you; and if your friends suggest this to you, you get mad at them, ignoring what they are trying to show you.

Likewise, if the two can't discuss an issue, they can't get over a heated argument, they can't learn to compromise and forgive - inexperienced partners sometimes conclude that an ugly quarrel means the end…

Innocence… An important reason why the first serious relationship can end sooner or later is the need, felt by one of the partners, to experiment, to find out how it is with someone else - the need for something new.

When you have not had other romantic experiences, you have not had other partners, especially when you were virgins at the beginning of the relationship, after a while together, one of you may feel the need to live other experiences - which leads to infidelity or separation…