"A NOTE TO MY YOUNGER SELF"

January 4, 2024

Dear Ms. Vicki,

I realize you were raised with a double standard as the aftereffects of being born in 1949.

You were born on September 18, 1949. The most popular song of that year was "Ragtime Cowboy Joe" by Jo Stafford. The most popular movie was " Miss Grant Takes Richmond" starring Lucille Ball and William Holden. It was a comedy about a secretary who unwittingly helps her boss run a betting parlor.

You have so much potential as a young woman. You were born with so many talents. However, you were told as a woman you had to buckle down, take care of your man. You questioned that point of view by asking questions of all the family. You thought you were born again, as you looked out your window counting the stars, asking the universe why you were here in this house, in this family, and now what God? You heard a choir singing far away, as though the angels were answering your question.

You grew up learning to play the piano for hours, writing music, and singing the blues. Your mom, grandma, and your dad were your biggest fans,

As time went on you were told you could not be a singer, or none of the things you were interested in at that time. There were only four things a woman was allowed to do in 1949.

1. Housewife, baby maker, homemaker

2. Secretary

3. Nurse

4. Retail clerk

Then when your dad tried to teach you mechanics, your mom told you, "Baby girl, ladies don't work on cars." So, you went inside the house crying tears of pain because your dad was your hero. Your mom did not know any better. Your dad told your mom, "Honey, there will be a time when ladies do work on cars. At least I wanted to teach her the basics."

Your dad worked long hours except he never worked on a Sunday as that was his family time. Your poppa bought you all the latest rock n roll music of the 60's and 70's. Music was the go-to for everything in your family.

You visited a nightclub when you were 15. You stepped onto the stage singing, "I'm Sorry" by Brenda Lee.

Of course, you were only 15, and your dad found you, and pulled you off stage. Sometime after that you quit singing and playing the piano. That was devastating to you. After that you would sit in your room writing lyrics and poetry listening to all the latest bands.

You grew up in a male patriarchal society. A woman could not buy a house or car without her husband. You marched for equal rights for women and for civil rights for people of color.

When the 70's arrived and the women's movement had opened doors for women to go to college and not be codependent on their husbands, your dad sent you to a nursing school. You studied your nursing, working as a nurse while attending college. You changed your major to Business Management. After your marketing professor marked your paper F minus about buying name brand clothes at a thrift store, you switched to Journalism. The paper was supposed to be about buying clothes at Neiman Marcus, but you rebelled, and instead you researched thrift stores and name brand clothes.

You discovered you had an IQ of 135 upon enrolling in college. You remember that you were told in 1967 your IQ was 94, below average. You were being prepared to survive in a male patriarchal society where men were smart, and women were 2nd class citizens.

You rebelled against the patriarchal society. You still loved men, but not always choosing the best characters.

I want to explain, Ms. Vicki, that you listened to everyone, but, yet, kept going to college and aspiring to fulfill your dreams. You worked at The LA Times when you were 30. However, you were introduced to a dude by his brother that worked there. You married him and had two babies as you thought your time clock was running out. When you landed the job at The LA Times it was not about marriage or babies. So, once again, you lived your double standard. The marriage ended in 1989.

Then you worked with a dude in the music and film industry whom you married for a period of ten years.

You never had to marry anyone or have children to fulfill your womanly desires or have a career.

I tell you as your younger self, finish your degree, and don't marry because you think you must. Work hard, play hard, and study hard. It's your life. Then one day, you would meet the artist who respects you as a human being not as a 2nd class citizen.

Please write your own stories, interview the same stars you interviewed with your man except do these procedures as a woman that is educated, strong, and successful.

I tell you, Ms. Vicki, you are a unique, eccentric, creative artist. You don't need a man to make you a whole person. The truth be told it's the man who needs a woman to make them feel like a man.

So, as a young woman you can do anything your heart desires, and use your talents in your career, not worried about your man. Your man will love you for your strong qualities not just a ragtime cowboy side kick, but as a partner in life as a friend and a lover.

"GO FOR 'THE GUSTO, MS. VICKI!"

The rock song of 2023 was "ANGRY" By The Rolling Stones. The best movie of 2023 was "Love at First Sight" on Netflix. Have we changed in the last decades? Yes, there are many changes. We stream music and movies through the internet. We no longer must go to the theater or concerts to see stars.

There is a group of people in America today who want women to go back to 1949. Ms. Vicki, please work to not let this happen in 2024. If there was a time machine I would like to sit and talk to my younger self to tell you to not marry just because it's the trend. Do not have babies just because your internal clock is ticking. Study, work, play, but do it on your own please.

Ms. Vicki, you love your kids and grands very much. Surely you know your kids and grands have so many choices as men or women. There's a new future ahead. There's a rainbow of colors spreading all over the land. The Earth turns in motion to the beat of eternity as we learn to move forward for equality for all.

We move to the beat of the past, present, and future. MS. Vicki you are strong and will survive your lovers, husbands, and still be strong in 2024.

I have traveled back to 1969 to watch you, prepare you for your future self of being a successful, intelligent woman of the future.

So, this time machine is a lucky star for everyone and everything.

The star is you, Ms. Vicki.

WRITTEN BY

VICKI LAWANA TRUSSELLI

JANUARY 4, 2024

I thought about the time machine concept and the past, present, and future before completing this story letter to my younger self, Ms. Vicki.