A Cultural Migraine

When I was a child, in the early 1980s, we were taught that America was a place where anything was possible. The American dream we were told, was well in reach. You get your education. You work hard, and in the end, you get the life you always wanted. You wake up in the morning, and you go to a job that's enjoyable and fulfilling. You leave work and travel to your two story home, with a two car garage to house your two Chevrolets.

You arrive home to see the family dog running around your well manicured yard, behind a white picket fence. You walk up the sidewalk happy to be home, and your two well behaved children greet you at the door with hugs. You hang up your jacket and walk into the kitchen to find your beautiful wife in a sun dress and apron. She's just putting supper on the table, all without a hair out of place.

"Welcome home dear" she says with a smile as she shuffles over to kiss you on the cheek. The table is set perfectly, the place mats perfectly square beneath each plate. The aroma of steak fills your nostrils. You say grace over this most perfect of meals, and take your seat to have a lovely supper. After cleaning their plates, the children ask if they may be excused to go outside. With a nod from you, they take their plates to the sink and go out into the yard to play.

After finishing your plate, your ever loving wife comes to take your empty plate away. "Why don't you go have a seat in your recliner and watch some television dear?" she says. You stand from your seat and rub your full belly before shuffling off to your leather recliner. With your feet up, layed back at just the right angle, you grab the remote control from the end table and flip on the tube to watch Sports Center. How about them Dodgers?

Almost immediately after you sit down, the Mrs. comes in to bring you an ice cold Corona. It's even got a little lime wedge stuffed into the neck of the bottle. You'll spend the rest of your evening right here... fat, happy, and content. In the morning, you'll get up and do it all over again. This is what we were conditioned to expect. It was engrained in us from the cradle, all the way to graduation. Unfortunately, it was all a beautiful lie.

In reality, you're probably going to get up in the morning and go to a job that you absolutely hate. You're probably not going to make even nearly the money you deserve. What money you do make, the IRS is going to mug you for at lease a quarter of it before you ever see it. That beautiful house is probably going to end up being a crappy, government subsidized apartment if you're lucky. It'll be your mom's dank, dark, basement if you're not.

If you're lucky enough to have two cars, you'll probably have to sell one of them just to put gas in the other. The beautiful wife of your dreams, is probably going to shave her head and join some radical fourth wave feminist group. She'll probably divorce you and take at least half of everything you've worked for. She's definitely going to get the house and the kids. Without you in the picture, your own kids will likely be turned against you. They'll almost certainly be indoctrinated and warped through the educational system and the media until they're not sure who they are or which bathroom to use.

As for you, after all your hard work, you're going to be left with nothing. You'll be sitting on a corner somewhere, scratching your head and trying to figure out how everything went so wrong. By this point you've probably already lost your job. You probably can't get any help because you've worked all your life. Everybody knows that in the eyes of the welfare state that's the worst thing in the world you could have ever done. You're somebody who gives money away, not somebody who receives it. You probably can't afford to pay child support on your kids so you're ex can live it up with her new life partner. She won't like that, and she'll call big brother and tell them about it for sure.

If you cant pay, no problem. They'll just throw you in the pen for a few years for the crime of being broke. By the time you get out, they'll have racked up a whole new bill for you to go to jail over. The worst part about all of this, particularly if you happen to be of a lighter complexion, is that the whole world will point at you and say "He's the bad guy!" They'll say you're what's wrong with the world. What is it about you that makes them so disgusted by you? Your identity as a straight, white, male is your true crime. Don't you feel privileged?