10 Stupid Mistakes Women Make Destroying Their Relationships and Lives

A wonderful article based on the observations in the book by Laura Shlezinger, an American psychologist who has a radio show. She is often overwhelmed with questions about love and relationships.

After several years of analyzing women's complaints, Laura wrote in her book, "Ten Foolish Mistakes Women Make to Lose Their Lives."

Here they are:

Mistake no. 1. Stupid habits

Often a woman's success is appreciated depending on whether or not she has someone. Often women are afraid that they will not be able to find anyone later and they choose at random.

Tip: Women who say they are unlucky in love have chosen this path on their own. Increase your attitude towards yourself and don't humiliate yourself. We must learn to be courageous, insistent, and confident.

Mistake no. 2. Pay attention in vain

Millions of cinderellas around the world looking sadly out the window, sad that the prince is no longer coming…

If you tend to say thank you to everyone who pays attention to you, or when you meet a man, you're ready to shout, "I'm not alone anymore!" - You probably won't make the right choice. To bond with a man just to escape loneliness is an escape from reality.

A man notices the difference between when you need him and when you are desperately trying to be with someone. Don't turn it into a wound dressing.

Tip: Choose who to meet on your own, don't wait to be chosen. Get over the loneliness period, find a passion, meet friends.

Mistake no. 3. Blind fidelity

If the woman repeats in every corner that she loves the man, she usually lies to those around her. It's weird, but for many women, love is something beyond rational (story-driven behavior).

Why do we accept this and not make the choice ourselves, why do we call everything in our way love? Because that's how we don't trust ourselves.

By telling anyone "I love you" you think about yourself that you will never find someone better, you do not want to be alone, it is better than nothing, he is better than what you have had so far and the list goes on.

Tip: Don't confuse feelings about good relationships with fantasies and book promises. Feelings must be real.

Mistake no. 4. Passion without meaning

In terms of the intimate aspect of relationships, it is better to slow down than to hurry. Proximity and intimacy are far too different. Proximity is when you can talk to your friend about everything. Intimate closeness is something more.

Tip: It doesn't matter how old you are. Sex cannot determine the value of your relationship with a man. Hasty sex can make you regret it much more, intensifying your sense of loneliness.

Mistake no. 5. Hasty cohabitation

You've heard the idea that it would be good to live together until the wedding to get to know each other better. According to statistics, the frequency of divorces among those who lived together before the wedding is higher than those who went directly to the altar.

It all comes down to why the woman accepts cohabitation. It's a kind of capitulation: men are afraid of official responsibility, the woman decides to come to meet them.

When he says, "I have to see if I'm always going to be okay," she says, "I have to be very careful." Such a scenario will not work in the long run.

Tip: To get the man to respect you, do not lower the level of your requirements. If he can't get up to you, it's better to break up with him.

Mistake no. 6. Unsuccessful expectations.

When you decide to get married, don't expect him to change overnight. You better be careful what story you're involved in. Sometimes the things that attracted you so much to him become unbearable. You always create huge expectations. But the chosen one turns out to be different anyway, and then you start hating him. Although you hate yourself.

Tip: If you are married, to protect yourself from childhood upheavals, end this relationship as soon as possible. It is impossible to change the past. If you are married and hate your husband, look for the source of hatred in you first.

Mistake no. 7. Unfulfilled plans.

When you decide to get married, don't expect him to become someone else overnight. You better be careful what story you're involved in. Often the things that attracted you so much to him become unbearable. You always create huge expectations. But the chosen one turns out to be different anyway. Then you start hating him. Although you hate yourself.

Tip: If you are married, to protect yourself from childhood upheavals, end this relationship as soon as possible. It is impossible to change the past. If you are married and hate your husband, look for the source of hatred in you first.

Mistake no. 8. Simply nonsense.

It's awful when women act despite their maternal instincts. Some women allow their offspring to be hit… terribly.

Tip: Your child will never forgive you for not protecting him. Don't let anyone hurt your children. Don't sacrifice your children for the sake of a man or an imaginary passion.

Mistake no. 9. In vain help.

Little girls are often upset if something doesn't go the way they like. But where does this annoyance go when I grow up? Women get upset, cry, suffer, get depressed just because they are afraid to show up.

Depression is nothing more than an experience of a situation, while an upset at the right time could have solved the problem and created certain limits.

Tip: There are painful moments in life, going over them is the price we pay to develop our character. That doesn't mean we have to be humiliated. Don't stay with those who abuse you.

Mistake no. 10. Stupid forgiveness.

Women are patient. They can make up a million excuses just for not breaking up with an unworthy man. We keep repeating that if we leave, we will become unhappy. Possible. But at least you'll be able to find an independent, enterprising man. You always have a choice!

Tip: Don't live by the principle: how to change something without touching it. Look inside yourself, there you will find courage, independence, and initiative. You always have a choice!

The mystery of female attraction

It is known that women laugh much more than men. Especially in companies with funny people. It seems that men prefer to make someone laugh, rather than amuse themselves with the jokes of others. Such asymmetry can be observed from childhood.

German psychologists analyzed women's reactions to conversations with unknown men. Thus, they determined that the more the woman laughs, the greater the interest in the person she is talking to. And men liked their laughter.

One factor that proves that the relationship between a man and a woman is harmonious is the woman's laughter, not the man's. Men may or may not laugh, but if a woman does not hear a woman laugh, it is a bad sign.