The Wishing Ledger

In the still of the night a person can sometimes find the greatest reflection. Choices of the past can creep back into your conscious. Forcing you to mull over the thought that maybe your life would have been different if only you did this, instead of that. Or how can I get rich so I don’t have to go to work tomorrow. All of these thoughts and more are rushing through my head as I walk quickly through the rain to get home.

“What is going on, the forecast said nothing about rain.” I think to myself as water seeps into my shoes.

“It’s just my luck that I have a 10 minute walk in this weather.”

As the rain falls I think about the 2 umbrellas sitting in the stand next to my front door. The rain drops hitting my face with a steady rhythm creating a melody that is both relaxing and annoying. The only thing that keeps me from losing my mind on this night is this walk. It has always been my time to reflect. My own personal therapy. It’s been the time for me to work through all the troubles that plague my mind relentlessly. That is until this night. Until I come to this alley.

I know what you’re thinking. An alley? So what? There’s nothing special about an alley in a city. There are thousands. The thing is, I have lived in this city for over 8 years now. Walked this route every time I've needed to go to my favorite store. I have never seen this alley before. Could it be that I’m normally so caught up in my own thoughts that I've just missed it each time.

“No. There’s no way.” I thought to myself as I peered into the dismal alley.

The darkness was so dense that as I looked into it, I felt uneasy. Like it was looking back. It sent a chill through my body so deep that it stirred my soul.

“It’s got to be the rain” I think as I snap out of the trance.

I remember that it’s cold and raining. This chill I’m feeling must come from that. As I turn to continue walking I notice a small black book laying at the foot of the alley. It’s odd. How did I not notice it and how does it still look dry.

“It’s no concern of mine” I think to myself and walk away.

Walking. I once again begin to contemplate my life’s direction. It isn’t until I feel I’ve come to a conclusion that I realize how long I’ve been walking. At this pace I should be home by now. I focus on where I am and a feeling of dread washes over me as I notice the alley. Still shrouded in an all encompassing shadow with that black book at the foot of the entrance.

“When did I circle around?!” my mind yells.

“I felt myself walking straight the entire time, how did I get back here?”

Once again I begin walking towards my home. Laser focused on the path I take, I’m determined not to get turned around again. Quickly my feet move along the pavement then abruptly stop. I can’t believe my eyes. It’s the alley!

“No! No way! I paid attention this time! I know I went straight! This can’t be” I yell into the night as I sprint in the direction of my building.

The rain seems to be coming down even harder making it difficult for me to see as the water splashes into my eyes.

“What’s going on?” I think to myself.

I come to a stop and hunch over trying to catch my breath. A feeling of defeat washes over my very being as I stand once again in front of the alley. It’s darkness calling to me, trying to absorb every unfortunate thing it encounters. Only this time, there’s something different. On the book there’s a small note that reads, For Vince.

It’s in calligraphy so someone took their time making this.

“Who are you?!” I yell in to the empty streets.

“What do you want?!” I follow up.

Who is doing this to me and why, I wonder. I’m nobody. I don’t have an important job, no valuables to my name, about $20 in my bank account. There’s no way someone is expecting to get anything from me. I take a step towards the alley, then another and another until I am standing at the threshold of this emptiness. Once again peering in to the hungry shadow ready to devour my essence. I hate the feeling but suffer through it to pick up the book. Suddenly with a gust of wind the darkness is absorbed into the book. I’m terrified at the sight of this but something in the air has changed. The rain has stopped.

“Go home” something whispers into my ear.

Although alarmed by what is happening I compose myself and begin walking in the direction of my apartment building. I stop at the corner that has been both the beginning and the end of this eternal loop that has had me trapped. I can’t help but wonder if I can make it out this time or will I have a break down as I’m forced through another mysterious loop. My foot moves forward, steps down onto the street and a feeling of relief washes over me as I cross over to my building. I never would’ve thought I would feel such relief just to be here. A tear rolls down my cheek as I type in the code to open the front door then find myself finally home sitting in my chair, trying to rationalize what has just happened.

“Am I overworked” I wonder to myself.

It definitely could be stress but just before I get totally lost in my thoughts I hear a loud whisper echo from across the room.

“Vince, Vince, Vince, Vince.”

“What the hell? Who’s there?” I say as I look around in confusion.

Silence. I take that as proof that I’m just stressed and need to rest for a while. I close my eyes and lean back in the chair.

“Use me!” the voice now yells even louder in a whispered tone.

“Who is it?” I call out.

“Over here” the voice calls from the kitchen.

It’s coming from the place I put the book.

“It can’t be, is this book talking to me?” I ask myself as I sit frozen contemplating the perplexity of the situation I've found myself in.

I walk over to the book and stare at it, not knowing what I expect to happen but a thought to open the book calls to me. I reach my hand out and touch the cover. Admiring the work done to make a book such as this. The leather feels smooth and the stitching is impeccable. Across the front it reads The Wishing Ledger. It’s still cold and I don’t understand why it isn’t wet. I open the cover to see that someone has already written inside. It reads...

To you, weary traveler of life

this book we present to calm your strife.

It isn’t much

but it’s what we do.

To tip the scales

and give your due.

Your deepest desires we’ll bring to light

just write it down and change your plight.

I pause for a second.

“What the hell is this.” I turn the page to see if there is anything else and I’m glad I did, because there’s a warning.

BEWARE:

You write your desires

and we grant it post haste.

But be specific

or that wish will waste.

Make your wish and make it right

For every wish will swallow your light.

“So this book grants wishes” A smile emerges on my face and I chuckle a little at the absurdity of the idea that a book can grant my desires just by writing in it.

Sitting back in my chair I close my eyes hoping to get some sleep. But I can’t. What if this book actually does have the power to grant my deepest desire. I know it can’t be real, but what if. I keep myself awake by this thought and with a huff I get back up, grab a pen and lean over to write my first entry.

“What do I want? What do I want?” I mutter as I feel the need to test the book.

“I want money!” I wonder why I had to think so hard.

I press the pen against the paper. It seems to glide across the page like it has a mind of its own. I write...twenty thousand bucks.

The light on my desk blows out with a loud crack. I stand there for a moment waiting for the money to magically show up but nothing. I laugh and close the book. Thinking of how crazy this all sounds until I hear the most unusual racket from outside. I open my window to see a herd of deer walking through the streets. The herd went on for as far as the eye could see. I looked over and noticed my neighbor staring down at the animals, the look of bewilderment was plastered on both our faces as we looked at one another.

He looked back down and said to me “Where did all these bucks come from.”

I froze. What did he just say? Bucks. I look back down the street at the endless herd. Is this...twenty thousand bucks?

“It can’t be. This isn’t what I meant.” I whisper.

It was then that the warning popped in my head. I pulled my head back into the house and closed my window. I can’t believe this book actually works. I briskly walk back into my kitchen, pick up the pen and go to write again. I give pause thinking about how wrong my first entry turned out and know I must be specific this time. I move the pen across the page, this time writing 20,000 U.S. dollars. Another light in my living room blows out. Which is odd because I’m sure I just changed that bulb, but I get distracted because almost simultaneously a pile of money drops onto my coffee table with a thud. I pick it up and run my thumb over it.

“It’s real!” I proclaim loudly.

I run back over to the kitchen table and begin scribbling everything I’ve always wanted into the book. They all come to pass but when I look up from writing I notice it’s dreadfully dark in my home. Like the all encompassing shadow from the alley earlier.

There should at least be some kind of light coming from outside, but there’s nothing. I get up, walk to the window and see nothing but the twenty thousands bucks still in the street. I turn around to see my money on the table alongside the PS5 I just wished for. I go to my front door and open it, it’s dim in the hallway. The panic I had when I peered into the alley earlier begins to set in.

“What’s going on?” my mind races as it tries to answer that question.

I walk over to my neighbors apartment, bang on the door. It opens.

“Hey I need your help, something is going on.” I yell exasperated.

He looks up and down the hallway.

“Hello” he yells out then closes his door.

It was like he couldn’t see me at all. I run down the stairs and stand in the middle of the still busy lobby. Attempting to interact with everyone but no one can see or hear me. It wasn’t until someone walks through me that I lost my nerve and dropped down on my knees.

“What’s going on?!” I yell out as tears run down my cheeks and pool on the lobby floor.