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The Old Storybook

An Entry for the Spooky Micro Challenge

By Rachel DeemingPublished about a year ago Updated about a year ago 1 min read
The Old Storybook
Photo by Sergiu Vălenaș on Unsplash

There was only one rule: don’t open the door.

Mummy and Daddy had said so before they'd gone out.

"We could always open the window," Saskia said, craftily.

The night was tempting them, misty with cold vapours. The darkness danced and beguiled the girls.

Tales from the storybook they'd found filled their heads. Leather-bound with embossed swirls, their days had flown with flights of fancy released from its pages, opening worlds to them.

Ellen was unsure.

Saskia reassured her: "We'll wedge the window with the storybook."

Ellen was scared but Saskia was persuasive.

"Can we unlock the door too?" Ellen pleaded.

Saskia rolled her eyes and sighed. "Okay, but it's not necessary."

Ellen thought that Mummy and Daddy would be mad if they knew.

From the woods, eyes watched the girls with fascination and wicked expectation as they climbed down. Such little girls, so pretty with the moonlight shimmering on their hair. Very easy to track.

Holding hands, Saskia and Ellen wondered wide-eyed at the night-time world they had entered and wandered further into the unknown.

*

Saskia's shriek pierced the stillness of the night.

And suddenly, they were running, running for their lives, panting and desperate! So scared! Help! They ran blindly, stumbling but they were almost there! Almost at the house! Saskia could hear her little sister's sobs as she dragged her. Crashing pursued them and their pounding hearts.

"Come on, Ellen!" Saskia screamed.

They were there! Running, sprinting for the door!

Saskia desperately reached for the knob.

Locked.

No!

The window!

Frantically, the girls ran round the house, terrified by the panting of pursuit coming ever closer.

They made it!

*

But there are no happily ever afters.

The book lied.

By the shut window were the open pages of an old storybook where it had landed.

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About the Creator

Rachel Deeming

Storyteller. Poet. Reviewer. Traveller.

I love to write. Check me out in the many places where I pop up:

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My blog

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Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

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Comments (18)

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  • R. B. Boothabout a year ago

    This was great. I agree with Kathrine, the pacing was perfect. Good job and best of luck!

  • Katherine J. Zumpanoabout a year ago

    Loved the pacing of this. I was on the edge of my seat the whole time!

  • D.K. Shepardabout a year ago

    Such a cool and creative take! The suspense built so well to such a well crafted ending!

  • Hannah Mooreabout a year ago

    Books lie! I mean, this would be an important lesson, if they lived to learn it.

  • Testabout a year ago

    The intensity of this piece was spot on!! Such a great entry Rachel!!

  • John Coxabout a year ago

    You crammed a lot into a few words. Methinks daily practice paid off in this beaut! Great challenge entry, Rachel!

  • Mark Gagnonabout a year ago

    Great writing as always, Rachel. Good Luck!

  • Caroline Cravenabout a year ago

    What an ending!!!! Holy moly! This was a belter!

  • Laura.the.writerabout a year ago

    Wow, I had to read that twice!😯 The suspense was built great Rachel, I felt like running for my life with them!👏

  • Silver Dauxabout a year ago

    I loved this! The tension was so well done and incredibly intense. I love that the book led them astray. So cool!

  • D. J. Reddallabout a year ago

    They're booked. Deftly done!

  • Cathy holmesabout a year ago

    That was intense. Well done.

  • Jason “Jay” Benskinabout a year ago

    love this one. felt like the build up was internal. great work.

  • Daphsamabout a year ago

    Very well written! Great build up!

  • Cindy Calderabout a year ago

    I really liked the symbolism in this story, Rachel, though I much prefer happy endings…..

  • Listen to your parents! Good one Rachel!

  • But what does that ending even mean? Sorry for being slow 😅😅

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