SL1438

No one can hear a scream for the vacuum of space so they say. They would be right, whoever they may be actually; but I wonder, are they aware that their truth is both my biggest blessing while simultaneously my greatest curse. The proof will be oh so apparent shortly. For now; hang tight let me bring them up to speed so to speak.

It was the third little bang bang as the Scientist called it. I remember twiggy Leroy Johnson cannot stop repeating that damn catchphrase:

“third little bang bang will be here soon”

“but thankfully we can orbit on Jupiter‘s third moon.”

I so despised that arrangement of syllables. And that damn screamer I mean teacher Miss Jody Davis. I bet she wishes she could have scalpeled the third aorta of little Leroy‘s blood pumper if she only had a chance.

So yes third little bang bang did it need come, however, it showed up a wu month early. The chaos, the carnage, for a fifth grade child to be forced to experience and witness the head on collision of when ‘No more home planet crash directly into only enough ships for half the population. Fathers having to make the impossible choice of which child. Mothers, being left behind to rot and have their limb ripped apart, while stuck under who knows what. Thank goodness I did not have to see any of what may or may not have transpired on that fateful day. Obviously I was comfortably asleep on daddy‘s personal rocket yacht. However, this little situation we are heading towards is completely the foul tasting result of daddy’s brilliant mind. And well, my ability to completely shut off mine. Either which way that event was in fact the catalyst which sparked my first visit to this exact space and well this exact time.

Not shortly I will go and return to well let’s use the name Henry. Yes. Perfect. Henry, you know like Henry, Henry the eighth I am I am. Henry the eighth I am. That is from your timeline. No? So the spot that our dear friend Henry is so kindly occupying while we finish this little interaction you will no doubt reflect back on countless times before that final singular half gasp of breath extinguishes from your lifeless corpse.

Well anyways, that’s a spot that is very very special and dear to me personally. Do you have any idea of just how proud of myself I was when I discovered the exact coordinates and the perfect amount of vortexual wind pressure each fragile deeply scarred hand of mine must produce in order to open the third specxeltema large enough to fit mister Henry The 8th, myself and all those listening into this delightful vacuum Of space I do fundly referred to as Bertha. Yes Bertha after my original schoolboy crush. The lonely solar flare visible in the abyss known to be my blood pumper. Wow, only now that I am saying it do I realize that Bertha is also my third grandmother‘s name. How comical huh?

Espotaelisa, we are finally properly equipped and fully perpared. to open the portal to here forth forever known as….BANG!! Wait! What is that noise? Could they have possibly detected me. Here. In a spot unmarked on galaxy’s mapodex. Could they possibly be wanting to take dear Henry away from me, from us?? Could there be any way that they could at all manifest even the slightest glimpse of a dream of a vision of victory over me?? No matter the noise. BANG. BANG. BANG. BANG. BANG.

Now is the exact moment the gods secretly envisioned as they conspired to persuade each planet into the precisely perfect formation needed to produce one such greatness as myself. Let us go in.