Interview with a dis-satisfied customer on Halloween
WFFS Reporting LIVE!!
We bring you to the Walmart Superstore this October 31st where a customer appears to be having a complete meltdown.
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Reporter: Sir, uhm Sir? Can I have your name?
Customer: My name is MR. Skel E. Ton
Reporter: Okay. Mind if I call you Skele?
Customer: YES!
Reporter: Alright. Mr. Ton, what seems to be the problem here? You seem very upset.
Customer: Look around you! What do you see??
Reporter: Well, let's see..... Cute check out girl.. Sales on Gunpowder... Uhm...*stammers*
Customer: Open your eyes, you buffoon!
Reporter: Well, I do see a lot of Christmas decorations being unpacked.
Customer: Give the man a pumpkin pie!! That's right! Christmas decorations!!
Reporter: Okay. So what about Christmas decorations?
Customer: What is the date today??
Reporter: October 31, 2024
Customer: Exactly! These Consumeristic underbelly of a Superstore have the audacity to put out Christmas decorations before Halloween is even over! This is an insult to every Vampire, Witch and Ghoul in our great country! Seriously! Let us have our day! It's Halloween, for fuck sake!
Reporter: So you are angry that the Christmas decorations are being put out today, then?
Customer: I am OUTRAGED! This is America! Home of Freddy Kruger movies, Candy Corn and Caramel Apples! It's not even November yet!What's wrong with this world? Doesn't anyone care how confusing this is to the children of the world. My son asked me would Santa be trick or treating with us!!! I mean seriously!?!?!
Reporter: I can see your point.
Customer: "No, not yet you can't! HAPPY NEW YEAR dumbass! **STABS REPORTER WITH SWITCHBLADE AND LAUGHS** Now, you get my point!
Narrator: THE END.. Merry... OUCH! ok ok..
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This Breaking News Story was Submitted to the below Challenge:
If you like this read my terrifying story:
About the Creator
ᔕᗩᗰ ᕼᗩᖇTY
Sam Harty is a poet of raw truth and quiet rebellion. Author of Lost Love Volumes I & II and The Lost Little Series, her work confronts heartbreak, trauma, and survival with fierce honesty and lyrical depth. Where to find me
The Screams Beneath the Floorboards
Old houses make noise. They creak, groan, and sigh as if remembering things they were never meant to keep. That’s what I told myself when I first heard it—a faint sound beneath my feet, barely louder than the wind slipping through cracked windows.
By David John4 days ago in Horror
Comments (7)
Love it! 💀
This is the first entry to the contest that I've read in a "news report" format. Good job!
I love it. The audacity, pshaw. A bit of violence, hope he not dead. Very cleverly done indeed.
lol, this was really clever. Like the format and the delivery, and also the appeal to a relatable frustration. Halloween isn’t far behind Christmas in terms of it being a capitalist frenzy, but at least the aesthetic is easier to get behind. Hope you’re having a good holiday :)
Hahaha!! I love it.😂😂
Ouch , thank you for this one, I got the point too
a sign of the times, enjoyed your story 😀😀