A Day in the Life of Grandma Bau

Administrator Yuan poured the tea to go with the opened pomegranate. He had learned to deal with many unusual situations during his time as supervisor of the Tongli Family Hospital. Most of them he just put under the header of “Grandma Bau”: the occasional missing corpse, disappearing orderlies, objects moving without visible force, even the somehow common “I loved talking to that old woman; who was she?” He even named his antacid tablets his “Grandma Bau pills” as she was the reason he went through so many.

He put the tea next to the pomegranate on the altar in the corner of his office. He knew they would be gone by the time he left for the evening and would need to be replaced the next morning. That was fine by him; the small sacrifice kept the demonic shenanigans to a minimum, and those that did occur usually worked to the advantage of the hospital: The corpses carried some nasty diseases, the objects were done to entertain children, and it was nice to have someone to console the families. As for the orderlies….he shuddered to think of what they did to get her attention, but the rumors attached to those who disappeared kept everyone on the straight and narrow. Usually.

He smiled; his hospital simply did not have the same inventory problems that other hospitals did, there were far fewer reports of mistreatment of patients, and there were fewer disciplinary issues. Perhaps other hospitals needed their own demons on the payroll.

He bowed to the offering and stood up. He walked to his window. It was a great day to be an administrator.

* * * * *

A tall man in monk garb stood outside the hospital. Haitao stared at the hospital and then slammed the end of his shakujo into the ground in front of its main door, the interlocked rings at its head jangling for a moment afterward. “I know you are in there, demon. Come out and face me.”

“That is not the way to do that.” He spun to see an old woman in a Zhongan suit. He was puzzled: The suit was popular in the Mao era but was now seen almost only in period dramas. “If you are looking for the demon who resides inside, you should offer her some tea.”

He smiled. “You know nothing of the ways of demons, madam.” He glared at her. “Now, begone.” He even shook his shakujo at her for emphasis.

She bowed. “If you are sure.” He nodded. She walked into the hospital.

He watched her disappear. Now he could get serious about summoning the ferocious demon from inside the hospital. He started to slam his shakujo down again but froze, rolled his eyes, and his shoulders slumped.

“I am an idiot.”

He walked away from the hospital, unsure of how to proceed but sure that the demon inside had somehow bested him: After all, he had successfully summoned it but then told it to away because it hadn’t appeared in the form he was expecting to appear in. The demon was obviously far more clever than him.

He was going to need some advice on how to vanquish this demon.

* * * * *

Boss Yulong snored in his hospital bed. He had thought that he was strong as an ox, but it wasn’t bullets, poison, or even explosives that would end up killing him, but his addiction to cigarettes; lung cancer had laid him low. However, he was unlikely to die peacefully: His Tong rivals needed his death to cement their standing and his allies needed his death to hide their secrets. His long career as a crime boss ensured that he would not be seeing the morning.

Two men left a white van. They took their coats off, revealing scrubs underneath. They even had proper identification hanging from their necks. The two muscular men didn’t even look at each other; they knew their roles and had been briefed thoroughly on their mission. They were able to quickly reach the room of the boss; no one questioned two orderlies who walked with purpose and speed. They stopped just long enough to check the room number.

An old woman walked up to them. She wore a Mao suit, adding to her age somehow. She kept her head bowed as she put herself between them and the door. “Are you sure you should be doing this?”

The two men smiled at her. The older turned to her. “Yes, old mother. I am very sure about this. Now please move before we are forced to move you. We do not want to hurt you.”

“I just wanted to make sure that you were committed to your path.” The old woman looked up, exposing her glowing eyes to them. The shadows around her darkened; she grew in stature without adding an inch of actual height.

Two tentacles grew from the shadows surrounding them and slowly surrounded the men. They struggled against the tentacles, but the tentacles covered the men from toe to head. The tentacles squeezed them, crushing their ribcages and suffocating them. The tentacles disappeared into the shadows, taking the bodies with them.

The shadows returned to normal as her eyes returned to their normal brown. She smiled. “Administrator Yuan will be pleased with the lack of mess.” She walked off. “There is only one other detail to contend with.” She walked up to a desk phone and dialed a number. “Your van is ready for pick up.” She put the receiver down and walked down the hall, melding with the shadows as she went, fading further from view with every step.

In the morning, the local Tong would send a man to collect the van. He would find two right hands, one from each of the men, just enough to identify them. Boss Yulong saw three more sunrises. Just hours before the fourth. his body was removed from the room; he had passed in the night while sleeping. There had been no more attacks after the Tong had been reminded that the hospital had something scarier than their most skilled assassin.

* * * * *

The roof was usually empty in the middle of the afternoon as the nurses and others were too busy to take time off. This satisfied her as it gave her some time to enjoy the sun by herself, giving her a chance to warm her scales in the sunlight. True warmth would never be hers; her cold blood would never allow that. She allowed herself a few moments of meditation, allowing her to maximize the effects on her skin.

She knew she would never belong to the world, her sins keeping her apart from it forever. Nonetheless, she did what she could to redeem herself. Sure, there was the path of the monster should she decide to fully embrace that aspect of her, but that limited her to just that aspect of herself. Inspired by the demons Sha Wujing, Zhu Bajie, and Sun Wukong, she knew that she could once again be part of Heaven if she demonstrated her faith. She felt the pain of her existence every moment, even at times like this, but her love for those inside the hospital she now guarded allowed her to deal with that pain.

She looked into the sun, not fearing its brightness. She knew that one day she could be so much brighter.

* * * * *

There were numerous alleys that surrounded the hospital. Through one ran a white fox. Well, more of a huli jing, its nine tails flowing behind it. Haitao was close on its heels.

A box landed on top of the huli jing. While it easily tore through the box, the distraction allowed Haitao to catch up to it. He hit on the head with his prayer beads. It turned to face him. As it did so, two tentacles caught it and flung it upwards. Grandma Bau, surrounded by shadows and eyes glowing, watched the fox spirit as it fell down.

“Quickly, Monk; what do I call you?”

Puzzled, he blurted out, “Haitao.”

She smiled. “Figured, considering you returned.” She became serious. “Haitao, please tell me you have prepared the proper zhuyou for the fox.”

He reached into his robes to pull out a piece of yellowed paper with red writing. “Of course.”

She sighed. “Good. Because you only get one chance at this.” She pointed to a spot just behind her. “Put the zhuyou there.”

He ran over to the spot, placing the talisman as she had said. A mere moment later the fox fell on it, instantly consumed in flame. Nothing was left, not even the paper. Both sighed in relief.

Haitao looked at her as she returned to her mortal seeming. “Thanks for the help.” He shifted to a battle stance. “But you know I must now defeat you.”

She smiled. “I would think you would have preferred a truce. I can be a powerful ally, after all.”

He glared at her. “You know I can’t do that.”

She bowed to him. “I had to give you the chance.” She melted into the shadows.

His jaw dropped. Yet again she had slipped from his grasp. He relaxed his stance. “I seriously need to do some research on that demon.” He walked off.

From the shadows just a few paces from where she had appeared, Grandma Bau suppressed a giggle. I hope he keeps returning; this could be fun. She again melted into the shadows.

* * * * *

Little Mei cried in her incubator. Born a month too early, she was learning already that to live was to suffer. Nurse Hua never knew what to do to make her a little more comfortable, so her youngest charge would cry constantly, usually out of pain. The nurse checked off the rest of her sleeping charges, making sure that they did not need changing and ensuring that they were still breathing.

Something began to claw at her consciousness. She slowly noticed there was a new sound. No. The lack of a sound. There was no crying. She froze as she realized what it meant, then ran over to Little Mei. It took her a moment to realize why the little girl wasn’t crying, and she sighed, relieved.

There was a little wool doll in the infant’s arms.

She allowed herself a smile before returning to her rounds. Thank you, Grandma Bau.

* * * * *

Grandma Bau sipped her tea and munched the seeds of her pomegranate. Her hospital was safe, for now, although tomorrow was another day, a few more steps down her path. She toasted the future with the last sip of her tea and bowed toward the moon. She then put the cup down, grabbed the remains of her pomegranate, and disappeared like a dream.