How to Be Like Thorfinn: Learning to Live Without Enemies

Let’s talk—man to man, person to person. Life throws a lot at us. People wrong us. Circumstances beat us down. We feel anger, resentment, jealousy, and sometimes we want to fight back. But what if the strongest thing you could do wasn’t to retaliate—but to forgive? That’s what Vinland Saga’s Thorfinn teaches us, not just through words, but through a journey so raw and human it might contain the greatest scene in all of fiction.

The Turning Point: "I Have No Enemies"

Thorfinn didn’t start as a peaceful man. His early life was steeped in vengeance, chasing Askeladd to avenge his father, Thor's. But the transformation begins not in the iconic episode 21, but all the way back in episode 9—when Askeladd, standing above a pit of warriors tearing each other apart, tells Thorfinn, *"Everyone is your enemy."*

That moment isn’t just a warning about battle—it’s a mirror for how we live. Think about how often you judge someone silently, how quickly you dismiss, resent, or envy others. Worse still, think about how often you're harsh with yourself. We live in that pit, making enemies not just of others, but of ourselves.

The Escape: Change Your View

So how do you escape? According to Thorfinn’s journey, it’s simpler than you think: stop seeing others as enemies. That doesn’t mean you let people walk over you or tolerate harm—but it means choosing kindness first. Something incredible happens when you make that shift: when you start seeing good in others, you’ll slowly start to see it in yourself. Because kindness, like cruelty, is a habit—and habits reshape how we see the world.

As Askeladd says, taunting Thorfinn's self-pity with “*me me me me,*” he forces him to open his eyes—to all the people Thorfinn has dragged into his own pit of hatred. It’s a haunting metaphor for the lives many of us live. When you make others your enemies, even without realizing it, they pull you down. But when you choose to see others differently, the climb out begins.

The Climb: Fight the Right Battles

When Thorfinn begins his climb—his journey toward peace—it isn’t clean. It isn’t easy. Askeladd tells him, *“Climb, leave them dangling on you and climb.”* There will always be people trying to pull you back into anger. Some will say the wrong thing. Some will betray you. But that doesn’t mean you respond in kind. You respond by staying the course.

And that’s where the concept of the “real battle” comes in. Your real battle isn’t revenge, it isn’t proving yourself to someone who doesn’t care—it’s the long, quiet fight to become a better version of yourself. Thorfinn finds that by helping others, atoning for the past, and choosing peace over conflict.

For many of us, that real battle could be going to the gym, working on a passion, pursuing a goal that gives our lives meaning. When you're locked into your real battle, the little slights, petty conflicts, and jealousies fade. They become background noise.

The Greatest Scene in Fiction

All of this culminates in episode 21, where Thorfinn walks into the battlefield—not with a sword, but with resolve. He tells the guards he wants to see the king. They mock him, punch him, beat him. And he lets them. He doesn't resist. Not because he’s weak, but because he’s **done fighting for the wrong reasons**.

He stands after a hundred punches, bruised but unbroken, and says the words that define not just his character, but a philosophy:

“I have no enemies.”

When asked why he didn’t fight back, his answer cuts deeper than any blade: *“I meet you men for the first time today. I know nothing about you, nor do I bear any grudges. You are not my enemies.”*

Let that sink in.

Info Source: "I have no enemies" (Thorfinn - Vinland Saga)

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What It Means for Us

You probably won’t find yourself facing a hundred punches to get a message across. But you *will* face daily decisions about how you treat others and yourself. You *will* be tempted to carry grudges, to seek petty revenge, to let bitterness win.

You don’t have to.

It takes just one act of kindness, one choice to respond with understanding instead of anger, to change the dynamic. And if the other person doesn’t change? That’s not your responsibility. Your power lies in **how you respond**, not in controlling the outcome.

As Thors once said, *“A true warrior needs no sword.”* It takes enormous strength to choose peace. Be that strong.

• So how do you become like Thorfinn?
• Stop making enemies—especially in your mind.
• Choose kindness, even when it’s hard.
• Climb, even when others try to pull you down.
• Focus on your real battle, not pointless fights.
• Be the one to extend a hand, not draw a sword.

Because in the end, the ones who refuse to fight for hate are the only ones strong enough to win the battle for peace.