Friends, HIMYM, & New Girl

Rachel, Robin & Jess

The Main Character

These are the main characters of their respective shows, yes they are all ensemble casts but the show simply wouldn’t exist without these 3. All of the other characters' actions and main storylines are set into motion with the introduction of these women and the progression of any story or character growth is contingent upon their existence.

Rachel and Ross, Ross and Rachel a couple that has been immortalized by millennials that didn't get enough therapy. Ross often gets the short end of the stick in discussions about this relationship because for some reason we all agreed to ignore all of Rachel’s shitty actions. So here we go, let's start with her wild overreaction to Ross’ pro/con list. Look I get that some of you are super level headed and allow yourselves to just float through life but some of us need to outwardly work through our thought process. A pro/con list is quite reasonable ESPECIALLY when you are talking about whether or not to dump someone. See it wasn’t just about her, it was also about Julie who he was already in a relationship with. His decision affects her too, so it's better to not just gut react and actually think your life through. Rachel overreacted and absolutely no one can convince me otherwise. Then they actually get together and this bitch dismisses his concerns at every turn. As a partner you are not responsible for your significant others insecurities but you are absolutely responsible for not making them worse. Ross expressed his concerns over her and Mark working together and she basically told him to get over it in response, then she went out of her way to spend time with him outside of work, she hugged him first when she got the job and blew off her boyfriend to go to lunch with him on the first day…shit partner behavior. And then she breaks up with him, very clearly breaks up with him. She tells Monica they broke up, she tells Ross’ answering machine they broke up, then she asks Ross if she can be his girlfriend again…meaning she was at the moment NOT his girlfriend AND THEN she gaslights him, her friends and the audience into thinking he cheated on her, when he for sure did not. People get irritated with the “we were on a break” jokes but if I repeatedly got called a cheater I would want that corrected as well. Well then she goes on a date with Mark, confirming Ross’ insecurities and acting like nothing is wrong with that. Ross finally moves on and is getting married and she flies to London with the sole purpose of breaking up his relationship and then has the audacity to be mad at Ross when he tells her that Emily doesn’t want him to see her anymore and he chose his wife….girl. And then she dates Joey, who Ross has stated is his best friend…bad on both of them. Dating the best friend is a trashy move, especially considering that when he went on a single date with her sister she flipped out on him (after granting them permission in the first place). She’s selfish and an absolutely horrible partner.

Robin and Ted never should have happened, they definitely shouldn’t have happened again and again but here we are. Now Robin knew from the very beginning of this relationship that Ted wanted to settle down and get married, and have kids. And she also knew from before he even came into her life that she did not want those things, and yet they entertained a relationship anyway. She constantly strung him along KNOWING that she was never going to want the things that he did, she just kept letting him come back to her with no thought at all to how she knew it would end. She is also a selfish, terrible partner.

Jess and Nick were the best friends into lovers relationship, however similar to Robin their intital break up was inevitable and seh had to have known that already. At the time Jess and Nick had gotten together, Jess had lived with the boys for a while already and she knew that Nick was irresponsible and childish and incapable of taking care of himself and that he was kind of a conspiracy theorist, I think it's kind of ridiculous that they couldn’t live together when she knew all those things already. Also if you can’t stand living in the same space as your partner because they live so gross that you can’t handle it…don’t be in a relationship with that person. Needing your own space because you get overstimulated or you don’t sleep well with others is one thing, needing your own space because your partners entire personality bothers you is another. They really didn’t fit together well, and honestly she was more of a mother then a girlfriend. They weren’t partners, he was always unable to care for himself. Their relationship isn’t cute or sweet, it's a massive problem.

Rachel and Paulo, honestly in this “relationship” she was just stupid. She meets a guy in a blackout that she thinks is hot but she can’t actually communicate with, that's a fuck buddy not a relationship. Forcing it into monogamy when I am 100% positive that you never had that conversation due a massive language barrier just makes you look dumb. Cause guess what, no conversation = no commitment, so Paulo didn’t cheat on her either. Making a move on her friend was skeezy but it wasn’t cheating. Basically Rachel is just a moron.

Robin and Barney I really don’t have anything to say outside of what I already said when discussing Barney’s relationship. They were the best suited for each other and I think their breakup and divorce was a shit writing decision.

Jess and Sam graduated from friends with benefits to an actual relationship but not without bumps in the road. I think all of us who feel all of our feelings all the time go through a phase where we think we can sleep around without catching feelings but I think deep down we all know we’re lying to ourselves. And that’s why when Jess caught feelings I think the only thing she did wrong was ask for more when Sam had made it clear that he wanted to keep it casual, you’re just hurting yourself at that point. That said they do end up dating and then Nick kisses Jess, now I do not consider this cheating as she was not the instigator, yet this did cause them to break up. Nick really shook Jess with that first kiss. So these two break up, and then they get back together…again later. I loved the reality of the writing in this relationship, the back and forth was very realistic and it was very grounded. Jess and Sam actually worked very well together but of course something else gets in the way, Sam reconnects with the one that got away. Jess has a hard time but she decides to let him go. I really loved them together, now the only thing that really needs to be addressed about this relationship is that Sam does take out a restraining order against Jess, and she ignores it…That is problematic for many reasons. I think a lot of Jess’ boundary issues are played off as quirky but it's not cute it's literally illegal in this case.

Rachel and Barry, this relationship proves once again that Rachel sucks. So she leaves him at the altar, which all by itself shows how selfish she is. It also shows how bad her communication skills are, because you’re really telling me that she didn’t have any of these feelings until the wedding day? She couldn’t be bothered to have a conversation with him, and just ran? Yeah that’s ridiculous. Then she finds out he’s sleeping with her best friend and they get engaged AND THEN she goes back to Barry. She knowingly sleeps with an engaged man. I have said it before and I’ll say it 12,000 more times, if you knowingly flirt with, hit on, or sleep with someone in a relationship YOU ARE TRASH. Rachel proves not only to be a garbage partner but a garbage person.

Robin and Kevin; Well Robin sleeps with her therapist, do I really need to list all the reasons why that is batshit crazy? If you need therapy so bad you start sleeping with your therapist you need some serious help. And then there's the fact that she cheats on him with Barney, a relationship that’s failed once. And then she stays with Kevin without telling him what happened with Barney. So she cheats and then she lies…bad person behavior.

The first real relationship we see for Jess is Jess and Paul, they break up because he fell in love hard and Jess wasn’t there yet and he couldn’t handle it. She really didn’t do anything wrong, this was her getting back on her feet relationship, after she was cheated on. Of these three women, Jess is really the only one that isn’t a bad person.

Now we’ve established that these women are the catalysts for the respective storylines, they are mostly driven by their bad decisions. With Jess it's mostly cute and chaotic, and with the other two it's just stupidity and selfishness.