Comfort Shows: An Amateur's Guide

I'll start this with a confession: I rarely watch new shows. As a sufferer of anxiety and depression, I rarely can or want to get stuck into something new, often using TV as background noise for writing, or scrolling through social media (confession #2: it's almost always the latter). As I type this, the TV is blaring out season 9 episode 20 of The Big Bang Theory. Have I watched this show umpteen times? Yes. Am I paying much attention to what's going on? No. Am I going to keep it on anyway? Hell yes.

There's something calming about going back to the same shows over and over again. It's like spending the evening with friends but not actually having to socialise. Despite watching most of these shows for the first time in my twenties - I'm hanging in there having just passed my 29th birthday! - there's an element of nostalgia when tuning into an episode of a series you've watched repeatedly, containing characters you've watched so often you feel like you actually know them.

So, if you're looking for comfort shows, here's my recommended list.

• The Big Bang Theory

• How I Met Your Mother

• Brooklyn 99

• The Office (US)

• Friends

If you enjoy one of these series, odds are you'll enjoy them all, and that's because they all contain familiar tropes. The series that's least like the others is currently Brooklyn 99, but the show is still ongoing, so I'm sure any tropes we see in the others will come to light soon!

Note: there will be mild spoilers in the rest of this article!

They're all comedies that touch on serious themes.

As you probably already know, all these series are comedies. They're filled with one-liners, hilarious situations and dramatic yet comedic themes. However, they also tackle a lot of important issues, such as death, unemployment, and trust. They are all light-hearted, enjoyable shows to watch, with just enough seriousness to keep them from being too silly or unrealistic.

The friends/workers who spend all their time together.

In each of these series, we meet a group of 6-10 friends or colleagues who spend an inordinate amount of time together. Of course, we don't see the day to day lives of these characters, just the interesting things, but they all seem to spend most of their lives in each other's company, often in a staple place (university, bar, police department, office, coffee house). There's something comforting about watching a group of people who, despite their different personalities and frequent bickering, have each other’s backs.

The group's stable couple...

They may take longer to get together in some shows than others, but each of these series contains one solid couple that started out friends (apart from HIMYM, although even Marshall and Lily spent some time as just friends!). Each couple faces adversity, and may occasionally clash, but eventually they come together and are contentedly, undramatically in a relationship. While Jake and Amy (B99) don't get together straight away, once they are together their relationship is uncomplicated and happy. It took Monica and Chandler (F) a while, but once they got there, there was no doubting their relationship! Watching that certainty of love makes single people hopeful for the future and couples strive to make each other that happy (Jim and Pam 4eva <3).

…and the group's turbulent couple.

There is always a Ross and Rachel in a comfort show. The couple that always finds their way back to each other, overcoming obstacles, breaking each other’s hearts, and then having a tearful, romantic reunion. This is a classic 'love conquers all' moment and it fills an anxious heart with hope. We see this twice in HIMYM, first when Robin marries Barney, then in the finale when Ted takes the blue French horn to Robin's apartment. The only show I have yet to see this in is Brooklyn 99 (unless you count Charles's major crush on Rosa at the beginning), but the next season comes out in about a week, so you never know!

The bad luck magnet.

There's always at least one person in every group who has terrible luck, or has drama follow them around. In Friends, it's Ross; in HIMYM, it's Ted (or possibly Barney, his antics certainly cause strange circumstances); in TBBT, it's Howard (clean room anyone? Space?); in Brooklyn 99, it's Charles; and in The Office, it's Michael (then once he's left, Andy). Bad things seem to just happen to these guys, and while it's amusing, I also feel a bit sorry for them, which ultimately makes me feel a bit better about myself!

The mean "badass".

A bad luck magnet is often a lovable goof, but there's also always a mean one in the group. They're cool, they're tough, they don't care if someone tries to hurt their feelings and they rarely show emotion. This makes things even more shocking when they do and underscores the seriousness of what's happening.

Phoebe (F) was homeless and used to mug people, so the tenderness of her holding the triplets she carried is that bit more emotional. Sheldon (TBBT) prides himself in having control of his emotions, so seeing his Nobel Prize speech had me in tears as he acknowledged everything his friends had done for him. Robin (HIMYM) grew up thinking she needed to be tough, so every time she cries, I have a major sympathy spike. Who didn't get choked up when Dwight (TO) proposed to Angela at the side of the road with the ring from his grandmother's buttocks? And of course, even seeing Rosa (B99) smile is surprising.

The great thing about these characters is that, while we may wish we were like them, they are not immune to emotions. In those softer moments, I felt a real connection with all these characters that I love to revisit.

Someone has a baby in unconventional or accidental circumstances.

In groups of friends where everyone is dating everyone, it is unsurprising that someone ends up pregnant. What's interesting about these comfort shows is that the pregnancy is never straightforward or ordinary. There's always an extenuating circumstance, or an unexpected positive test, or some kind of drama.

Friends certainly went for it on the unconventional baby trope: Ross's son Ben has two mothers, Phoebe carried triplets as a surrogate for her brother and his wife, Rachel got pregnant from a one-night stand, and Monica and Chandler's twins were adopted.

In TBBT, while Bernadette and Howard's first child was a nice but altogether uneventful story line, their second child was a complete surprise; Bernadette finds out she's pregnant when Halley is only four months old. In the season finale, we find out that Penny is also accidentally pregnant. This was bittersweet for me as I was happy they were having a baby but also unhappy that the writers didn't just let Penny not have kids like she wanted. This would have been a great message for women across the world that it's okay to not want children. However, that's a rant for another time.

I digress. Jim and Pam's (TO) first child was also a surprise; Pam was five months pregnant at their wedding. Angela's baby was the result of her affair with Dwight while she was married to the senator, who we find out early on is gay. While Angela and Dwight do end up together, their child's conception is definitely not conventional.

Even for Marshall and Lily in HIMYM, who were actively trying for a baby, their pregnancy story was surrounded by the tragedy of Marshall's father's death and the drama of Marshall trying to get a new job. Then when we find out Lily is pregnant again, this story is wrapped up in the chaos of them deciding whether to move to Italy.

Again, Brooklyn 99 stands out as a series that does not contain this trope, but I would be willing to bet money that the next series involves at least one pregnancy (looking at you, Amy!).

In life, there is a lot of pressure to have a baby at "the right time", but all of these series show that even in less-than-ideal circumstances, having a child is a wonderful thing, especially when you have the love and support of your friends.

Ultimately, if you like one of these shows, then you will probably like all of them. They can be enjoyed time and time again, and while some jokes may not necessarily age well (remember, Friends aired 1994-2004), they all provide comfort, laughter, and nostalgia. Just try to throw in some other shows from time to time so you don't drive your spouse crazy (sorry, Ben!)