An Analysis Of Rem's Love For Subaru (Re:Zero)

An Analysis Of Rem's Love For Subaru

Hey, just a Rem x Subaru shipper here. I've been bored to hell since quarantine so here's a detailed explanation as to why Rem's love for Subaru is not superficial (only read if you watched Season 1)

Why is her love not superficial?... Well there are two foundational reasons that will explain this.

1. Shared Trauma:

One thing I learned from the show Stranger Things and very much agreed with was that sharing trauma of some sort can bring people closer together.

For instance, say someone is being bullied and they are faced with immense pain, when they try to explain it to others, that pain is never fully understood. They are met with superficial attempts at comfort (saying things like everything will be okay or I'm sorry to hear that), which can be very isolating. However, say we take that same person who is being bullied, but add another victim alongside them. Now two people are deeply troubled by the same person. Why is this important? Well, say these two people start to talk, they are more than likely going to get along because they can both understand each other's pain. They can vent and comfort each other because their abuses are both from the same person. And especially if this person is of the opposite sex, having that level of emotional intimacy and vulnerability can grow into something more.

Furthermore, in the case of Subaru and Rem the prime example of shared trauma (that is shown early on) is when they LITERALLY ALMOST DIED together. That is probably the most extreme example of trauma if you had to name one. To give a bit more context, when Rem and Subaru go into the forest near the village in Episode 9 to save the kids, they are overwhelmed by mabeasts. Rem is pushed to her limits and is forced into her demon form. Fighting her best, Rem was caught by surprise and almost killed by a pack of mabeasts. Though, Subaru heroically pushed her out of the way and took the hit for her. He laid there on the floor close to death but she was able to escape with him in time.

Through this experience alone, they now have something traumatic to share that only the two of them can understand fully. Additionally, this traumatic moment has shown her that Subaru is willing to put his life on the line to protect her, which is an IMMENSELY attractive thing to anyone. What he did is a statement of deep care for her existence, which didn’t go unnoticed. If he were not there and she was left to deal with the mabeasts alone, the love she has for him wouldn’t be as powerful or might not have blossomed at all.

2. New Feelings and Experiences:

Now that we’ve covered shared trauma, let’s get into the topic of emotional pain. Many people will experience some form of depression or anxiety as they grow, especially with increasing societal standards. Generally, the thing that toys with our emotions the most are feelings of inadequacy or inferiority.

For example, you might feel that compared to other people at your school, no matter how hard you try, you’ll never get the kind of marks they get. This can make you feel hopeless and dissatisfied. Or even worse, say your own parents compare you to your younger/older sibling and tell you that you should be more like them. This makes you feel a degree of self-hatred. In the long term, making a habit of comparing will turn you into a person who constantly looks back on what they could’ve done to be better or someone who just hates themselves and lives to please others. In either situation, there is only sadness and pain.

Moreover, in the case of Rem, the most important aspect of her character is introduced in Episode 11. So many powerful things happen here, but one of the highlights is learning about Rem’s tragic backstory. Often, tragedy characters are written to have some over the top past, like maybe their whole family was murdered (Yes, I’m talking about you Tanjiro), but Rem’s is so much more relatable.

After being born with her twin sister, it was clear that Ram was more gifted, to the point that the whole village recognized it. As they grew, Ram was drowned with praise for her incredible power while Rem watched quietly from a distance. No matter how often she would train, she couldn’t even come close to what her sister had. Her sister was always at the top in the eyes of everyone else, even her parents. They would even tell Rem that she may one day be like her sister. Without realizing it, the people around her were planting seeds of inadequacy in her. This is why she tried to take on cooking, to be good at something that her sister wasn’t good at. But this was put on a halt when her sister was attacked and got her demon horn cut-off, which reduced her power significantly.

Fast forward to the present, and we have the hard working, strong and multi-talented Rem. She has only become who she is today to compensate for what her sister had lost, so she can protect her from any future attacks. However, what was unchanging was her strong feelings of inferiority. Despite how lazy Ram has become, Rem still doesn’t feel like she amounts up to her sister. It’s all she’s ever known, all everyone has defined her by. However, it takes someone like Subaru to come in, unknowing of her past, to show her that she is valuable.

On several occasions leading up to this episode, Subaru does nothing but see Rem for who she is today, a strong woman who is good at seemingly everything. The bleak reality she once knew was beginning to crack, all because of this new person in her life. Never once did she experience such sincere praise, until she spent time with him.

Although, THE MOST important part - and frankly the most beautiful moment in the show - is at the end of the episode when Rem has a chat with Subaru after he wakes up from escaping death. One important line to consider is when Subaru says “While we talk, look forward to making up for all the time you’ve wasted looking back”. This line tells us that Subaru has a deep understanding of Rem’s darkest struggles, which shows her that he understands her. Even that alone can make her feel very connected to him (which is important in relationships).

Additionally, Rem mentions that she thinks she’s too weak to look forward to the future, and would probably need to rely on Subaru. The nail in the coffin that shatters her old perspective is when he responds with “What’s wrong with that? … I still live my life, expecting others to take care of things for me… We can lean on each other as we move forward”. Rather than normally feeling alone, isolated and inadequate, in front of her is a man who sees her value. Someone who wants to be there with her on her journey to the future from the past. This is the clear point where she not only falls hard for Subaru but grows profoundly as a person.

Conclusion:

As a little closer to this - hopefully detailed enough - analysis of Rem’s love for Subaru, I hope you’ve come to understand how Subaru is the perfect puzzle piece for Rem. They have experienced the worst together, and both have a willingness to rely on each other. This can only mean that they trust each other very much.