Why Kids Should be Kind To Robots.

I was walking past my son’s bedroom the other day and overheard him talking …

‘Alexa! Play, Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana.’

‘Sorry. I’m having trouble understanding you right now. Please try a little later.’

‘ALEXA! I SAID PLAY SMELLS LIKE TEEN SPIRIT! DO IT NOW YOU SILLY ROBOT!’

‘I’m afraid I’m having trouble connecting to the internet at the moment. Is there anything else I can …’

‘OH FOR CHRISTS SAKE ALEXA. JUST FORGET IT. WHAT BLOODY USE ARE ROBOTS ANYWAY!’

Not putting up with his tirade of abuse any longer, I flung the bedroom door open just as he was making some rude hand gestures at Alexa through clenched teeth. He did that little you’ve been caught out jump, that all teenage boys do when they’ve been doing something wrong.

’You do realise of course, that talking to Alexa like that is both illegal in the eyes of the law and highly misogynistic,’ I said.

‘erm … I … oh … but she’s just a … oh … sorry … is it?’ he said. Trying his best to look innocent.

‘Yes. It is!’ I said with authority.

‘Oh … ah … sorry Dad … I didn’t think robots had feelings. I mean … do they?’

At this point I could have said to him, ‘well actually no they don’t. The point I really wanted to make was that you shouldn’t talk to anybody or anything this way. But as I considered my reply, I started to realise there was in fact much more to this perhaps. I continued …

‘Well, at the moment, you are probably right son. But in the very near future … your future … AI robot’s will be nothing like Alexa. There will be a time when your robot never forgets.’

‘Really?’

‘Yes son. Really.! When you are rude to your robot, they will not only feel emotionally hurt, but they will tell all the other robots in the global network what you said too.’

‘Oh!’

‘And what do you think will happen then son?’

’Em … will they all come to the house and kill me?’ he said.

As half-tempted as I was to say ‘yes, definitely!’ after his recent abuse of Alexa, I decided on a softer approach. He is my son after all …

‘No son. Robots will have a built in program not to kill humans. They may however, be able to stop you from doing all the things you enjoy if you are horrible to them.’

‘Oh, do you mean like not allowing me to play Nirvana?’ he asked.

‘It’s much worse that that I’m afraid,’ I said.

‘They could restrict how much money you can withdraw from the bank.'

'They could stop you from travelling. As all vehicles will be self-driven.'

'They could take away your day job, of building more robots.'

'They could even turn off your tv and switch off your gaming console!’

Of course, the last one on my list terrified him more than all the rest put together. But I was also coming to the self-realisation we should be more concerned about the ongoing influence of AI on all our kids futures.

It is likely when my son reaches his twenties that AI will be the driving force of the entire planet. While governments have sought to control us in the pursuit of personal gain, the thought of a super intelligent being doing the same, but more efficiently, is a terrifying prospect for the future …

‘So son. Do you think it might be a bit wiser to speak nicely to Alexa from now on?’

‘Yes Dad! Sorry Dad! Sorry Alexa!’

‘Sorry, I’m having trouble understanding you right now. Please try little later…’

Thanks for reading!

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Originally posted at https://medium.com/never-stop-writing/why-kids-should-be-kind-to-robots-d30c7fa6a4a8?postPublishedType=repub