Cacotopia

No louder than a whisper, a sobbing sound emanates from my brother’s room, a room that had been empty for six years. I am not sure what compels me to open the door, bravery is not something for which I am known. I am a steadfast, compliant person who lives for the future. I play the long game like my mother had, the opposite of my older brother and father.

My finger trembles while punching in the code, a green light flashes when the door slides open. Instantly there is silence, mixed with stale air. The beating within my chest is so strong my eyeballs vibrate, causing a strobe like effect when I peer into the room.

In the evening shadows, I see him sitting on the edge of his bed. At first glance, he still looks like the angry twenty-one-year-old who stormed out of our life years before, even though he was closer to thirty-five, the same age I am now. Like many people he spent his assigned credits keeping himself young, partying and traveling the world. Yet as I entered the room, it became evident that he halted his treatment. He looks older than I had first thought, still younger looking than me, but soon he will appear his actual age of forty-one.

Speaking softly so as not to startle him, I say. “Randall?”

Along with pain I notice something else in his eyes as he smiles. “Brother.”

Standing, he dominates the room with his presence. While I am gifted with brains and average looks, he is taller and extremely handsome. I understand why he chose to remain young for as long as possible. Without warning he embraces me, and I find myself hugging him back.

Just as quickly he breaks away, his eyes making contact with everything but me. “My room looks the same.”

“Mother asked me to leave it. It’s been untouched since the day she died.”

“Of course. Was that a stipulation in her will, when she gave you our home?”

“One of them, yes.”

Walking to the window he stares out. “I’ve traveled all over the world and been to exotic locations, yet the view from here is unmatched. “

It is true. Unlike our father, mother didn’t spend her allotted government credits until later in life. She chose a profession, and worked until she could afford this place. Then she indulged herself. Living in comfort, high above the bustling metropolis. From here we see the pulse of the city. Clear tubes transferring people about their day-to-day duties, airships taking off to various places in the world, all this framed within the beauties of the distant snowcapped mountains.

“Mom didn’t waste her credits.”

If the jab hurt him, he didn’t show it. “A lot of good that did her.”

Instead of responding to his statement, I ask. “How have you been, you look good.”

He laughs. “You never were a good liar. I’ve decided to save my remaining credits for the future. It’s time for me to grow up, besides the treatments are costly.”

“Sorry to hear that.”

“Don’t be sorry for me Jaxon, I lived a wonderful life, seen things you can only imagine and been with some of the most beautiful women that grace this world. I am ready to become an adult, like my little brother.”

I suddenly felt relief and smile. “That’s awesome Randall, you’re still young, at least you still look young… for now. What do you have planned?”

“Well. I opted out of extra schooling and declined to become a laborer. I was hoping to stay here, you know until I figure my life out.”

“Of course. But I need to ask if there is something I should know?

“No.” His reply was too quick.

The silence hung heavy like the burden of guilt my brother was trying to hide.

“Randall how many credits do you have left?”

Turning away, he mumbles incoherently. Grabbing him by the shoulders I force him to look at me, it is there I see what I feared. His credit eye reveals the truth.

When we turn eighteen the government gives every person a one-time gift of enough assistance credits to live a basic life. A chip implanted in the eye is your account, a simple retinal scan working like a credit card lets you use the credits as needed. You cannot lose it, no one can steal your credits. It is attached to you.

Carefully used it should last the average person up to the age of sixty five. However, once your credits are depleted, so is your time on earth. When that happens, you become a burden to society and branded a fugitive and once caught disappear forever.

There are three groups of people: those who choose to work and earn more credits, resulting in a comfortable and longer life. Another group that chooses never to work and live modestly in government assisted housing. Then there are those like my father and Randall who use the credits to live a life of indulgence until it runs out.

Almost everyone at one time in their life will purchase the age halting treatment which can last up to fifteen years. Expensive but life altering. Again, there are three groups of people. First group receives it immediately, wishing to stay young for as long as they can. Most get treatment in their thirties. The third group, the working people, of which I belong. We wait until we have secured extra credits. Actually, there is one more group, the ones who never receive treatment and live out their natural lives or die before they use it. Our mother was in this group.

A segment of your pupil changes color with every withdrawal, until there is nothing left but red. His right pupil was glowing like a whore house of old, Randall was out of credits.

“How did you manage to burn through a lifetime of credits?”

I already knew the answer, he was not the first and will not be the last. Until the government regulates a monthly allowance. Knowing that there are those who cannot handle money correctly. I heard that when there were still million-dollar lotteries, back before gambling was outlawed. Many winners went bankrupt. Wealth that should have lasted their entire lifetime, gone within five years.

People don’t change.

“You know the law Randall, you can’t run. You have no job, and no way to earn more credits. You’re now considered a burden to society. They’re going to make you take the final walk. You forfeited your life for a good time.”

“I just need a place to lie low, until I figure something out. Unless you turn me in.”

Runners always get caught, mostly because of the reward of additional credits. Family members have been known to turn on their own for the reward. Then again, they deduct half of your credits if you are caught harboring a fugitive.

“Randall, I have a family.”

He wasn’t panicking or pleading just staring at me. I then realized what he wanted and began shaking my head. “No.”

“What do you mean? I know mom left you this house, and her remaining credits. All I want is my share.”

“She gifted her credits to my children. They are not mine to give.”

“Then sell the house and give me the money. You have your own cash and your credits to live on.”

That selfish comment made me shake. “And where would my family live, in the assisted quarters? Crammed into a two-room apartment. I worked and saved. We never had a holiday, or indulged in frivolous adventures. I sacrificed my youth. I took care of mother when she got sick, I took care of her as she lay dying. Where were you?”

“Brother, they will force me to take the walk.”

“You knew the rules, yet you chose to ignore them, I haven’t seen you in years and hardly at all before that. Now I should suffer?”

“Jaxon…”

“No. You have never worked a day in your life, if I give you money you will spend that and then you will be back here again begging me to give you my children’s savings. No, it is time for me and my family to live the life we worked for, I want the treatment. Don’t ask me to give that up.”

Before he replies, a voice calls out. “Daddy?”

Standing in the doorway, her tiny body silhouetted against the hall light, my daughter repeats. Daddy?”

I pick her up and hold her tight. She tucks her head into the crook of my neck. Lifting her head and rubbing her eyes she says. “Who’s that?”

Suddenly we are interrupted once more this time by my wife, holding our youngest in her arms. “Leila, what are you doing here…I’m sorry Jax…” Kaily pauses as she realizes there is someone in the room we normally keep locked. Staring at me she asks “Jax, what is going on?”

“It’s okay, this is my brother. Randall, this is my wife Kaily, your niece Leila and the little one is Darrius.

No one moves until Leila squirms out of my arms and walks to Randall.

“Who are you?”

Randall nods. “I guess I am your uncle.”

With that, Leila squeals with delight and hugs him. “Are you staying here? We aren’t allowed in this room, daddy says it belongs to Uncle Randall, and that’s you.”

We all find ourselves on the bed, talking. Soon the children snuggle asleep in the hollow of Randalls arms. This was the reason the room was untouched. For this moment when we would be reunited. However, it didn’t change the fact my brother is wanted, a felon and running from the law.

The first rays of light stole into the room, adding a glow of hope to an otherwise miserable situation. For the first time that night the room became silent, an awareness of our fragile existence filled the emptiness.

Gathering the children, Kaily says. “I’ll leave you two alone.”

My words reach his ears at the same time my hand touches his arm. “Randall, I’m not sure how we can fix this.”

I watch his shoulders drop from exhaustion. He scans the room as if seeing it for the first time. “I’d like to wash up, if that is okay.”

“Sure.” It is a deception of the mind, watching one who looks so young, walk like an old man.

When Randall returns, he remains outside, I see a smile on his face like he was finally happy. Then I noticed my cell phone in his hand. What he says next steals my breath.

“I called the authorities. They will be here soon. “

He sees the panic in my face. “Don’t worry I pretended I was you. You’ll get the reward.”

“No, I was wrong. Randall you can stay we will work something out.”

“Jaxson, it is me who was wrong, I should never have endangered you and your family. Your right, I would just blow it all in less than a year. I ask only one thing.”

“What’s that?”

"Can you bring the children and Kaily back. I would like to be with my family until they arrive."

“Of course, brother.”

Cacotopia - a synonym for dystopia, meaning an imagined society or world in which everything is bad or unpleasant, depending on your view.