What is BDSM?

Before I go into detail I am going to mention now the BDSM lifestyle isn't for everyone. Do not read further if it makes you uncomfortable or isn't something you are into. BDSM is an acronym for Bondage, Dominance, Sadism and Masochism. In a BDSM relationship there is a submissive and a dominant/dominatrix. Some couples switch off between these roles and these roles can be fulfilled by a male or female.

The role of a submissive is to completely give yourself and your body to your dominant/dominatrix with absolute trust. If a submissive does not have a trusting relationship, then this cannot be achieved. Trust is extremely important in relationships to begin with but, with a BDSM lifestyle trust is key. A submissive is someone that wants to be controlled and told what to do. Some subs have been through some kind of emotional or physical trauma and deal with it in their intimate relationships. It is something very difficult to explain to someone who doesn't completely understand a BDSM lifestyle. Some subs enjoy being spanked, told they are bad, being choked, having their hair pulled, etc. Sometimes things go to different extremes it just depends how far you are willing to go and what you are into.

The role of a dominant/dominatrix is to care for their submissive. This means giving them a reason to strongly trust their dominant/dominatrix so the submissive is trusting and comfortable giving themselves to their dom. If a dominant/dominatrix does not do what you are comfortable with this cannot be achieved. As I mentioned, trust is key in a BDSM relationship/lifestyle. The dominant/dominatrix's job is to please their submissive and fulfill their needs while also controlling them and testing their limits. There are also different roles involved with dominants/dominatrix. Some people are often made uncomfortable with the thought of hearing that a person is willing to give themselves completely to another person in the bedroom. Some people live the lifestyle constantly and for others it is just something for the bedroom.

A common role between a male and female is called "Daddydom and Babygirl". Some people instantly hear this title and instantly judge the idea. It isn't honestly what it sounds like. These roles are usually fulfilled by someone who had issues with their father growing up or were abused. It does not mean that this is a relationship between father and daughter. Many assume this but, this isn't the case. A "Daddydom and Babygirl" relationship is just something to make the Babygirl feel loved and cared for and build a relationship she was never truly able to have prior.

Many people also like to assume that BDSM is only for people that either have mental issues of some sort or have been through a traumatic experience. BDSM is not for everyone but, if your marriage or relationship needs something new it is definitely something interesting to try at least once. Who knows? Maybe you will try it and find that you love it! Plus, the more you do it I believe the more someone who has not tried it would understand a lot more. It is something that you just will not or cannot know until you try it. If it is not for you though, that is also fine.

To some it up their are many different kinks and fetishes that people have. BDSM is actually at the top of the list ever since the popular book series 'Fifty Shades of Grey'. This kink has been around for much longer and there are many ins and outs to this kind of relationship. To have a BDSM relationship you must both set boundaries of what you are and are not willing to do. Always remember to agree on what you both do and have a "safe word"! For those of you that made it to the end of the article I hope you enjoyed it and stay safe when practicing your kinks and fetishes.