The Bishop's Daughter

Tabbie buries her face in her hands, trying to clear the memory from her head. After carrying it alone for a week, she felt like she was walking around with a time bomb in her head. How many conversations had she had with her parents over the last week? How many new details would it take before Tabbie was so overwhelmed that she just breaks? Every conversation brought out more excuses, more demands for forgiveness. There was constantly some justification for breaching church rules, and it was starting to make Tabbie feel crazy. There's a slight knock at the door, and the door cracks open. Elder Knight steps through the threshold, looking at Tabbie in concern.

"Hey, you alright? Need some company?" he asks her. She sniffles as she wipes her face, patting the seat next to her.

"Yea, I'm okay. Maybe a slight crisis of faith, but nothing major." Tabbie tells him with a halfhearted smile. He takes a seat next to her, his brow furrowed with worry.

"A crisis of faith sounds pretty major to me." Elder Knight tells her. She looks at him, rolling her eyes as she composes herself.

"Well, yea, you're a missionary. Faith is pretty much your whole job," she quips back at him. "I'm just the Bishop's daughter. You know, the pure, perfect sheep blindly following her father's every word, regardless of whether he's lying." Tabbie says, scoffing at herself.

"What is he lying about?" asks Elder Knight, leaning forward in his seat. Tabbie shakes her head.

"I can't get into that. I just… We get told from the very start that we're meant to be virtuous, that sex is a sacred practice between husband and wife. I don't know what to believe right now." Tabbie leans forward, resting her face in her hands. Elder Knight places his hand on her back. "They make it seem like, as long as you have a good enough reason, what do church rules matter? You can just say sorry, I had a good reason, and it all just goes away. All is forgiven, and that's just the way it is."

"Wait, so your father is cheating on your mother?" he asks. Tabbie snorts into her hands, then looks at Elder Knight through her fingers.

"Yes? No? I don't even know how to answer that question." She tells Elder Knight, who raises an eyebrow.

"I mean, cheating is pretty straightforward. Is he having sex with someone else behind your mother's back?" Tabbie stares at him for a moment before she dissolves into a fit of giggles. Elder Knight stares at her, confused.

"It's just… It's more complicated than that. I can't get into it, but I'm starting to feel like I'm going to implode trying to sort out what's real anymore." She stares into the palms of her hands as Elder Knight rubs his hand over Tabbie's back.

"Have you spoken to your father about your concerns? He is the Bishop, after all. There must be something he can say to help you understand whatever is going on." Tabbie turns to give Elder Knight a dubious look, scoffing at the suggestion.

"My father is the last person on earth that I would want to talk to about this. My mother is a close second. But, I keep having to, they won't leave me alone about it until I tell them that I forgive them. I can't mention anything to Demi at all." Elder Knight pulls Tabbie into a tight hug.

"Listen. I don't know what the story is, but I'm here for anything you need." He reassures her, running his fingers through her hair. Tabbie nuzzles her head into his neck, the scent of his soap lingering on his skin. She wraps her arms around his waist, pressing herself into his embrace. The seconds tick by as Tabbie squeezes her eyes shut, trying to burn the memory of her father's study. She begins to lift her face from his shoulder, and he backs up slightly, his arms still holding her gently. Their lips are just inches away from each other, the heat radiating between the two. Tabbie leans closer, but Elder Knight hesitates. Tabbie stops, smiling to herself.

"I'm sorry. I just… I don't know if I believe in the church and its doctrine anymore. It feels like a fairy tale being pushed by men who want to maintain control," she leans back, separating from the hug, letting her hand fall onto Elder Knight's thigh. "It's not fair for me to drag you down this rabbit hole with me," Tabbie tells him, slipping her hand away. Elder Knight's hand catches hers, clasping tightly around Tabbie's fingers.

"I'll be honest with you. I don't know how to unpack what you're going through. But do what is best for you. You're a good person. Just do what you believe is right." He tells her. Tabbie smiles then chuckles to herself.

"I don't know if anything I want to do while I figure this out is church approved. I think we need to adapt to the Amish, take a Rumspringa. Just grab a handsome man in service to God, and test out the world around us." She tells Elder Knight. He grins, squeezing her hand once more before leaning back in his chair, his arm resting on the back of Tabbie's chair.

"I can name at least one man in service to God who would happily join you on your personal Rumspringa." he says with a sly grin. Tabbie rolls her eyes, smirking back at him.

"The Prophet, obviously." She teases. Elder Knight leans forward, clutching in his feigning pain.

"Oh, right in the ego!" Elder Knight groans. He sits back upright as Tabbie cackles next to him, playfully pulling her into him. Tabbie leans forward, her head resting comfortably on Elder Knight's shoulder. They huddle together as they laugh, hesitating to separate from each other. Tabbie slowly pulls away, glancing up at Elder Knight. She freezes, entranced by the sharp blue of his eyes, the way they contrasted with the darkness of his hair. She watches as a flirty smile spreads over Elder Knight's lips, just inches away from her own. He chuckles, his breath warm on her lips.

"This probably shouldn't happen right now." He tells her. Tabbie lifts her fingers to her lips, surprised at herself. He smiles, his hand cupping her cheek, before slowly lowering her hand from her face.

"Trust me. I want to. I really want to. But-…" he taps his missionary badge. "I shouldn't. Especially not with giant Jesus watching me." Elder Knight says, pointing at a large painting of Jesus on the cross hanging on the back wall. Tabbie looks back at the picture and claps her hands over her mouth, stifling her laugh.

"That's a quick way to kill a mood!" Tabbie exclaims as they laugh. As their laughter quiets, they hear the humming sound of the congregation singing the closing hymn. Elder Knight quickly checks his watch as he stands. He extends his hand to Tabbie, who takes it, standing next to him.

"I think we may have abandoned the congregation for long enough. Let's get back," Elder Knight pauses, placing his hands on Tabbie's waist, slowly looking her up and down. She gives him a quizzical look.

"What exactly are you doing?" Tabbie asks. Elder Knight grins as he slips his hands away, hooking his thumb in his pocket.

"Memorizing you. You look magnificent today." He tells her before opening the door to the hallway, holding it open. Tabbie blushes, hurrying out the entrance to the hall. She peeks into the congregation hall, everyone standing for the final hymn. The pair take their places, joining in with the remainder of the crowd as they finish the final chorus. Tabbie's mother gives her a side-eyed look before lowering her head to her chest. Bishop Kimball stands at the podium. His eyes close as he lowers his head, waiting for total silence to begin the closing prayer.

"Dearest Heavenly Father. We are grateful for the lessons we have learned today. We worship thee, and we thank thee for thy guidance, protection, and deliverance. As the coming week progresses, may we act in a godly fashion and persevere in our goals. May we never for the Sacrifice of Jesus, and may we remain safe, healthy, and happy as we do thy work. In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. Amen." The crowd echoes back to him a solemn amen. The room erupts with the rustling of paper and clothing, voices suddenly echoing through the room as members excitedly speak to each other. Bishop Kimball pauses, then raises a hand to the congregation.

"A quick reminder for all who are interested that my wife has prepared a lovely brunch for us all after church, with goodies to bring home with you. Please, join us this afternoon! Now, go enjoy your lessons!" Tabbie and Elder Knight catch each other's eye, and Tabbie shakes her head, rolling her eyes at her father.