Master the frequency of making love well

Many people often ask me: "What is a normal and reasonable frequency for sex?" In fact, there is no standard answer to this question. Many people like to discuss the number of times they have sex, but sexual desire is much like appetite. Some people may eat several bowls of rice a day, while others might feel full after just two bowls.

Sex is not a purely rational thing.It involves many emotional aspects and cannot be interpreted or concluded based on frequency alone. When a couple first gets together, they often seek to possess each other completely or to experience a sense of sweetness, making physical closeness extremely important. As the relationship stabilizes and both partners come to understand each other better, a sense of belonging develops on a psychological level. In building intimacy and creating a loving atmosphere, physical touch becomes secondary and supportive rather than primary. In short, when the relationship is stable, sex remains important but is no longer the main way to bring the couple closer together.

For example, when a couple first gets together, there may not be many topics to discuss. During their alone time, physical contact and sex become the most important things. However, as the relationship deepens and there are more things to talk about, the initial desire for physical touch while lying in bed gradually transforms into a desire to embrace and share the details of daily life with each other.

From another perspective, this can be seen as a form of verbal intimacy, similar to making love through words. Although the form is different, it still allows for the exchange of emotions and helps both partners understand each other better. Of course, it cannot be denied that we still need and desire sex. When we feel the urge, we naturally pursue it, and sex happens spontaneously rather than being premeditated and set as a goal to achieve. If sex is predetermined, it becomes too goal - oriented, and the number of times it occurs does not really mean anything.

Let's take a closer look at the different stages of a romantic relationship and see why sex plays different roles in each stage:

**1: The Initial Exploration Period**

When a couple first gets together, their understanding of each other is still limited. There are not many topics to discuss, and they cannot yet delve into plans for the future. The distance between them also makes it difficult to see each other's flaws, leading to greater tolerance and a more positive impression of each other. At this time, physical contact becomes something both partners look forward to and actively seek out. It also serves as an important indicator of progress in the relationship. Although the woman may not feel that sex is necessary at this stage and the couple is still getting to know each other, sex can still happen easily if the right atmosphere arises.

**2: The Passionate Acquaintance Period**

As the romance heats up, the couple may deliberately create more opportunities for alone time. This is because they have come to understand and appreciate each other deeply, and they are willing to give themselves completely to each other. A small spark of teasing can easily turn into intense passion, leading to an increase in the frequency of sex. If one partner is more clingy or has a higher sex drive and enjoys trying different sexual scenarios and timings, the frequency of sex will definitely soar. Overall, this is a period when sex occurs more frequently.

**3: The Mature Belonging Period**

By this stage, if the relationship remains stable, it should reach a new level. The couple's feelings for each other no longer need to be maintained by frequent sex. Instead, they face life's challenges together. If they can support and understand each other in daily life and overcome difficulties together, they are more likely to experience "simple happiness" and a sense of achievement in their relationship. At this point, the quality of sex is much more important than the frequency. Sometimes, emotional connection can even replace sex, making the frequency of sex less predictable.

From the above analysis, we can understand that as a couple spends more time together, the situation regarding sex will inevitably change. If they get married or have children, the situation will be even more different. But ultimately, it is because the relationship is close and both partners understand each other deeply, with more topics to discuss and activities to share. In fact, there may be more meaningful things to do than having sex, which is a normal phenomenon of a stable and growing relationship.

It cannot be denied that sex is important, even very important. However, instead of deliberately trying to control its frequency, it is better to pay more attention to the emotional connection with your partner. After all, two hearts that can communicate with each other are the most solid foundation in a relationship. As for sex and its frequency, they are just forms of expression.

Not only thrusting counts as making love.Massage, manual stimulation, oral sex, kissing, and body rubbing are all forms of lovemaking. Don't view lovemaking as something rigid. When love grows deeper and stronger, the frequency of lovemaking doesn't necessarily increase proportionally. Don't equate the frequency of sex with the depth of a relationship. If someone's sex life doesn't match your expectations, it's none of your business, so don't label them as frigid or weird.