What's never close to home

I once read a story of a woman who lost it.

Our worlds were far apart, realities not even the closest to being the same, but in some way, I wanted to lose it with her.

I wanted to step into her world, pull away the covers, and echo the screams she so desperately held within.

I wanted to tell her that they all lied to her. Nothing was ever okay and, nothing would ever be okay. I just felt like she needed the truth. For once, she needed to stop listening and start realising that the world will never be kind.

It's in its nature; it's the very thing that it does. It doesn't give you a bandage to your wound, but instead, it bleeds with you. Over and over, it bleeds, and when you can no longer take it, when your heart starts withering and you lose every sense of your spark - it yanks your breath, takes everything you've ever believed in, and life simply continues as if nothing happened.

I knew her tears before I read her lines. I faced her fears before her world was even explained to me. It was all the same - different but similar. And it's weird because the world has always judged women like her. I also happened to judge women like her.

It's almost like we always just need to be okay. Life is a massive wrecking ball, and we just need to live with it. You can't pause; you can't spiral out of control and if you do, you become her - the woman I cried with.

I don't even think she was the anti-hero; her flaws were all just mirrors to her strengths. Not what she could be or wanted to be but what she was - in the midst of the sadness, the anger, the spiralling out of control.

The fact that she felt the pain, danced with it, fought with it, wept with it, lost herself in it actually told me a rather different story.

I'd like to encourage you to lose it once in a while. Pull away the covers.

Pause, reflect, and know that you don't always have to be okay.

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Author's Note: Thank you for stepping into my world. As a writer, I tend to be indirect with most of the pieces I write and this is one of the few pieces that's actually very indirect and in tune with my emotions.

I hope this message stays with you, and if it doesn't, I hope it comes running back to you when life seems unbearabale.

Emotions can be human. It's okay to feel them.

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