What Happens Between the Walls

White fire. The unbearable hissing.

Three minutes earlier I could’ve told you what it felt like to have both of my wings–unbroken. Two minutes earlier I could’ve told you what it was like before I began twitching uncontrollably from the acid that ran through my veins. One minute earlier I could’ve told you what it was like to have not a single but a pair of antenna and how processing through these bubbling queer feelings – that we should never, ever dare to feel – would’ve been like a snap of lighting to my eight brains. But no.

These queer feelings, these bloody instincts came seeping out of me like all 543 of my Aunt Mindy’s children when they smelled the scent of sugar…and soda.

Peculiar. I remember my Aunt Mindy. But who am I? What am I? A thumping in one of my left brains.

RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE

As my eyes began to open, they immediately watered. Gobbles of tears adjusting to the thick steam that surrounded me. I looked around to try and place the strange sound. Turning my head, I knocked into my foreleg which, to my dismay, dangled in front of my eyes. A very bad sign.

RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE

My queer feelings took a hold–sharply twisting my skeleton in the direction of the rattling against my body’s will. Loud popping sounds from the base of my vertebrae.

I squinted. Trying to blink away the billowing tears that seemed to fly away from my face. The rattling was faster, my body was rocking. And then that awful queer feeling. The deepest, penetrating hopelessness when you know that something dreadful was going to happen.

RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE

The door to my right slid open. Alert–I relaxed, realizing it was just an old bugger. Hopefully he wouldn’t ask about my ticket. I obviously had just been in a severe accident. Not sure how I got here but he better be understand–

“SHELLY!” He hissed.

Was that my name? I blinked at him.

“Oh, Shelly…” his crooked brow softened. “Oh, Shelly,” he said again, the stress in his voice as thick as the steam that surrounded us. “I’m sorry. But this was necessary. Thank you. Thank y–” he began to sob. “You are too young to know what this will mean for our evolution–” he smiled a mad smile. Pincers fierce in the light that illuminated us from the racing scenes that whipped by. “But Shelly,” he said, his voice heightening, “we did it…we broke the system!”

“Sis…him?” I managed.

The steam was now thin enough to see him clamoring with all 12 legs onto the seat. Reaching–he stopped just before I realized what he was pointing at.

RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE

“Was tha?” I twitched.

“The emergency break,” he smiled a wicked smile, “You broke it. Shelly, WE ARE FREE!”

He scurried. He danced.

“Oh those giants. Those ‘gods’. We’ll show them who’s god! We have power in numbers! Generations of stealing our intelligence, trapping us, squashing us, exterminating us–and the round and round, the round and round that goes nowhere,” he ran his fingers over his antenna manically, “They knew! Didn't they? Our intelligence. We were reaching critical mass. They were afraid. Afraid we’ll do to them what they did to us! Those single cell brained giants! Goofy idiots! But we were meant to survive. We were born to survive,” he nearly spat, “We created these systems. We shed our skins for it. All the death. And now it’s time–eat their earwax, bite their lips until they bleed–like we did before they made us ride this hellish train! We will go now. We are going!”

“Where we gone?” I asked breathlessly. My head spinning.

RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE

“Oh, my dear! You do not remember the mission?” He breathed. I was caught off guard by the elegance in which he walked toward me. His sturdiness as the train zipped and shook.

RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE RATTLE

He bent and leaned, spine cracking, “Where are we going?”, he was almost whispering, “Why Shelly, to the top of the food chain of course…to manifest destiny!”

Wheels shrieking. White fire. And the unbearable hissing.