Weeps my human psyche (Pt 1)

The river ran backwards on the day the Queen vanished. She spoke to me, The River, of her sojourn, her inner Charybdis into the vortex of torment. Long did I listen to her lamented mourn as she walked the banks of me. My soothing waters tried to lustrate and purify her spirit, but alas, could not. The night creatures had taken a hold of her tortured and frail quintessence, dragging it deep into a vanishing chasm. May there be hope, I prayed, of her expurgation and purification.

The willow wept as its branches swayed in sorrow. It felt an ominous wind blowing from the north. The south wind whispered "something dark this way comes"!

Was this an omen or the imagination awakening from a troubled sleep.

"I find myself crying black tendrils of fiery tears on dark nights beneath a moonless sky".

Oh, how awful were her words.

"I rip and tear at the fabric of creation. Yet all I unearth are putrid strands of my bloody hair, they are like red serpents crawling down my cheek.

My entire existence seems a constant series of memes. Forever knowing that what the world sees or hears is but a masquerade of the real me, the me which either quivers or rages behind a terrible black wall of anger. A seething dreadful wild, pent-up and caged animal that lurks in shadows. The monster spends its time hurtling its great terror filled body against the cage of life, growling, bellowing and foaming at the mouth like a horrid rabid beast.

It is a dangerous animal. Existing within a mind Clueless...a blank slate rearing to paint the outer world in colors of red and crimson pools of horror".

"Welcome to my world. She laments".

Do you, dear reader, portray an outward mask of constant euphoric glee, pretending to be someone you are not. Always hiding behind a mask of deep insecurities and fear of facing your real self. Do you have a deep seated need to have the world see you as forever positive and upbeat.

A grinning farce in a clown-like costume...hiding a monster beneath!

Of such were the words of the vanishing queen.

"Yet I yearn for the darkness. I feel safe in the back alley of my existence, where others peer in and quickly walk away. They fear the glowing eyes and hungry growls.

IS MY LIFE A COMPLETE made up lie?

In origin and evolution have I really changed much. Do I not still live in that ancient cave, the history written in symbols upon the walls?

Questions, questions! They nag at my soul and consume my every waking moment.

Answers elude me".

+

A dark journey into the psyche, from the observation of a backward flowing river. It sees the dual perspectives of the human evolution.

"I delve beneath the thin veneer of sanity, where lies a labyrinthine landscape of the human psyche, a realm of shadows, forgotten memories and secrets long buried. It is here that my story begins, in the dimly lit corridors of a mind uncharted and untouched by the light of reason.

The journeyer, Maelstrom, steps hesitantly into this shadowed domain. Each footfall echoes with a hollow resonance, a stark reminder of the isolation that comes with introspection. The walls of this mental maze are adorned with fragments of thoughts and half-formed dreams, twisted and intertwined like the vines of a forsaken forest.

As Maelstrom ventures deeper, the air grows thick with the weight of suppressed emotions. Guilt, like a relentless specter, hovers just out of sight, its presence felt in the chill that seeps into the very marrow of M's bones. Regret, a silent predator, watches from the shadows, ready to pounce upon any moment of weakness.

In the heart of this haunted mansion of a life lies the Hall of Mirrors, each pane reflecting a different facet of M's soul. One mirror shows a smiling face, but the eyes betray a depth of sadness that words cannot convey. Another mirror shatters as M approaches, the fragments revealing distorted images of past mistakes and missed opportunities.

The journey is not without its trials. Phantoms of doubt and fear rise from the ground, their twisted forms a burning sword to the inner turmoil that plagues the human mind. M fights through these apparitions, each battle leaving scars that run deeper than any physical wound.

Yet, amidst the darkness, there are glimmers of hope. A distant, flickering light that promises redemption and understanding. It is here, in this place of introspective darkness, that M confronts her innermost demons. The process is excruciating, each revelation like a knife's edge cutting through the soul. But it is also liberating.

As the journey nears its end, M emerges from the labyrinth of the mind, but how much has changed. The world still looks the same. The shadows that once held power now seemed to cower from that which it now sees upon the countenance of Maelstrom's new image. There was new strength found within. Doubt and fear had somehow receded, replaced by a newfound clarity and acceptance.

This dark journey into the psyche need not be one of despair, but of transformation. It is a path that every soul must walk to truly understand the depth and breadth of the human experience. Can M step back into the light, carrying the knowledge that even in the darkest corners of the mind, there is always a glimmer of hope. Can she be the queen that she once was"?

The river happily flows with the direction of a now calmer queen, awaiting the next time that she chooses to vanish inside of her shattered mind.

Many months passed and peace seemed purposeful and content. But one dark and dreadful night, the Queen went bloody MAD.

Pt 2! Coming soon.