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Watching Over You

500 Word Shockwave Challenge

By Cristal S.Published 10 months ago 2 min read
Photo by tree lee on Pexels

Most of the houses were already dark as it was almost midnight. There was something so relaxing, almost meditative, about the stroll through suburban streets. The night was warm and quiet, crickets chirping the only thing to hear. The sound of summer. Anthony took his time walking home.

His wandering thoughts were abruptly cut off by a deafening scream: "NO!" Anthony jolted in the same direction and saw a man chasing after a girl. He caught up to them just as the man had grabbed the girl from behind. Anthony clutched the man by the hood and yanked hard to get him off of her. Coughing and gasping for breath, the man managed to struggle himself free and escape into the darkness.

Anthony kneeled next to the girl to help her up. She thanked him, stuttering and sobbing, explaining how she goes for a run when she can’t sleep and how around the corner that man started chasing her.

Anthony asked if she lived close by to walk her home safely, and having learned she lived about two miles from there, insisted she come with him to get cleaned up. Anthony only lived a couple of houses down the street. He offered to drive her home or call an Uber for her. The girl hesitated but agreed when standing up sent a sharp pain through her right ankle. Anthony, supporting her gently, led her to his house.

"Do I know you from somewhere?" asked Anthony, when a nagging feeling of her looking familiar wouldn’t leave him. After a pause longer than Anthony had expected, the girl answered, "I think I just have very common facial features, or maybe you've seen me at the park."

Anthony showed her where the bathroom was, gave her a clean towel and went into the kitchen to get a bottle of water. As he reached for the bottle, he caught a glimpse of a shadow passing behind him, but before he could react, he felt a sudden blow to the back of his head. The light faded into hovering blurry splashes and the ringing in his ears grew louder as he fell face-first on the kitchen floor.

Opening his eyes, he had no idea how much time had passed. Instinctively trying to get up, he felt his hands tightly tied behind his back, and someone gently brushing his hair away from his face with a soft "shh-shh-shh."

"Do I know you from somewhere?" Her voice now giggly—mocking his question from earlier, like it had been a joke. The girl looked at him with eyes distant, as if she was looking right through him, inside him. Her smile was too wide, too stiff and the expression never reached her eyes—cold, perfectly rehearsed for this moment. She slowly leaned in closer, whispering, "Babe, I’m the love of your life! For a long time, I’ve been running past your house two or three times a day, making sure you were okay and nobody would come between us."

HorrorMicrofictionPsychologicalthrillerShort Story

About the Creator

Cristal S.

I’ve noticed when I follow the path I enjoy most, I often end up swimming upstream. So here I am, right in the middle of it – writing about it all and more. ♡

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  1. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  2. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

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Comments (3)

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  • Euan Brennan10 months ago

    Last comment, I promise! I had to read your entry for the challenge. Damn good atmosphere; the change felt seamless and sudden. I thought Anthony was going to be the 'crazy' one, but I got it wrong, lol. I love your writing style.

  • Ina Zeneli10 months ago

    Your story starts off calm and familiar but takes a chilling turn—I loved the suspense and the unexpected twist at the end!

  • Antoni De'Leon10 months ago

    oh dear

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