Two wolves

Two

by

THE DARKNESS

The sound of rocks clinking against metal wakes me from a groggy sleep. The air is very thick and warm. Two men mumble next to me. Where am I? What is happening? The last thing I remember is my grandfather's hand clenching mine as we were running through a field.

One man’s voice is softer than the other. They’re arguing over something, but I can’t quite make it out, but I think they’re speaking English. I recognize a little from watching cartoons. It’s dark, but I can make out a tire with my foot. I’m in a car trunk.

One of the men yells out in a deep angry voice. It reminds me of a vicious dog.

My eyes burn from the sweat pouring from my head, so I close my eyes. I grasp for the locket that hangs around my neck. It’s still there, as it’s always been. I turn over the cool metal in my hand. My comfort, my rock. I can breathe again. I close my eyes, remembering how good life was before the virus came and ripped it all apart.

THE WALK

Driving down the dirt road, my hands grip the steering wheel of my grandpa’s truck. The sun warms my face as I draw in a long breath of Arizona air. My grandpa sits next to me, patiently looking ahead at the barren road. We are far from anywhere or anyone now.

“Okay, slow down Nina, You’re going to turn left up here.” He says, pointing ahead.

Although we’ve made this trip many times, this is the first time I’ve driven. I look over to the west.

“Now, very carefully turn, Nina,” Grandpa says quietly.

I turn the wheel into the open field, and I look to my grandpa

“Very good,'' he says, bursting with pride.

We drive until I see the willow tree. If you haven’t seen it before, you would think it was a mirage because it’s the only willow tree in the entire field.

“ Now let off the gas Nina, and gently brake.”.

I let my foot off the gas and slowly press down the brake until the truck stops. I look to Grandpa for reassurance.

“You’re becoming an excellent driver,” he says sincerely.

The sound of the door creaks as I open the rusted door to get out. I walk to the back of the truck and wait for Grandpa's instructions. We’ve done this routine a hundred times, but I always treat it as if it's the first. I wish I had known this would be the last time. . Grandpa grabs the crate full of bottles from the bed of the truck and hands it to me. . He gives me the crate and grabs the quilts along with a water jug, and puts them over his shoulder. We walk a short distance across the field into the beautiful baron planes of the Arizona lands.

“This seems like a good spot,” he says.

I set the crate down and remove the bottles out one at a time. Once the container is empty, I flip it upside down and carefully place the bottles on top in a straight line.

“Space them out just a bit more, Nina. It's always good to challenge ourselves.”

I adjust the bottles further apart, and we make the long walk back to the willow tree. I sit down underneath the tree. The shade feels good. Grandfather sits down next to me and takes a breath. He hands me the water jug. The cool water hits my lips as the water gently flows into my mouth. I hand the jug back to Grandpa, and he takes a much-deserved swig.

He unrolls the quilt and takes out the rifle, then lays it out on the dirt, and we sit in silence for a bit.

''Do you remember what is the first thing we always do?” He asks, handing me his rifle.

“Check that the safety is on,'' I answer, yearning for his approval.

“Very good.“ He says, turning the rifle over to check the safety then aims it towards the sky. “The wind is strong today," he says.

Getting into position, Grandpa motions for me to come closer. I move close and look through the sight.

“ Which one should I hit?” He asks. I carefully look at each bottle.

“The one on the far left,“ I say confidently

He turns the rifle slightly towards the left. With his finger on the trigger, he aims, exhales, and squeezes—the bullet whistles across the field, and the bottle on the far left shatters. I clap my hands together in a fit. My grandpa smiles and sets the rifle down.

”Are you ready?” he asks, knowing my answer.

Kneeling beside him, I position the rifle and aim with laser focus. Then close my eyes and slow my breathing, just like he taught me so many times before. I want to show him. Show him what I can do. Show him how all the lessons he’d given me over the years paid off. Was he ready for it? I’ve waited so long to show him because I didn’t want him to stop teaching me, but I can’t control myself any longer.

“Which one, Nina?” he asks. “Now remember…”

But before he could finish, I fired. Not once, but four times. Each bottle shattering in line. I look toward Grandfather. His eyes are as big as moons, and his mouth hangs open. Is he mad? I shouldn’t have done it. Then, a smile comes over his face, as I’ve never seen. A grin so big it looks as if his skin will crack.

“As I suspected, you are no longer the student but the master. I was wondering how long it was going to take you to show me what you could do!”

As the sun begins to mellow, we sit under the willow tree taking turns drinking from the water jug. The silence wraps us in sublime relaxation.

“Grandpa?” I ask, breaking the silence.

“Yes, Nina?”,

“Why did my father leave me?”

Grandfather gazes toward the horizon with his tired, wrinkled eyes, searching for the correct answer.

“You know Nina, your father loved you very much, the day you were born, he was so proud.”. My grandfather looks at me with crystal clear eyes. “Your father made certain decisions that affected his life.”

“What kind of decisions?”

“Bad ones.”

“Does that make him a bad person ?.”

“It's not as simple as good or bad. People are not all good or are all bad. Just because someone makes a bad decision doesn’t make them a bad person”.

Confused, I look to the horizon, searching for what my grandfather found in the baron field.

“ I don’t understand, '' I replied, embarrassed by my ignorance.

My grandfather looks to me with all the love in the world. “You see, Nina, there is a war inside of us all, a war between two wolves. One wolf is the light in us. Love, empathy, joy. It uplifts our spirits and guides us through obstacles. Then there is the dark wolf, which is Anger, envy, hate. This wolf wants nothing but to see us lost. It's a war that goes on within us every day.“.

I look deep into grandfather's eyes and ask,. “Which one wins?”

THE LONG ROAD AHEAD

The sound of metal pierces my ears as the car comes to a stop.

The car door opens. Suddenly, the trunk pops up and light radiates in, blinding me.

“It's ok, there is nothing to be afraid of”, the gentle voice assures me. My eyes adjust enough to make out a man with a mask standing before me, holding his hand out.

“It's ok, you can take my hand, ''

I take it and he pulls me out. The kind man hands me a bottle of water. My eyes become as big as tangerines as I take the bottle from his hand. I open the bottle and lift it to my mouth. I close my eyes hoping this moment lasts forever . Suddenly the cool embrace of the water quenching my thirst is interrupted by a loud slam from one of the car doors. The two men begin to argue back and forth as they walk away from the car. I begin to look around. There's a sign placed a few feet away that reads ' Americon facility 2 miles ahead”. As the two men continue to argue I decide to walk closer to try and hear what is being said. As I walk slowly around the side of the car I can see a gun laying on the dash of the vehicle. The metal from the gun glimmers from the sun as it lays on the warm dashboard. I begin to hear the men's words more clearly.

“ So let me get this straight, after driving 60 miles across this shit hole of a state and having to wear these fucking masks over our faces for a week , you suddenly are getting a conscience?,” The short man yells with disbelief.

The tall man looks back at me before retorting with a defensive manner. “This is not right “ he lets out as the words purge out of his body giving him a sense of clarity.

“Right has nothing to do with it , we made a deal with the company and I will be damned if you back out on that deal now!”the dark voice says.

The gentle giant says something to the short man that I cannot make out. Whatever he said his words stuck into the dark man’s heart like a knife. The tall man begins to walk towards me . As he begins to approach nearer my ears become muffled with the sudden sound of a freight train across the baron field. I look ahead as my eyes become widened at the sight of my tall friend as he falls to the ground . The short man begins to walk over to my fallen savior and begins to speak to him as his back is turned to me. I look to the car to see the glimmering gun as it bakes against the dash of the car.

Suddenly my hand begins to raise against my neck as if it was on its own accord. I can feel the metal of the locket as it runs against my dry hand. I quickly open the door and take the gun from the dashboard and begin to walk swiftly toward the two men. As I approach nearer I can remember my grandfather and I sitting under the willow tree what seemed like ages ago.

“Which one wins? “ I ask him. The Memory so clear in my mind.

My grandfather looks at me and says “ The one you feed”.

I pull the trigger, as the bullet crashes into the dark man forcing him to fall. I walk closer to see that my gentle giant is still breathing . I walk over and kneel beside my dying friend. I gently take his hand , they feel as cold as ice. His eyes look into mine as he begins to speak with the little energy he has left.

“ I’m sorry that I killed your grandpa,'' he says .

His eyes begin to sink as I take my hand and Carefully brush them against his face.

I stand up still holding the gun firmly in my hand as I walk back to the car. I open the driver side door and get in. The seat is warm from the sun as my skin lays against it. I slowly turn the key starting the car as the exhaust bellows out from outside . I look behind me at the empty road from where we once came. I look to the sign reàding “Amercon facility 2 mile marker” . My eyes turn to the road ahead. My grandfather's words come to me once more “ The one You feed”. I begin my journey ahead to the Unknown place that is “Americon”.