True Love

I feel him before I actually feel him. He tries so much to just let me rest but he also wants to show me that he loves me. “Hey, baby,” I say, half asleep still. It feels like I have not slept these past couple of days. Just a couple of days? It feels like I had a month crammed into that time. I sit up and give him a coy smile and he winks at me with that smile of his own that makes me tingle.

“Are you feeling better?” He asks, taking my hand into his and kissing it. “You gave me quite a scare. Are you ok? Do you want to talk about it? I can just hold you also if you wanted.” Of course, I wanted him to hold me. DUH!

“I am better. I still can’t seem to get my head clear thought but I am better.” I rub between my eyes and sigh. “If it is ok with you, I would just like to chill at home. I don’t feel like going anywhere or doing anything.”

“That…..that sounds perfect. You deserve to rest and just get your head straight.” He bows and, with his best butler voice, he says, “I will take care of everything, milady.” He comes up and winks at me and asks if I would like some coffee. He heads into the kitchen to get us a cup. He comes out with a cup and a donut. Does he know me or what!?

“Thank you. You know me so well.” I take a big bite of the donut and then take a swig of my coffee. Mmmmmm. Like heaven. “What did you have planned today?”

“Not much. I was thinking of going into town to get stuff for dinner tonight, did you want to stay here or come with?”

“I would just like to sit here. Do you still love me?” I say, cocking my head and smiling at him.

“Oh, I don’t know.” He throws his head back like a teenager does when you just told them to be social. “I might have enough energy to make it to the door but-” He melts off of the couch and flops onto the floor. “I might have to get a kiss to get past that part.”

We laugh and I walk him to the door and give him a sensual kiss. “Hey. Think about me while I am gone.” He gives that smile again and winks at me. God, he is good. I tell him that I might and I just stand there, watching him get into the car.

After I head inside and freshen up a little bit, and think of him a few times, I head back downstairs and see what is on TV. Good, another Dateline. Just what a paranoid person with anxiety needs to watch. I let it play in the background and text Jerry that I love him. I sip on my new cup of coffee and I make faces at the TV as I eat my last piece of cake. One thing I loved about this place, we can literally never put clothes on again, while in the house that is. We are so perfectly spaced from the other neighbors that you would have to be very close to get a peek of our house, let alone who is inside. Very creepy at night, when you are alone but not bad during the day.

I know it will take him a while to get home, so I just snuggle down on the couch and catch a little more Zzz’s. He will wake me once he gets home and we can spend the day together. It seems like an eternity since I spent the night with him but, then again, I guess that was just a couple of days ago.

What’s that noise? I wake up and spring into drama mode. I gaze around and see if he is home yet. I call his name but no one answers me. I creep through the kitchen and look out of the window and gasp….he is home but it appears that one of his bags ripped open, spilling cans of food rolling around the ground. That must have been what I heard. Him, cussing out the cans. Well, being I was thinking about him, I might just know how to calm him down a little. I lick my lips thinking of this and I throw on my robe to go help him.

“Aw, baby. You ok? What happened?” I trot up to him and bend down to help him. He just lets out a laugh and tells me that these cans must have decided to jump ship and he guesses they wanted to start a family together. “What. The. Actual. Fuck. Did you smoke anything on the way to the store? What the hell is wrong with you, silly head.” I laugh at this and we finally get the groceries into the house. “What did you have in mind for dinner, baby?”

“Well, I thought I would dazzle you with my culinary skills. First, I will be unwrapping a freshly-ish baked bun. Second, I will be frying up the finest brat, I know how milady loves her sausage, and third, I will top it with your favorite, tomato puree, and crushed mustard seeds and vinegar. Finally, I will top it all off WIIITH…….the best potatoes that Idaho can give, cut, salted, and baked to a crunchy perfection that will just….mmmmmm…...melt in your mouth.”

“Oh, hot dogs and chips. Sounds good.” I grab a chip, smack his ass and walk out of the kitchen while he stands there, gaping at my lack of enthusiasm for his culinary masterpiece. As I go to walk around the corner, I say, slyly, “Sounds good, Jeeves. Just make sure that I get all of the perfect chips. My stomach does not want to have to digest the lesser chips.” I wink and blow a kiss at him and he laughs as he gets lunch ready.

I hear him humming in the kitchen as he is getting it all ready. He loves to cook and, honestly, I love that he does. I can cook but in times like this, I am glad that I didn’t have to cook through it all. He finally comes in with both of our plates, gives me shit for taking up the whole couch and he just wants to be near me and sits down, while I protest, and we eat while I have our playlist playing on the TV.

I love these days. Just him and I and nothing to do but be together. He grabs my plate from me and says he is going to clean up the kitchen a little and make sure he has everything ready for dinner and then, he said it was time for his desert. I smile, slip off the robe as he leaves and I just lay there. Luckily my head is on the opposite side of where he will come in. I just let my legs lay open, so he gets a good view of it and I start to rub, a little at first but I hear him coming back and go back into the kitchen for something.

I hear his footsteps get closer to me and I lay my head back so that he can see I am fully into this display of affection. I moan, loud. “Here you….go baby…..all you can…..lick…” I hear nothing and I just think he is standing there, stroking it as he is watching me. I lift my head back and open my eyes to stare at him dreamily and I am blinded by a light. What is going on? Ugh, I feel sick. I close my eyes but I still the green flashing light through my lids. I open them again and try to blink fast to get a better idea of what is going on but I can’t see anything.

“Baby? You ok?” I hear him say but I can’t see him. “What’s wrong? Why are you blinking that way?”

“Where are you? I can’t see you. I can’t see anything but this light.”

“I am sitting right next to you. Can you feel me?”

I can’t. I try to reach out but tip over onto the floor and as my eyes remain open, that blasted light keeps flashing. Pulsing into my brain. I feel sick but more like that sick when you can’t move or even throw up because you know you would just die after that. I try to move and reach for Jerry but I don’t even hear anything anymore. I close my eyes and try to roll away from the light but I can’t move. I am frozen for some reason.

I open them up again to see if I can make out anything in the room but realize, I am not in the house anymore. Where am I? I can’t focus on anything because I just have that damn light in my eyes still. I try to blink fast but nothing happens. It is like I have a permanent burn of that light that nothing shows but that. “Jerry? Are you there? Am I dreaming again?”

I hear footsteps slowly walking toward me. Thank God. “I can’t see baby. I have some stupid light burned into my eyes and I can’t focus on anything. Can you help me to the couch again?”

I hear something shuffle near me and suddenly, my ears are ringing and I can’t hear anything anymore. I go to cover my ears but I can’t move my arms again. I feel my mouth open up to scream but I don’t hear anything but that damned ringing. What the fuck is going on? I feel arms around me, lifting me from the floor. I am limp again and I feel a wave of relief rush over me. Jerry must be getting me back to the couch. Finally.

I feel the wind on my face and body, still naked here. Where, where is he taking me? As the sun hits my face, I start to clear out the light in my eyes that I had. Who in the fuck? “WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU? MY BOYFRIEND IS HOME!! JEEEERRRRYYYYY!!!!!” I scream as those red eyes catch mine again. We pass the pear tree and I know it is taking me to the barn again. Oh, no. I hope it is not going to try to get the rope again. I try to kick and hit it but I still can’t move my limbs.

“WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT FROM ME?? WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU??? JERRY?? WHERE ARE YOU??” I scream, I think. I still can’t hear anything but that ringing in my ears.

Just as I think I am about to get the energy to kick it, I see myself spin over and I land on my face.

That must have knocked me out for a bit. I taste blood again but at least I can hear again. I still can’t move my arms or legs but I can hear again. I cry out for Jerry and I hope to God he hears me this time. I hear the door to the house open and slam shut. I hear his feet running towards the barn. I see his shadow on the wall and feel him roll me over, into his arms. I sob, hard into his chest. He holds me close to him and presses my ear into him. Caressing my head, he kisses me and promises me that all will be better. I close my eyes and sob my eyes out. Am I finally safe? I feel like I finally have safety…..