To You – The Children I Do Not Have Yet

I write this now because these are people and matters that are important and shaped my life. This is a precaution in case I am unable to share these things in person, one never knows where life will take you.

This is the speech I would have liked to have made the day my father handed over the Duchy to me, with the King’s blessing of course.

It was never said for two real reasons; firstly it would have been too long, people don’t really want to listen to speeches of those in my position unless they really have to. Secondly, and perhaps more importantly, it is far too personal for public consumption. Some things are just not to be shared, additionally I’m certain the Queen will hear about it, she seems to know everything, and I don’t quite know how she will feel about it. For the purpose of a private missive, it doesn’t matter how she feels, because it is the truth as I see it.

I was born to nobility. It is all I have ever known, but it was as they say, complicated. I am the only child of Cahira, Daughter of Duke Ruane of Psyare. My mother was an eldest daughter, born in a time where it meant it was her duty to find a good and suitable husband whilst her younger brother, my uncle, would inherit.

My mother though was headstrong, a fact you will hopefully have the pleasure of finding out on your own, but it bears saying anyway. She fell in love with a mercenary and was sent away because that was hardly a suitable match… a tale that many years later has a happy ending I am happy to say.

On her return to the Duchy, she was attacked by a rogue wolf shifter. Everyone was certain she would die, my grandfather made an unusual choice and sent her to the shifter clan finding refuge in our woods. Miraculously she survived.

More in the end she thrived, and somehow, I came to be. I was considered another miracle, a thing that should never have been. For a time I grew up amongst those who could change into wolves, but as I would never change, I was given to my grandfather to be raised as a noble, a proper little princess so to speak. My past though was a blemish, any of those can affect your marriage prospects, and despite my stubborn nature the correct manner of things was the course my life appeared to be on, until Evayn.

She wasn’t the Queen back then. She’d say she was a nobody. The daughter of farmers, trained to fight. To me she was amazing. Mercenaries had come and gone through our court, it simply was the way things worked, ofttimes loyalty is important but sometimes loyalty to money is the better option. Not that I am about to get distracted by a discussion on politics and fighting here.

Until her I had never seen a female mercenary. I didn’t know such a thing was an option for women. Evayn though made her own place in the world. Her hair was cut short, she wore trousers and leather armour. Her weapons of choice were dual wielded blades carried in a specially designed harness strapped to her back. She looked fierce, formidable.

I used to sneak out to watch her train. She was so fast. At first the soldiers scoffed, but they soon learnt. She didn’t need the men in her team to defend her, though they would have in a heartbeat, she inspired that kind of loyalty, even then.

When I was quite a bit older, I heard the story of how Xellen wouldn’t take her on without seeing her fight. He pitched her against Boyd, biggest guy on the crew. She beat him.

When everything was said and done, and all the dust settled, Boyd eventually took over from Xellen leading the crew, a more loyal and skilled bunch you would be hard pressed to find. Xellen settled here, to help me and Shan well Evayn nabbed him, he became her second, and the Kings’ Sword Master.

By the time my Grandfather asked for their help, Evayn was considered Xellen’s third and no one seeing her inaction would ever question that point. Their arrival in Psyare was at a pivotal time in the Duchy’s life, the Kingdom’s life, politics was dragging us into a dark place.

What she did next altered the path of my life forever.

My uncle returned home demanding the title of Duke. He had expected to inherit and no longer wanted to wait. It turned out there were behind the scene dealings going on and he was a pawn, a willing pawn, for the Crown Prince – an evil man who would have ruined us all. When Grandfather wouldn’t bend to Finn’s request, my uncle was manipulated into a duel, with Evayn stepping in to act as my grandfather’s champion. As I was the one who ultimately benefitted from her actions she became known as my champion.

She killed my uncle and kept our Duchy safe from threats I had no understanding about at the time. I don’t really know what happened that day. Which is to say I wasn’t supposed to be there, a duel hardly being a fitting place for a young girl. The fight though became famous for its brevity and Evayn rose to be beloved by our citizens. The fact she is now Queen means much and causes great pride. We like to claim her as our own.

She would say what she did that day was nothing. In fact she has been overheard to say it was the right thing to do and she was merely the best person to fill that role. She believes it was simply something that had to be done. We all know better.

She left her crew after that, but I saw her many times. She has shown me what it is to lead people. She let me see it was possible for a woman to push boundaries and be who she believes herself to be. She told grandfather that maybe it would be alright if a Duchess ruled rather than some man chosen for her to marry.

Evayn the mercenary, went on to depose the old Queen and the Crown Prince, and the younger son and our kingdom were, and still are, better for it. Her actions removed a sickness that was killing our Kingdom from the inside out.

She almost sacrificed everything to get the job done. There are things I am privy to that I hope to be able to share with you one day – hopefully in a more civilised manner than I found out about some of it (eavesdropping on my mother and Xellen).

Somethings are just not my story to tell.

What is my story is the fact I sit as Duchess and a woman is accepted to rule due to the actions of another amazing woman; born on a farm, touched by destiny, determined to be true to herself, and maybe blessed by the legacy of a special bloodline - but shhhhh, that bit is part of what is not my story to tell.

If you do me proud and rule with honour, these secrets may one day become yours to keep.

Adara

Duchess of Psyare

If you like this story and are intrigued by the characters here in, please head to Amazon to check out and buy the full story; starting with Becoming, moving onto Steps to Destiny and concluding in Embracing Fate. They are also available on Kobo here. I also have a collection of short stories from that world Origins and Legacies (or here).