The Sisters Gruff

Billie Gruffington was not a fan of many things. The very small town she lived in. The fact it wasn't near Paris, France, but rather, the one in Tennessee. Broccoli, the way her oldest sister Iris chewed said broccoli (really any food), the upsetting fact she was the youngest, her elementary school, yes, the list went on and on. In fact, Billie wore a scowl on her face most days, even more than the next door neighbor, Clarence, the crotchety old man often seen on his rocking chair sipping on his morning coffee every morning.

However, there wasn't anything Billie hated worse than the rickety Luther Bridge over Grimms Creek. The way it swayed when the wind barely blew or when the three sisters clacked across it on their way to school and back. Or the amount of near misses they all had thanks to many loose boards, although middle sister, Rosaline, Rosie for short, was prone to tripping over air and her feet seemed to be magnets for many a trip hazard. This was unfortunate since it was the only way to get to the nearby goat farm, Billie's favorite haunt and the only place that regularly saw Billie's smile.

What was also unfortunate and really was the worst part of Luther Bridge though, was the Troll.

That's what the Gruffington sisters called the mean newly teenaged boy who sadly, also lived near the goat farm in the biggest house in the area. Trevor Reginald Oswald Livingston III, as he often reminded his victims, seemed only to exist to torture anyone in new and creative ways. Trevor's endeavor this past week involved crouching underneath the bridge, waiting for the tip taps of unsuspecting peers before he leapt to the surface, demanding payment - what he deemed to be the best parts of their lunch.

You see, Trevor may have lived in the biggest house with a fancy chef who made expensive lunches, but when he saw the other kids with their sandwiches, something ugly came to the surface. Why couldn't his mom get up early like the others to make his lunch or to even make sure to say goodbye as he walked out the door? Of course, this wasn't an excuse for his luncheon heist, but anger and frustration are not often the foundations of great decision making.

Billie was the only kid in the neighborhood who had been spared, thanks to a flu Iris bought home and gave to Rosie. Rosie then accidently sneezed all over Billie one day (Billie to this day still doesn't think it was an accident), and then bam, Billie was sick. Billie had been annoyed because like most people, she didn't enjoys fevers and stuffy noses. Once she heard about the Troll's thievery from her older sisters though, she considered herself a very fortunate girl.

But then, her darn immune system did its job and after a week, Billie wasn't able to stay at home in her sickly, but safe bubble any longer. And trust this, it wasn't for a lack of trying. The morning saw her mummified in the warmest blankets possible, trying to bring up her temperature.

Her mother wasn't easily fooled.

So begrudgingly, though a fudge brownie usually meant for after school soften the blow some, Billie walked with her sisters to school. More accurately, she dawdled behind them, taking out her nerves and bitterness on pinecones and rocks along the way. In fact, all the sisters walked slowly, hoping to delay the looming inevitability on the horizon.

Iris was the first to reach the bridge.

Here's something you should know about Iris beside her oldest sister status and annoying chewing - she was extremely shy. (Let it also be known Iris is a firm believer that perspective alters reality, so she doesn't feel her chewing is annoying, just different.) She did everything she could to stay hidden in plain view, nothing more than a passing thought.

So when the Troll started taking parts of students' lunches, Iris was quick to comply, especially if it meant she could choose what to give him.

However, on this day, Iris was undecided. She had hoped to find the answer during her walk, but only had the intrusive thought of creating a sandwich with the help of Mother Nature. A little bark here, some pinecone for additional crunch...

She had successfully thought of a plan B.

Taking off her shoes, which would surely alert the Troll to her presence, Iris slowly made her way over the bridge. Probably not the safest idea, but splinters and tetanus seemed the lesser evil here.

Iris tiptoed across, avoiding every weak and loud spot.

Creak! Well, except that one.

"Who's creaking on my bridge?" sung the Troll, before he leapt topside. When he saw it was Iris, he grinned, knowing what delicious delights she always seemed to have. "What do you have for me today?"

"A sa-a-andwich and celery sticks." And also apple slices, something she...ahem...failed to mention.

The Troll was not impressed.

"But my sister Rosie has something better." Iris' eyes widen in shock. Why in the world did that slip out?

That got the Troll's attention.

Trevor's little lunch gathering had went well this morning, so it was only because of this, he decided to give an exception, stepping aside to let a shaking Iris by.

Rosie reached the bridge minutes after Iris went over the bridge.

Before stepping on the bridge, she bent down to make sure her shoes were tied, although it would surely not doing any good. Remember, Rosie is prone to tripping and is painfully self-aware of this flaw of hers.

So it was with great surprise when she made it across without even a stumble. Rosie was so shocked she went to walk across the bridge again to see if it was a fluke, and subsequently fell on her lunch.

"Who's...falling on my bridge?" The Troll almost sounded amused.

"Look," Rosie stood up and brushed herself off, "you'll only get a smushed smorgasbord from me. Tuna, crackers, and a piece of cake."

Trevor's stomach turned at the thought. Little did he know that Rosie would later look in her lunchbox and find her lunch quite intact.

Rosie leaned in as if she was a conspirator. "Billie's got a brownie, though. Fresh out the oven, so it's probably still warm."

So with fantasies of biting into a warm brownie, the Troll allowed Rosie to go past.

When Billie finally reached the bridge (because unfortunately, school started at the ungodly hour of 8am), she could see her sisters waiting on the other side, seemingly on the edge of their seats. Iris looked stressed, which Billie could understand, since school is stressful. It was Rosie's constipated face that caused Billie to narrow her eyes in suspicion; it was her guilty look.

Curious and frankly, no longer concerned about the matter of losing a part of her lunch, she stormed across the bridge, nearly running into the villain himself.

"Who's trip-trapping on my bridge?"

Really? "This isn't the Billy Goats Gruff, Trevor." (Except it kind of is.)

Ignoring her statement, because why would he care about some old children's story, the Troll smirked at Billie and held out his hand. "I heard you have a brownie with lunch today."

Billie was going to hurt Rosie, a common thought in Billie's head, as seems to be the case when it comes to siblings. "I'm going to eat it too."

"No you're not."

"Oh, yes I am."

Fearlessly, maybe more fueled by sibling induced anger, she shoved past Trevor. Unprepared for such a reaction, the Troll stumbled back, right through the weak bridge railing, and into the small river below.

Don't worry, the kid wasn't hurt, unless you count his pride and his bottom. He did land on it pretty hard.

From then on, Billie was considered a hero. It didn't do much to change her grumpy nature though. In fact, it made it worse some days. For whatever reason, people thought she would want to speak to them about her heroic (and mostly self-interested) actions.

She very much didn't.

Now there is a lesson to be learned here, several in fact. Jealously should never be a good reason to bully someone. A great immune system is a blessing and a curse.

But most importantly, don't ever doubt the power of a brownie. It could give you the strength you need to take on anything, including a troll.