The Secret Behind Our Names (And Why You Shouldn't Ask!)

Lyra? That’s such a lovely name!"

"Aw, thanks Jenna!"

"Wanna hear something funny?" Jenna grinned mischievously.

"Sure, hit me!" Lyra said.

"Jenna isn’t my real name. It’s just what I go by."

"Ohhh, is it short for Jennifer or maybe Genevieve?"

Jenna chuckled, "Nope! Guess again!"

"Uh... what then?" Lyra tilted her head.

"It’s short for... Mayonnaise!" Jenna burst out laughing.

"Wait, WHAT? Your full name is Mayonnaise?!" Lyra stared at her.

"Cross my heart!" Jenna giggled.

"Man, that’s gotta be tough," Lyra said.

"Tell me about it. Kids at school called me Sandwich Girl for a year!" Jenna rolled her eyes.

"At least yours is funny. People basically run when they find out what Lyra is short for," Lyra said with a nervous laugh.

"Oh, you have to tell me now!"

"Nooo, if I tell you, you might ditch me!"

"Pssh, no way! Spill it!" Jenna leaned in eagerly.

Lyra took a deep breath, her face turning red.

"Speak up! I won't bite!" Jenna teased.

Finally, Lyra squeezed her eyes shut and blurted out:

"MY FULL NAME IS DIARRHEA!"

The two girls stared at each other for a moment—then burst into hysterical laughter.

Author's Note:

This was written for the Campfire Chronicles' Funniest Name Challenge! 😂 Honestly, this is probably the most ridiculous story I’ve ever put together, but hey, the cringe was worth it!

Fun fact corner:

Katie could be short for Cavity

Mia might be short for Ammonia

Chloe could secretly be Cholera

Annie could come from Anemia

Bella? Short for Salmonella 😜

Got any more cursed name ideas? Drop them below, I’m dying to hear! 😂🔥

Would you also like a second, slightly different version — maybe a little more detailed or punchy depending on what you're aiming for? 🎯