The Rhino Revenge Deluxe

In the thickest thicket of the deepest, darkest jungle, there lived a bustling metropolis of exotic wildlife, a sort of concrete jungle without the concrete. Here, the cacophony of squawks and growls substituted for the honks of taxis, and thick vines took the place of steel skyscrapers. Among its many residents were Peryn and Atasha, the rhinoceros couple, living in a sublime cave house that was the jungle's version of a penthouse suite, complete with a mud pool for entertaining, which they fondly referred to as their "sludge jacuzzi."

They were the envy of every woodland creature, with Peryn working as a branch manager (which involved actual branches) at a thriving termite mound, and Atasha, a prominent mud bath designer. Life was simply perfect for this power couple.

One day, Peryn came home early from the mound to surprise Atasha with a fresh patch of prime mud for their pool. As she thundered into their dwelling, she found Atasha huddled in a corner, whispering into a strange, luminescent rectangle. It was a bizarre device that Peryn had only heard the parrots mockingly refer to as the "Babble-Brick."

Caught mid-babble, Atasha quickly hid the device, but not before Peryn saw a strange creature on the screen—a creature that looked suspiciously human. Peryn's heart sank. It couldn't be. But she had to know. So, she decided to dig deeper, rhino-style.

Over the next few days, Peryn spied on Atasha, trying to decipher the strange clicking language she spoke into the Babble-Brick. She discovered her worst fear: Atasha wasn't a rhino. He was a human in a convincing rhino suit, working for a notorious aviation company, "Sky Cloggers LLC."

The elaborate plot was devastating. They were planning to turn the jungle metropolis into a parking lot for defunct airplanes. Peryn felt betrayed. She couldn't let this happen.

In a dramatic showdown, amid the deafening roar of incoming planes, Peryn confronted Atasha at the edge of the tallest cliff in the jungle, known to the locals as "The Lion's Leap."

"Atasha!" she bellowed, "I know your terrible secret. You're not one of us. You're one of them!"

Atasha, or rather the human in the rhino suit, sighed heavily, and in a resigned voice said, "You're right, Peryn. I am a human. My real name is Larry. I work for Sky Cloggers. And frankly, I'm relieved. It's been exhausting pretending to enjoy rolling in mud and eating foliage."

Peryn was aghast. "But you're planning to destroy our home for some... metal birds?"

Larry shrugged. "Well, it beats being married to a rhino."

Enraged, Peryn charged at Larry, sending him over the edge of the Lion's Leap. As he fell, Larry let out a sigh of relief, echoing his final words, "At least now I won't have to copulate with a rhino anymore."

In the aftermath of Larry's demise, Peryn concocted a daring plan. She would infiltrate the human world to ensure that no such schemes could ever threaten her beloved jungle metropolis again. With the help of her animal friends, they fashioned a human suit from Larry's remains, complete with a wig made from monkey tails.

As Peryn ventured into the human world, she was astonished by their strange ways. But nothing could have prepared her for the siren call of a fast-food restaurant.

Seduced by the irresistible aroma of greasy burgers and crispy fries, Peryn couldn't resist the lure of the fast-food joint. She lumbered into the restaurant, still dressed in her makeshift human suit, and ordered enough food to feed an entire herd of rhinos.

Feasting on the delectable human concoctions, Peryn was in culinary heaven. However, she severely underestimated the capacity of her human disguise, and with one final gulp of a double cheeseburger with extra pickles, the suit split wide open, revealing her true rhino form.

The restaurant patrons screamed in horror at the sight of a full-grown rhinoceros in their midst. Hearing the commotion, the owner, who was none other than Larry's older brother, Jerry, charged out of his office in fury and was shocked and furious to see Peryn. In an act of swift retribution, he called animal control, and the poor rhino was immediately put down.

Jerry, determined to avenge his brother and showcase his bizarre encounter, had Peryn's head taxidermized and hung on the wall of his restaurant as a macabre trophy. He named his new burger creation, "The Rhino Revenge Deluxe," and it quickly became the talk of the town.

Back in the jungle metropolis, the animals mourned the loss of their hero, Peryn. As a tribute to her gastronomic downfall, they founded an annual event called "The Rhino Chomp Fest," where jungle residents gathered to gorge on massive amounts of fermented fruits and leaves. The contest winner was awarded the prestigious title of "Chomp Champion" and received a golden leaf medallion.

In honour of Peryn's bravery, a statue was erected at the base of the Lion's Leap, but with a twist – the statue depicted Peryn in her human suit, mid-bite on a massive cheeseburger.

When the prospectors from Sky Cloggers discovered the weird statue, it became a popular selfie spot for visiting jungle tourists, who couldn't resist the oddity of a rhino chowing down on a burger. The company rebranded itself as the Jungle Jumble LLC, and made a fortune from tourists visiting the statue and the thermal mudbaths, ultimately using most of it to defend and nurture the rainforest that now provided its good fortune.

Jerry won the catering rights to the jungle paradise.