The Library Remembers

Sarah breathed a sigh of relief; it was still there. She took a step towards it, but a hand grabbed her shoulder and impeded her movement. She turned and saw Matt’s deep green eyes staring at her incredulously.

“What are you smiling about?” he asked.

“It’s still there,” she said, turning again to face it. She knew what Matt was about to say.

“Yes, and it’s barely standing! Half of it’s caving in, and all the buildings around it have already given way. You can’t be serious.”

“Yes, and those buildings cozied up against it are providing the perfect support. It’s the New York Public Library, we have to go in!

“We can barely even see the doors.”

“Yes, but you CAN see them. We’ll just clear some rubble aside and squeeze in for a quick peek. There’s bound to be hundreds of books that survived the blast.”

“More books? That’s all you ever care about. Don’t you have enough already?”

Matt glanced down at her dirty backpack. Most of the fabric was stretched to capacity by the books she had gathered today. She had to hunch over to carry it.

“It’s all I have,” she said quietly before taking a step into the debris in front of her. She led the way towards the library doors, carving out a path for Matt on her way. She didn’t have to look back; she knew he’d be following her.

She only suffered a few scrapes before reaching the front doors. She took off her backpack and started moving large pieces of rubble that were too dirty and ashen to discern their material.

Even with Matt helping her, it took a while to unblock the doors enough to open them. She wasn’t sure exactly how long, because she had broken her watch crawling into a store earlier in the day. She wasn’t too worried. One of the bodies inside might have a replacement.

She used all her might to pry the door open enough to fit her slender frame and used a brick to keep it ajar. She stepped inside and took note of the broken glass lining the floor. She started to question whether this was a good idea when she noticed the artwork in the distance.

Most of the walls were cracked and some parts of the ceiling were caving in, but she only had eyes for the magnificent books and paintings that were scattered across the room. She imagined the librarians would be turning in their graves if they saw the mess inside, but luckily, she didn’t see any bones … yet.

“Last chance to back out,” said Matt, gazing up at the ceiling and shaking slightly.

“It always amazes me that I’m the brave one,” said Sarah, gingerly stepping into the room and walking towards another pile of books in front of her. They were nestled beneath one of the shelves, all of which had tumbled to the floor in various configurations around the room.

She picked one up and blew off the dust, relieved that there weren’t any spiders or cockroaches hidden inside. She had enough of those for the day … for a lifetime if she were being honest. She wiped the rest of it off with the back of her hand until she could see the title.

“Britannica Ten,” she said with a sigh, “How boring. I’ve learned enough about what this world was like, quite frankly, I’d rather get lost in a different one.”

She turned and saw Matt reaching down into a pile further ahead. He lifted a book up and showed it to her. “How about this one: How to put that book down for once and go live a little.”

“Very funny,” she said before changing her tone, “And what is there to go live for? There’s nothing but me, you, and the worlds in these pages. That’s all we have left.”

“You don’t know that,” said Matt, tossing the book aside and receiving a nasty glare from Sarah, “Don’t worry … Spanish Dictionary.”

She relented her gaze and hurried ahead. It didn’t take long for them to find some titles that piqued her interest: The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, Ender’s Game, Artemis Fowl, and most importantly, The Fellowship of the Ring.

She held the last one up proudly so that Matt could see, “Ha! And you told me to go ahead and read The Two Towers first,” she said, jokingly, “Well who looks stupid now? I told you I’d find it.”

“Is that why you put our lives in danger? So, you could gloat in my face?” he said, unable to control his smile, “I can’t lie. I’m excited to read it with you.”

“I’ll take that as a thank you,” she said before combing through another pile of books. She imagined it was much easier before the blast … when things were neatly ordered by author and alphabet. Then again, they also had real, live people that could assist you if you had trouble. At least that’s what it was like in her books.

After a few hours of browsing, the fading sun creeped through the broken windows, indicating they need to be home soon. They tiptoed back to the front of the library, but something in the corner of the room caught Sarah’s eye. With a cocked head, she tiptoed over to it, just able to see the different shading between debris and … bone.

She bent down slowly, as though it could come back to life any second and started to clear some of the wood and ash that lay atop the corpse.

“What are you doing?” asked Matt, staring at her from the entrance, ready to leave. He was always extra careful to get home before dark.

“Lost my watch earlier … figured it was worth a try,” replied Sarah, digging through the clutter.

The person hadn’t been wearing a watch, not that it would have been in-tact anyway, but something else was glimmering against the skeleton’s torso; a heart-shaped locket. She wasn’t particularly interested in jewelry, but this piece caught her eye. She couldn’t believe how pristine it looked, even after everything that had happened. It was like a lone tree standing in the forest after a storm.

Without even thinking, she lifted it over the skeleton’s head, avoiding the cruel gaze of the skull’s empty sockets, before turning to face Matt.

“I don’t think that’ll tell time,” said Matt, studying it from afar. As he peered, she saw his countenance change and she could tell he was just as enchanted as she was. He walked over to her as she pinched beneath the two silver clasps and pried it open.

It was a photograph of a man and a woman. He was wearing a fine, black tuxedo and she was dressed in a white ballroom gown. Based on previous images Sarah had seen, it looked like something from the 1950s, well over a hundred years before the blast. She was ready to shut it and move on with her day when she noticed something peculiar; the couple’s stern faces slowly turned into cheerful smiles and the image became brighter.

Matt started to whisper something to her, but she didn’t listen. She watched on with amazement as the couple started waving at her, gesturing her to come closer. She leaned in towards the locket, and when she looked up, she was no longer in the library.

Instead, she was in a large ballroom. Fancy chandeliers hung down from vast ceilings, glittering against the fancy plates and silverware that lined the circular tables around the room. In the middle of the hall, dozens of people were dressed in similar outfits as the couple in the picture. They danced in circles around the room. She had read about the dance before; they called it a waltz.

She noticed Matt out of the corner of her eyes, he looked scared and excited at the same time. Sarah wasn’t sure how to feel.

“It’s like out of The Great Gatsby,” she whispered over to Matt, nervous that her voice would break the enchantment. Music played for a few more seconds before they were whisked away to another place.

She first noticed the extraordinary colors. She had seen them all individually during her travels, but she never got to see them together like this, some of them flying around in circles through the air. They were outside with hundreds of people in a field filled with food, animals, and amusement rides.

“We’re at a carnival,” said Sarah, matter of factly, “Like the book The State Fair.”

Her mouth hung open wide and her eyes didn’t blink as she watched what most undoubtedly was a Ferris wheel loop in circles hundreds of feet above their heads. She knew lots of things were that high before the blast, but she had never seen one that moved before. It was beautiful.

She didn’t get to watch too long. Soon they were inside a tent, where a man was thrashing his whip at a tiger. There was also a woman in scantily clad clothing contorting her body on top of a majestic elephant.

“Like Water for Elephants,” she whispered.

“I didn’t like that one,” said Matt, “Too sad.”

“Indeed,” said Sarah, shaking the locket in her hand, “Next please.”

Seconds later they were in a large, outdoor stadium, surrounded by more people than they could ever imagine. There was a deafening noise near the bottom of the arena. Although it was painful to their ears, which were used to silence, everyone around them seemed to enjoy it. They bobbed their heads in unison as a few words lingered in the air all around them, “AND WEEEEE.”

They didn’t get to hear any more of it. Instead, they were whisked away to a dark room. Hundreds of people in fancy clothing were evenly separated throughout. It took Sarah a moment to notice they were all staring at a person on the stage in front of them. Soft, calming music echoed out from beneath the stage.

“A Broadway theater,” she said quietly. She had always wanted to see one of them. She had read Hamilton and found music from Phantom of the Opera. It didn’t take her long to figure out this was Les Misérables. She thought it was fitting that the woman on stage was singing about dreaming a dream.

Tears started to flow down her face as she watched on, mesmerized like the audience around her. When the song ended, she was back in the library, clutching onto the locket.

“Thank you,” she whispered to it.

“That was amazing,” said Matt.

Sarah stared at it for a few more seconds, admiring the stern couple’s photograph, before throwing the locket against the wall as hard as she could. It broke instantly.

“Why would you do that!” screamed Matt.

Sarah wiped her eyes. “Because it was too vivid. I could feel everything. I could smell everything. I could see everything that I’ve ever wanted … but it wasn’t real.”

“You’d rather get lost in your books than experience it in person?”

“Yes because …. because books don’t make me miss the real thing. Books take me away,” said Sarah, pausing briefly, “And this took me back. I don’t want that. I want fakeness, I want to forget. I want imaginary.”

Matthew paused and nodded his head, “Like me.”

Another tear rolled down Sarah’s face. “Yes, like you.”

He didn’t say anything else. Instead, Matt’s imaginary body started to slowly disappear from the room and from her mind.

“It was good while it lasted,” she said, knowing he’d be back soon. She couldn’t take being alone for too long.

She reached into her bag and grabbed one of her books before sitting down on the floor.

“You’ll have to do for now,” she said quietly. Her stomach started to turn, and her heart started to race as the silence crept in once again.