That's Why I'm Late

Let me start off by saying that it’s not my fault. I mean, I know it looks bad but let me explain.

At some point in the middle of the night the storm knocked out the lights. This was a huge storm. Normally, I can sleep through a storm. This one woke me up. The explosion when lightening struck the house was massive. The house was lit up like it was daytime, although it was midnight. I got out of the bed to make sure everything was ok. You know, sometimes when it rains very hard, the roof leaks in the corner of the dining room. I didn’t see any water there, but I placed a bucket under it anyway. I don’t even remember going back to bed.

I woke up at 8:15 in the morning since the alarm did not go off. It should have got me up at 5:00, but what can I say, no power. My wife had already gone to work. She didn’t wake me up. I got up and took a shower, but the water was cold since the water heater is electric. No power, no hot water. I tried to cook something for breakfast, but the stove is electric. So, I left out to work with nothing to eat.

I got in the car, but it wouldn’t start. I left our electric car charging all night. It didn’t dawn on me at first, but with no power, the car didn’t charge. Fortunately, I had a portable charger that had enough power to let me drive the 10 miles to work. My plan was to charge the car in the company garage.

Halfway to work, I stopped at the donut shop to get something to eat. I was starving at that point. Can’t work on an empty stomach. However, I couldn't pay because I left my wallet at home. I had to go back to the house. I can’t drive without my driver’s license. I can’t get into the job without my ID. The house was cold when I got back. The furnace has an electric ignition. No electricity, no heat.

I did the only thing I knew to do. I turned on the stove and used a match to light it. I knew that this would keep the house nice and warm. With the heat issue solved I grabbed my wallet and left out to work again. I got to the donut shop, but it was being robbed. I was able to see it through the door. I called the police and had to wait until they got there to give my report. The only good thing from this is that I got free donuts.

I drove off and realized that the car was running out of gas. I was able to make it to the nearest station before it stopped on me. I got out of the car ready to pump the gas. At that point, 3 armed men with mask pushed me aside, hopped in the van and drove away. Once again, I found myself talking to the police. I gave them a description of the 3 men and the vehicle. They went chasing after them.

I had to walk back home. I was going to use my wife’s car, but first I had to go inside and use the bathroom. Shortly after I stepped inside, the electricity came back on. This created a spark that ignited the gas from the stove. Now my house was on fire. I had to call the fire department. They were able to save the house. Insurance will take care of the damage. But I found myself talking to the police a third time. They wanted to make sure it wasn’t arson. I was going to call but I left my phone in the van. After that, I got in my wife’s car and came to work. That’s why I’m late.