Teamed Up?

Falling water splashed onto the stones and created a wondrous whooshing sound.

“Well, we’re officially a merger. The greatest blend of corporations in American history, at least in terms of figures, is here. A company now with a market capitalization of twenty-six trillion dollars is at hand.” Champagne popped.

Akra Odon the newly minted CTO and CEO Farrah Crumpington raised their hands in the air. They walked behind the curtain still heady off of the audience cheering.

“You’re a bastard,” Akra said.

“I know,” Crumpington replied.

“I mean it. You’re both going to ruin this company,” Akra said.

“That may be likely, but I’ll be damned if I let that happen,” Crumpington fired back.

“You’ve driven six companies into the ground, you’ve fired more than you’ve hired, you’ve been fired twice from CEO, and now you feel you can be the leader of Juggernaut Analytics. What do you have to say about yourself?”

“I do.”

“What?”

“I do know all of what you just said and it doesn’t mean my future is like that.”

“‘Past performance is the best predictor’….”

“Yes, but I’ve got the best thing: ideas.”

“So?”

“So, while people roll around in the filth of their own nonsense, I stand on the knowledge of my own capabilities. So like I said, ‘I do.’”

Akra scoffed. She crossed her legs and sipped some champagne.

“You’re a goddamn highway robber. Worse than those goddamn robber barons. You milked the other companies for all they were worth. You obliged yourself to become the philosopher king, wave your ass so we can all smell your stink. You refuse to get in the pockets of Washington at the expense of the public; you’ve totalled all of your credit up with buying farmland and you envision to stake your claim on asteroids and the Moon. Go to Mars, why don’t ya?!” She gulped on some more of her drink.

“You should really slow down.”

“What? I’ve got a chauffeur.”

“Slow down, I mean, on pointing out fallacies. It is true that I never begged for a penny from a bureaucrat or allowed myself to slum and give them my money. I buy up farmland to hedge against inflation. And as far as space, goddamn ‘sky’s the limit.’ I want to own what I can earn. I will continue to produce no matter what creature is in office, what farmer may wish to hold onto his land if he shows signs of dishonesty, and space is to be conquered.”

Akra burped. “I still think…I still think you’re going to run this company into the ground. I know you’re going to be the shining light. Everyone’s going to say you’re the savior. You’ll continue to be asked to talk at commencement ceremonies and collect more honorary doctorates. So what? You’re my boss, yeah. I don’t like you, though. I respect you, but I don’t like you.”

“That’s understood. I can see you as a CEO one day. You can seriously take over the reins. You have enough stock in this company to buy a country the size of Delaware. What you ought to be doing is preparing for that glorious day. You should be gearing up right now to keep your nose in the balance books and your head to every deposit you receive. Retrieve the soul you once had. Get rid of the bitterness.”

“Phew! Are you done? I know that you’re going to screw it up now. I don’t have to be this way but it’s all I can be. When you break down the deal, how do you live with yourself?”

“How couldn’t I?”