Storming the Castle

“So, what's the plan?”

The mill was dark, the sunset filtering through the slits barely enough to illuminate the grain bags. It wasn't a problem, every single one of them could see in the darkness.

The Fox jumped off a pile of crates and landed on his human feet. His long tawny hair shone even in that dim light. “We have to get the leprechaun's hat tonight. The client is anxious.”

“He hasn't seen it for years. Day more, day less, what difference does it make?” The Cat planted one of her boots on a box; the boots were the only thing visible, her black fur fading into the background.

“The hat was stolen three years ago by a ragged wizard,” the Fox explained. “He used to have a stall of love potions in the market, you wouldn't have given him the time of day. Now you know him by the name of Lord Oz.”

“That Lord Oz?” growled a voice. “That bastard is as clever as f–”

The Fox narrowed his eyes at him.

"Viper. As a viper, Kit."

Tzk, you turn your life upside down and yet end up hearing the same old prejudices. Kit wisely decided to let the matter drop. “That's him. Oz used the hat to create fake money, with which he acquired the castle. He turned it into a casino and became the most famous magician in the country. Her Royal Kittiness has already infiltrated herself as a croupier,” the Fox indicated his historic partner in crime; they were in cahoots since 1883.

In lieu of the feline, there was now a woman with voluptuous shapes and skin as black as the cat fur. “At 11 pm Oz appears in the room to say hello and give away coins – all fake, obviously – then he retires to the bar. But what he wears on his head is not the leprechaun's hat, it's a copy. The real one is in a room on the top floor, guarded by two orcs.”

“Leave them to me.” From the shadows emerged a colossus of muscles, with gray and feral eyes.

Kit nodded. “We rely on you, Bud.”

˜*˜

Laughter, a cascade of chips, jazz music in the background. Around the Black Jack's table the tension was very high. They had all already hit the jackpot, everyone except the seventh dwarf and the Blue Fairy. The two looked at each other warily.

The dwarf asked for another card and barked: “I stay.”

They revealed their hands: eighteen for the dealer, sixteen for Blue and for the dwarf... twenty-one. He laughed with satisfaction, grabbing the bets from the table. The croupier's hand shot out to lock around his wrist.

“Wait.” She took a card from his waistcoat pocket. “What's this?”

The dwarf turned red. She signaled security.

“That isn't mine!” he snapped, as the guards approached. “Wait! It's not mine!”

The Cat looked up. From the back of the room, Bud nodded and took advantage of the chaos to pass the door marked restricted area.

He climbed several flights of stairs on padded feet and arrived at a door guarded by two greenish thugs.

“How you get here? No, you no come in!”

“I must have gotten lost.” His body began to shrink, his joints to dislocate, and his skin sprouted gray fur.

“Oh, shid,” the other orc whimpered.

The Big Bad Wolf leaped.

˜*˜

“Beyond the door there is a delicate system of magical and non-magical traps, triggered by invisible wires and pressure on the floor,” the Cat continued. “The hat is in a safe on the other side of the room, locked by a special mechanism.”

The Fox looked up. “This is where you come in, Anansi.”

The large spider that was dangling from a beam dropped to the ground. A lanky man, wrapped in a pinstriped suit, stood up. “I'm an expert in wires. What could go wrong?”

The Cat moaned. “You really had to say it.”

˜*˜

“Wait a minute...” The Blue Fairy slowly got up from the table, scrutinizing the croupier carefully for the first time. “I know you”.

“Uh no, I just have one of those faces, you know.”

“You're the Cat. Puss in Boots!”

She hissed a curse. That fairy had been a thorn in her side since she was written.

“Guards, this woman is a swindler! I'm sure that around here there’s also her Fox friend and they have something in mind.”

“Damn Spider, he jinxed us.” With a leap she resumed her feline form. She ran across the table and crashed through the back door like a bullet.

Bud saw her come screeching along. “What’s wrong?” The two orcs lay on the ground, unconscious and bleeding.

“They caught me. Anansi?”

“Doing his dance”.

And indeed the Spider seemed to hover among invisible threads, barely touching the floor, which did not perceive its negligible weight. He was already halfway through and in less than a minute he reached the farthest side, where he got his front paws into the lock.

˜*˜

“What if something really goes wrong?” Bud eyed the Fox.

“Everyone meets upstairs. Her Kittiness will find an excuse to slip away without attracting attention. Try not to separate.”

“How are we leaving?”

Kit's almond-shaped eyes closed into two smiling commas. “I'll take care of that.”

˜*˜

Clack! The safe opened. The Spider transformed into a human above it, grabbed the hat and sent it flying like a Frisbee out of the room. He returned in arachnid form and began the reverse path.

A loud mix of voices and stomping feet came from the stairs.

“Hurry up!” she meowed.

Bud cracked his knuckles. Four guards burst into the hallway. As the Wolf threw his first punches, someone knocked on the window. The Cat became a woman again to reopen it. Outside the Fox was floating on a flying carpet.

“Where did you get that?” She threw the hat at him. Kit put it on his head.

“A Genie owed me a favor. Everyone get in your animal form, jump in.”

Bud transformed, but waited until the others were all on board before joining them. When they left the castle, in their wake there was no one left standing.

Her Kittiness took the hat off her partner's head. “Do we really have to give it back?”

“Yeah”. The Fox sighed. “But that doesn't mean we can't use it in the meantime.”