Specter

I met him under strange circumstances when I was 13. By strange I mean one minute he wasn't there, the next he was. He had black hair that hung down to his shoulders, dark hazel eyes framed by long lashes, an angular face, pixie nose, thin pink lips, and medium build. He was average in almost every respect of the word, other than his skin which was pale as virgin snow. He wore a black hoodie, black skinny jeans, and a dark grey long sleeved shirt, his feet were bare.

I was alone in my bedroom when he showed up, and if memory serves correctly, it was sometime in the winter and I had been trying to concentrate on studying for a test when I looked up from my book and saw him sitting at the foot of my bed. I was on the floor. When I looked at him, it was almost as though I had known him all my life. Like he had always been there, as though he were a close friend and not a stranger. He offered me a small smile and I smiled back at him. He was about to speak when my father called for me from upstairs, telling me that dinner was ready.

I didn't want to go, but I knew I had to. It was one of the last meals my family would have together before my parents got a divorce.

"I'll be right here when you come back." The stranger told me with a reassuring smile and a soft voice.

When I returned, he was waiting for me. Ever since then, we were inseparable. He followed me to school, and kept me company when I was alone. We would talk for hours about music, or about the latest school projects I had to do. As I grew, he grew with me, but his appearance never changed. He grew a little taller and his voice grew a little deeper, but that was the extent of the changes he went through.

I graduated high school and he followed me when I moved in with my father. He was there every night I cried myself to sleep. He was there to hold my hand every time I was berated or treated harshly. He was there when I contemplated taking the selfish way out, and he was there to talk me out of it. He was always there when I needed him, and I loved him for it. He was my best friend, my only friend at times, and even today he's still there for me, but he seems to be fading.

I now have a fiancé who does everything that the stranger would, and now we have a baby on the way. I never knew the stranger's name, and calling him a stranger leaves a bad taste in my mouth. He was never a stranger though I never knew what he was or his name. I guess he was some sort of guardian or spirit guide. My mother might have called him a guardian angel, but that title doesn't feel right either. He was something special, and he helped me make it this far. I know that as I grow and change, he'll continue to be there if I need him. I was never alone, and he made sure that I never knew what loneliness was.

He told me that I was beautiful on days where I felt the opposite, he built me up when I would tear myself down. He offered me encouragement when I needed it most, but the most important thing he did for me, was tell me to never give up on life. He told me that things would get better, that I would eventually find a reason to keep going, but to hold on until then. Now that I have found my reason, now that I am a young adult, now that I have a great life, I can feel him slipping away. I know that he won't leave me completely, I don't know if he can, but I do know this: if I ever need a friend, if I ever feel alone, he'll be there to remind me of all that I've got and that I'll never be alone again.