Social shock

I am a glow stick in a world filled with lamps and flashlights. I was never created to fit in. I didn’t come into the world with a matching set of parents like everybody else. I came into the world with the absence of my father and years later my mother also decided to leave. I was alone in a world that wasn’t created to understand me. For example, everyone saw the sadness in the world. I never could see the sadness. Even in a world filled with darkness, I always saw the light. Maybe it was because I was built differently. I was not your usual yellow light. I didn’t come with a bulb and I didn’t break easily when you dropped me. I wasn’t like everyone else. Everyone else ran on batteries. A lot of times their batteries would die quickly and they would lose their light. I was different, I was a glow stick. I loved who I was but sometimes I just wanted to be like everyone else. Sometimes I just wanted to fit in. At one point I was trying everything. I tried to hangout with others who didn’t really care about me, but then I would care too much because they were all I had. I just wanted to feel like I belonged. I tried dating different guys and trying different hobbies so I wouldn’t feel alone. I didn’t mind being by myself, but I didn't like to be left alone with my thoughts. It just never felt like there was a place just for me. I thought maybe I wasn’t meant to be a glow stick, so I tried to learn Morse code and tape batteries on me. However, I just could never be like everyone else and they always reminded me with their consistent mockery. They would mock me because I wasn’t always chosen first. They would mock me because I looked different than them. They even mocked me for always smiling. I began to question who I was and started asking myself, “ Why don’t they pick me? Why do I look like this? Stop smiling! Why am I even here?”

They broke me. Most glow sticks shine brighter when you break them. I did at first until I stopped glowing and they still kept trying to break me. I love being a glow stick but I don’t like being the only one. It makes it hard to fit in when you don’t feel like you belong. The only place that accepts me is the darkness. It used to be the place where I shined the brightest, but now it’s my place to hide. I began thinking after I cried the last of my juice away, “ I don’t want anyone else to feel this way. I may be the only glow stick, but I am not the only one hurting. I will do what no one did for me! I will be there for them. I may never glow my vibrant colors again, but at least I get to help others find their light again!” I ran home and I started doing research on how to help others feel better about themselves. I wanted to help others in every possible way. I learned the best way to help others was to help myself in the process. I decided to stop trying to fit in. I had something better to do. I did not have to shine a yellow light or become a flashlight to fit in. I didn’t have to do anything but be myself. I smile because I am happy. I am so happy being me. I look different because I am different. They don’t pick me because they don’t want me and that’s okay by me. However, they always pick my store because now everyone is lining up to shine bright vibrant colors like me.