Snakes on a Pole

2004: We split. You take our knowledge, I take our desire. The brain and heart metaphor is somewhat apt. Other parts remain neutral or retain sovereignty, and reluctantly aid us both. The separation seeming both involuntary and undesirable (particularly on my end), our spirits long for unfractionation, and tug on each other.

2005: I observe our music being published with your mouth and your name. I don't even discern that it's ours, proving my mind's weakness. I simply become fascinated with harmonic pings, and then you publish music with harmonic pings as a central focus soon after. Some of it is truly disparaging to me. I lack the mental willpower and health to make it myself. I lack even the mind to acknowledge the venom in your lyrics. I simply admire the songwriting and creativity. Blood flows from the heart to the brain.

2008: Multiple love interests float past me. I feel the passion, and yet take no action. I know this isn't right behavior for me, but I hide, knowing subconsciously that I'm sick and shouldn't inflict it on others.

Your reach grows longer and larger, as it should.

2009: I eat hallucinogenic mushrooms to assault my numbness, and an epiphany about my doomed inaction leads to depression and mental growth. I start to recognize your temporary victory in the spiritual tug of war, but I can't put it into words. My mind is still lacking, but my heart awakens. You achieve amazing success for a strange musician. Where is all my ambition and willpower?

2011: I win a companion, a beautiful girl who shows me kindness. I finally begin to manifest my desires and my hopes. Your writing and publishing slow to a trickle.

2014: My beautiful companion moves to a new city to start a life with me. I have her, but I don't have my undefiled spirit. Stagnation and disappointment result. "For what shall it profit a man," to make love to a goddess, without his own soul or mind?

We see you play a show, with the alleged rival (more on that later), and one of the songs is new. I decide it's a great song. The alleged rival says it's bad.

2018: Our spirits intersect for a moment in Lake County, Florida.

Suddenly, our spirit reminds me that the alleged rival is our first officer, our lieutenant, and not my rival as the darkness surrounding us insists.

I weep and lament our lack of reaction to said darkness. He listens politely, and points out that we're under the influence of hallucinogenic mushrooms, which isn't the time for such a talk.

2020: Hindsight knocks at the door, and I answer it. I start to tug harder. The poles reverse, and my pull wins. My spirit now wins the tug of war. Blood returns to the heart from the brain.

2021: My anger at the people I see as your enablers bursts outward like solar flares. I unintentionally lash out at friend and foe alike.

You start to please me and aid me instead of mocking and taking.

My companion, my goddess, loses her luster in my eyes, after refusing to assert our liberty. We grow apart.

You seem to embrace her worst qualities as I reject them.

2022: The physical forms you wear begin to resemble the cruelty you delivered to me and others. I take pleasure in your company regardless.

2023: I start to honor principles I always believed in but didn't actually attempt. I learn music theory, persist in my fitness regime, and attempt to help other people in distress. I nurse a homeless woman back to health and solvency.

Your silence is deafening.

2025: I visit the capitol building in the city where we saw you play. I now see one of your favorite symbols in a centrally located decoration. Was it our nearness that made it so prominent? I now have the mental agility to observe that I see you more, and reflections being in fact a reversal, you must see me less.

2026: I carry on this trajectory, and I worry about what it means, if our paths are negatively correlated.

I learn, I grow, I quell the weakness.

Conclusive questions:

Can parallel lines draw nearer and farther apart?

Are the planets' orbits elliptical and not circular because their fondness of the sun oscillates like a wave?

How does a double helix end?

Do we want to continue our 180° phase difference?