Pennificence

Penny knew that Ralph should be home with the kids by the time she got there. He had arranged his schedule so that all this school year he got done with work at three in the afternoon so he could pick them up. He also took them to school in the morning. He was pretty much kid-erific—strict, but also a lot of fun. He had boundaries to keep them safe, doing well in school, & playing nicely with others. But within those boundaries he allowed for a lot of wiggle-room. He rarely got rattled with them.

But tonight she was rattled by the fact that his car was not in the garage. With the storm that was about to hit she wanted everyone safe & under one roof—their roof. She parked her car & made a beeline for the door, hoping to find a message inside that would tell her where they were.

She turned on the lights in the kitchen & checked the counter. No note. She checked the living room, bedrooms, bathrooms & basement. No note. She was just getting ready to call his office when she heard the garage door opening. She wanted to run to the door & ask where they’d been, but she thought she better take a few moments & collect herself. She leaned against the kitchen counter with both hands & tried breathing deeply.

When she heard the kids at the door (a touch before she was ready), she turned to greet them. Timmy & Rose came bursting through from the garage & ran straight for her, shouting, “Mommy, Mommy, look at what Daddy bought us!”

Timmy was already holding out a noise maker & party hat for her to see, which made Rose put on a pouty face.

“Timmy! I wanted to show first!” she complained.

“I’m sorry, Rose. You show her how it works.” Timmy was the best big brother a little sister ever had. Penny only worried that he might be too nice to her & make her spoiled.

Rose’s face immediately brightened as she put one end of the noise maker in her mouth & blew as hard as she could. The coiled paper at the other end immediately straightened to its full length, smacking Penny across her cheek which made all three of them laugh. She scooped them into her arms & hugged them dearly.

“I was so worried when I got home & you weren’t here,” she gushed as she kissed them both & tousled their hair.

“Daddy took us to the store after school, but he swore us not to tell,” Timmy replied.

“And we don’t have any school tomorrow, or the next day, or the next! Not for the whole week!” Rose proclaimed triumphantly. “So, we get to stay up as late as we want tonight ‘cause we don’t have to get up in the morning! Daddy said so!”

“Oh, he did, did he?” Penny smiled as she stood to welcome Ralph home with a hug & a kiss (no cheeks involved where Ralph was concerned; it was right on the lips).

“Ooo, gross!” both kids laughed & squealed at the same time, squishing up their faces.

“You’re home early,” Ralph said as he set a pair of pizza boxes down on the counter. She assumed they were still full the way he’d been holding them. “I really thought we’d beat you. We had nothing but green lights all the way.”

“Yeah, I hit a few reds. But who cares when no one else is on the streets?”

“You naughty girl,” he grinned at her. “But so how are you already home? You didn’t have to work until five?”

“Murray closed the office early because of the storm. He wanted to make sure everyone got home safely. He’s gotta be the best boss ever. You know, if I’d met him first, you’d have had a little competition!”

“Oh really?” Ralph looked at her slyly. Attempting to appear thoughtful, looking up & rubbing his chin, he continued, “So then I’d have been stuck with Marge? Yeah, I could see that. That could’ve worked.”

She slapped him playfully on his shoulder, then grabbed him & kissed him again, this time a little more deeply.

“C’mon, guys, get a room!” Timmy complained, starting to squirm & blush as though he had been the one who just got kissed by a girl.

“Yeah, get a room!” Rose parroted. Penny guessed they’d picked that up watching tv. She might have to monitor their viewing time a little more closely, she chuckled to herself.

“So, where were you?” Penny asked, still holding him close.

“Shall we tell her, my two little co-conspirators?” Ralph asked.

“Yeah, let’s tell her,” Rose said excitedly, pulling on the side of her daddy’s pants. “Can I tell her, please, please?”

“Yes, you may, Rose. Go ahead.”

Rose turned toward her mom, looking down with a serious look on her face & shifting her weight back & forth from one foot to the other, the way she did when she wanted to remember something special & say it right.

“Daddy said that we should throw you a party because of all the nice things you do for us & that we shouldn’t tell you because we wanted it to be a surprise.”

“We’ve been planning & working on it all last week,” Ralph told her, shaking his head & with a helpless kind of smile stretching across his face. “And of all days, today is when you come home early.” Turning to the kids, he asked, “Well, do you think we should show her what we’ve been doing?”

“Yeah,” Timmy answered as he began looking through the bag his dad was holding in his other hand. Rose went over & looked in the bag, too, though she waited (anxiously) for her brother to find what he was looking for. When he found it, he pulled it from the bag & handed it to his sister. It was a colorful circle made of cardboard with something written on it.

“Go ahead, walk it across to the other side of the kitchen—slowly, so your brother can get hold of the other end & Mommy can read it.” Both Timmy & Rose had that look of wonder & awe on their faces most parents only get to see at Christmastime when the kids are young. They stretched out the banner for Penny to read, hardly able to contain their excitement. It said:

********** PENNIFICENCE **********

TO THE BEST & MOST MAGICAL

MOTHER IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD

WE LOVE YOU!

Penny’s eyes began to well up with tears as she knelt with one knee on the kitchen floor, held out her arms to her kids & said, “You guys are the best.” Rose jumped right into her arms. Timmy walked over a little more casually, gave her a hug & said, “We mean it, Mom. You really are the best.”

Rose leaned back & reached for her father. “Gimme it, Daddy! Gimme so I can show her the rest!”

“What do we say, sweetheart?” Ralph countered.

Rose put on her best irritated look, hands on her hips, still in her mother’s arms, & said with utter impatience & wide glaring eyes, “Will you gimme it, PLEASE, Daddy, so I can show Mommy the rest?”

Ralph couldn’t help but chuckle as he handed an object to Rose over her mother’s shoulder so that she couldn’t see until Rose showed her.

“We got ‘Maleficent’ so we could watch it together tonight!” she exclaimed, holding the disc package so close to her mother’s face there was no way she could read it. Timmy couldn’t help but smile as he watched his sister telling Mom everything she knew. He knew that he would do anything for her. She was his little sister.

Penny stood up, holding Rose in one arm while keeping her other arm around Timmy’s shoulder.

“We got both movies,” Ralph started filling in the gaps. “We’ve got Hawaiian pizza, because we know it’s your favorite, & pepperoni for them. I figured they could have sodas from the fridge while we ate pizza & we could share a bottle of bubbly I’ve got in the car.”

“You took them to a liquor store?” Penny teased, their lips so close they were all but kissing again.

“And a video store. I thought it would make for a nice family night, you know, with the storm outside & all.”

He was a hopeless romantic. Lucky for him, she was too.

Timmy was already on a stool getting plates out of the cupboard & handing them to Rose who put them on the kitchen table. Next came the plastic cups for them. When it came to the champagne glasses, Timmy turned to his dad & asked, “These ones, Daddy?”

“Close,” Ralph answered. “They’re the next ones back. That’s right. Those are the ones.” Ralph & Penny stood there with their arms around each other, watching as their two hosts prepared the feast. Hauling the two-liter bottles of pop out of the fridge & hoisting them onto the table was quite a feat for Rose. They were almost as big as she was.

Timmy asked his dad, “You want me to go out & get the bottle of ‘bubbly’, Dad?”

“Sure,” Ralph replied. “And then we can hang Mommy’s banner in the living room before we get our food & start the movie.” He couldn’t help but think how Timmy was growing up so fast as he watched him head to the car.

The kids set their plates & cups on the floor & laid down in front of the tv. Yes, they were on carpet &, yes, both Ralph & Penny knew that something would get spilled. But they had carpet cleaner. Wasn’t that what it was for?

Penny & Ralph set up tray tables for their food, then curled up on the couch together. It was almost as though they were in a Hallmark® card with a blizzard raging outside, the family gathered in a cozy living room, kids laughing & playing together, mom & dad cuddling & loving one another. You almost expected the Budweiser® Clydesdales to come clomping up the street.

(I know it’s a different company & a different commercial, but the feeling’s the same. There are others we could add to the mix. For example, anything with a Norman Rockwell painting. What was the one with coffee in the morning? Kids arriving home, using a can opener to pop open a brand-new can of…, Folger’s®? Was that the name of it? “The best part of waking up…?)

They weren’t even fifteen minutes into the second movie before the kids were sound asleep on the floor. Ralph carried Timmy while Penny gathered Rose & put them to bed, kissing both on the forehead. They stood in the doorway & watched them for a while. They were good kids. So long as Rose didn’t get spoiled & turn into a brat!

They walked back to the living room & turned off the tv. They could watch the second movie tomorrow night. They turned out the lights, opened the drapes, sat together on the couch & watched the snow. It was amazing. Huge clusters of snowflakes falling so heavily they could see the snow on the ground getting deeper. And the wind so strong they could feel the house shudder.

She fell asleep right there with her head on his lap, watching the snow. And he wasn’t about to move from that spot. He was right where he wanted to be.

As he laid his head back & closed his eyes, one tune kept running through his mind. He had no idea why or what it was from, but he couldn’t get it out of his head.

“The best part of waking up….”