Packages

Skyler held the white Amazon package in his hands gingerly staring at the name on the package: Sharon Jones. It had only been a week since he had lost his wife, but the packages kept rolling in. Skyler imagined by the weight and size of it that it probably contained some kitchen gadget he had no use for. His gut seemed to churn and his heart dropped thinking about how many more packages would show up over the next few weeks donning her name. Packages intended to turn their average, newly purchased home into a home mimicking her pristine Pinterest boards.

Opening the door, Skyler was bombard by their Great Dane, Ogre whose tongue sloppily slathered his chin with dripping dog drool. His greeting was greatly appreciated, but he missed his wife. He missed how he would come home to hear her berating some teammate via Zoom, trying to nudge her out of a deal or chastising someone for making a misogynistic comment while bragging how she was crashing the patriarchy in the company one little, idiot man at a time. Sharon always spoke her mind and never backed down except when it came to Ogre. She let him get away with murder, even if that meant a sloppy kiss to the face that sometimes smudged her makeup.

Skyler threw the package into the pile of other unopened packages he planned to donate. He didn’t see the need in opening them. It just hurt too much to imagine the life and the world where these objects would have been used by his beautiful, boisterous wife because that world was no longer a reality. Reaching for a glass and a bottle of whiskey, Skyler was interrupted by the snout of his large beast and companion. Ogre stared and dropped the leash at his owner’s feet. When nothing happened, Ogre let out a low yowl dropping his front half to the ground, butt wagging wildly.

Skyler put the glass and bottle down, stooping to wrap his arms around his buddy, “Okay. Let’s go for a walk.” Generally, Skyler would have preferred the route around the lake, but tonight, the waves of grief were too large and threatened to cripple him if he took their beloved route. Instead, he decided a jaunt through the woods was a better option. It had rained earlier making the air frigid, thick and damp and the trail was sopping wet in parts, which Ogre seemed to enjoy. As he picked up speed, the wind seemed to follow pace. Skyler let the chilled air cut his lungs and whip his cheeks. It felt better focusing on the wind-burnt-throbbing in his face than the aching, pit in his heart. Ogre ran and howled and chased the critters. He loved the speed and felt it was an exciting game. Skyler knew he should shut Ogre’s energy down, but the calamity he was risking also felt invigorating. It felt good to let his anger boil over with a companion whose energy matched his.

Each thud with the earth felt like a big “FUCK YOU” to the universe, so he picked up his pace. He was running so hard at that point, he hadn’t even noticed he had dropped Ogre’s leash. In fact, he hadn’t noticed that he had been running for nearly an hour and a half and it was now pitch black. It was only when he tripped over a large root in the trail sending him sprawling like a rock skipped across the dirt that he noticed any of his surroundings.

“Shit,” he whispered, huffing the air with big gulps and wiping the dirt from him. At first the darkness disoriented him and kept him from noticing the gash he had procured on his fall. As his breathing slowed, his shins quickly let him know that he was in pain. He set his palm on his left shin which was particularly throbbing at full speed, and he winced as he felt a pool of wet blood running down his leg. It was also here in the spot where his ass was handed to him by the universe where Skyler slowly realized Ogre was no longer in his company.

He lunged to his feet hobbling around screaming Ogre’s name. He pulled out his phone whipping his flashlight every which-way hoping to see the goofy dog rooting around for a snack in the woods or aimlessly wandering and sniffing the air. But, it was no luck. His phone eventually ran out of battery life and he plodded home, shins throbbing the whole agonizing journey. His lungs felt like a cold, damp sponge, and as he miserably trudged his way back home, regretting his anger run with every step. He spent nearly an hour of his journey home just cursing loudly and softly and loudly again. He grabbed any sticks or logs he tripped on and hurled them through the woods finding gratification when he heard the echo of a thud. It was after midnight when he saw the street lights come into view.

There were quite a few times he had almost succumb to nature resulting in him lying down on the trail and letting a pack of coyotes or squirrels ravage his body, but as he saw Ogre lying dopily on his back in front of the door, he actually felt tears of relief fill his eyes. He was so overcome with emotions he collapsed next to the dog who dutifully came charging at him as he came into view. Big heaving sobs hoisted themselves out of his aching lungs and his tortured soul. Skyler sobbed on the ground for twenty minutes and only came to terms with reality when a soft, squishy hand gently rubbed his shoulder.

Light humming soothed his ears and quieted the sobs, “My, that’s quite a set of scratches you have on your legs, dear,” Skyler’s red eyes glimpsed down at his shins and in the light he could see the horror that laced his legs. Skyler normally would have felt embarrassed that any of his neighbors had seen him as a sobbing-hot-mess-of-despair, but he found comfort in the fact that Mrs. Delancy—his widowed neighbor of eighty-three—was outside helping him to his front door. She reminded him of his own grandmother who passed when he was just a boy. The same snow-white hair sat tousled on her head and she smelled like baked goods at every moment of the day. He was always helping her with handy-man tasks around her house, and Sharon always helped her pick out presents for children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren at every birthday and holiday. The couple was very close with their neighbor, especially since they had bought their house from her. They went from renting the apartment above her garage to buying the house next to her after her son moved out. She had been of great comfort to them over the past few years of their lives, and she brought a particularly soothing comfort to him now as he knew they both mourned the loss of Sharon gravely.

Mrs. Delancy grabbed Ogre’s leash and led the way to the door. Ogre delightedly pranced next to her with anticipation of a homemade treat that he always got anytime she paid a visit. He sat at the door licking his chops, tail thudding against the house. He was visibly disappointed and confused when he only got a pat on the head.

“You have a package, dear.” She pointed to a small package wrapped in brown paper.

“Yeah, Sharon kept Amazon and every other online retailer in business, that’s for sure,” Skyler nonchalantly chimed, but as he focused his gaze, he noticed there was no address or postage on the package.

“Do you need any help cleaning those scrapes?” Mrs. Delancy inquired with a yawn interrupting her.

“No, Mrs. Delancy. No thank you,” Skyler stuttered grabbing at the package.

“Okay. Well, why don’t you come over tomorrow for dinner. I’ll make you some chicken-fried-steak. I’m dying for a good chicken-fried-steak,” she squealed excitedly.

“Sure, that sounds good. I’ll be there.”

Mrs. Delancy waddled her way back home as Skyler grabbed the small package turning it over, and over, and over through his hands. Who would have dropped this off? What was it? He debated bandaging his legs first, but his curiosity got the best of him. With one quick woosh, he ripped the brown paper from the package to reveal a small box with a lid. Chomping at the bit, he lifted the lid to reveal Sharon’s wedding ring and a small note reading, “She’s not dead.”