One Last Time

We hadn’t been there since...I can’t even remember when. Ten, maybe fifteen years? Too long. I wasn’t even sure if it would still be there to be honest but I had to at least try.

“We’re almost there honey,” I said, turning to my wife.

That old barn was so full of memories but life had caught up to us and we had just forgotten to go back. You know how it is, everything just gets hectic and before you know it time has gone by and you have forgotten to do the things you love the most.

Olivia and I would always walk back together from the bus stop from school and walk past the old barn. Every time we saw it we would notice it and make up stories about what happened there, who built it, who made love there for the first time, or even perhaps it was a secret dungeon that led to another dimension. All kinds of stories that would make us laugh or make us walk faster away from it because we would scare ourselves.

One time though, we got out of the bus and it started raining a few minutes into the walk. The only building that was nearby was the old barn. We just locked eyes, nodded at each other in encouragement, I grabbed her by the hand, and we started running towards the barn to stay as dry as possible. As we entered it we were completely drenched but laughing our butts off.

We looked around the barn for anything to keep us warm but it was mostly empty, except for a few old hay stacks that could serve as cushion as we waited for the rain to pass. Olivia sat down first and then I sat next to her, she came up closer to me and grabbed my arm to warm herself up. At first she leaned her head on my left shoulder but then she looked up at me, our eyes locked, and my heartbeat increased. If I had been wearing an Apple watch it probably would’ve asked me if I was working out.

Somewhere, somehow, I found the courage to learn forward and kiss her. The kiss must have lasted a good five seconds but it felt like time stood still. The rain was no longer banging against the roof of the barn, the wind had quieted down, there was nothing else but her lips against mine, the warmth of her touch, as she literally took my breath away.

“I was wondering when you would do that,” Olivia said with a sly smile. And we kept kissing.

Since then we visited the barn almost every year after that, we even had our wedding there and other anniversary celebrations. But we hadn’t visited it since the kids got a little older and they wanted to do more fun things than just visit an old barn.

“We are here,” I said as I spotted the barn. It was somehow still standing throughout all these years. It was a bittersweet moment seeing it again, but mostly a relief that it was still there.

I got out of the car and walked towards the front door. I looked up and around, to take it all in. I let out a deep breath and went into the barn. This time even the hay stacks were gone, there was nothing left inside the barn. I walked to the middle where we had first kissed, kneeled over and opened the glass jar I was carrying with and spread my wife’s ashes all around, just as she had asked.

“Rest in peace my love. See you on the other side”.