One Hell of a Night

The mysterious package wrapped in brown paper arrived at our quaint little bistro. My brother and I had started it in our early twenties. That was six years ago, it is now one of the hottest restaurants in Portland.

We opened the parcel fifteen minutes ago and still had not said a word to each other. Standing there in silence, staring at it. Finally, through a fog I heard my brother's question.

“What the Hell did you do?”

That was a fair question. What did I do?

Simple answer, a lady in black.

Stay with me, I will get to that part.

For a proper answer, I must take you back to where it all began.

Eight months ago, my brother, John, and I were invited to attend a Charity Art Auction. There was an open bar and after one-to-many beverages, we got caught up in the hype and excitement. We began bidding on a bizarre painting, to this day I still don’t know what it is. We caused a bidding war. Numbers were flying from the auctioneer's mouth, people waving furiously. At one point I believe John and I were competing against each other for the same painting.

In short, we won the painting and became known as the eccentric brothers who paid way too much for a piece of art. Or were we geniuses? Because one month later the artist died, and his last piece of work, our painting, became a priceless item.

Later, we were invited to partake in a prestigious charity event held at the Frye Art Museum in Seattle. In all honesty neither of us wanted to go. We flipped a coin, I lost. It wouldn’t be all bad, rumor had it that Bill and Melinda Gates might make an appearance. Plus, it had an open bar.

So, there I was, standing alone in a rented tuxedo. On my third glass of wine, surveying a room full of people I didn't know. Although I must admit, I look good in a tux.

Watching for Bill and Melinda. Where were they?

Then I saw her, my dream woman come to life. She was talking to a few older men, laughing, playfully touching their arms. She had them captivated. I grabbed a glass of wine from a waitress's tray as she passed by and proceeded to casually approach this beauty. Suddenly, a noise of smashing glass echoed throughout the large room, a tinny sound of a tray ringing off the marble floor. I may have unbalanced the waitress's tray, oops. Mental note, never do that again.

The room became still and quiet as everyone looked at the poor girl. I approached to help her clean the mess, after all I did feel partly responsible. The look she gave me said, back away.

Turning around, she was there in front of me. My God she was beautiful, exotic almond shaped eyes, dark wavy hair cascading over her shoulders, skin like golden honey poured into a black dress, accentuating her beauty.

Moving her focus from the poor waitress to me, she smiled and said in a sultry voice that sent shivers through me.

“Smooth move, what do you do for an encore?”

“Yeah, not my finest moment.” I mumbled.

I know a ‘Meet Cute’ when I see it and this had to be one, right? I thrust the glass out towards her. “I brought you a wine.” Smiled and gave her my best boyish look.

Desperately needing to regain my composure and some dignity. I thought to impress her with my knowledge of wine. After all, I had taken three on-line Sommelier courses. Wine was becoming our number one selling beverage in our restaurant. Frankly, I knew extraordinarily little on the subject, hence the classes.

She accepted the glass and gracefully took a sip. I proceeded to explain to her how to tilt the glass, side view, swirl it gently, breath in the full aroma. Try to guess what the scents are, floral, fruity, earthy?

I could see she was captivated by the way she stared at me.

'Course was paying off.'

“See how the lines of wine run down the glass in rivulets, those are called legs.” I continued “Now take a sip, and swirl it around gently in your mouth, note the dark rich robust texture and taste, this is how you know it is a Shiraz, or Syrah if you will.”

I was on a roll. Gently she reached out, seductively placing a finger on my lips and whispered. “Shhh, stop talking, you're embarrassing yourself. This wine is lighter, delicate and slightly fruitier, it’s a Pinot Noir.”

Embarrassed, I tipped the entire contents of the glass in my mouth, swallowed it in one gulp. “Ahh, yes of Course.” I replied, “This is a Pinot, and I am an Idiot.”

I turned around to walk away, when she took hold of my arm. Smiling up at me she asked. “So, are you here alone, or someone's guest?”

“Nope, I am alone and not really sure why I'm here. I assume they want me to spend money on something I don’t want.” I stated, “And what brings you here, guest or were you invited?”

She looked around, making sure no one was in ear shot, and said with a straight face “I snuck in.”

“How?” I stammered “They have security everywhere, you can’t just sneak in.”

“And yet I did. You were invited, but you don’t belong here anymore than I do.”

I couldn't argue with that. I began to introduce myself when she stopped me.

“No names tonight, okay?”

Taking my hand, she led me to a bar, ordered two Macallan whiskeys. I sipped on mine, she raised an eyebrow questioningly, and drank it all back in one gulp.

I followed suit, then proceeded to choke, gasping for air. “Smooth.” I coughed out.

She laughed, then came close and softly said “Shall we be naughty and have some fun tonight?”

A bead of sweat trickled down me, I would rather not say where. “Uh, huh” I nodded.

Ordering two more glasses, she took me by the hand and led me to a group of people who were evidently in charge of the event. Planting herself in the middle of the group she pointed a finger at a tall gentleman. Poking him in the chest she began to speak some foreign language I didn’t understand, and clearly neither did they. Gesturing and fuming, obviously upset with something, she stopped abruptly, and motioned to me.

I stood open mouth, deer, headlights, me. Until she struck my chest with the back of her hand, staring at me.

Turning to the stunned group I ad-libbed “Princess Kara, says she cannot eat this food. She was promised delicacies of her homeland. Where is the pig snout roast?”

“Pig snout roast?"

“Yes man.” I continued “And the Camel kebobs?"

Blank stares.

"Lemon locust bites?" I inquired.

Looking uncomfortable, the tall man clearly trying to be civil, stuttered “I am truly sorry, but I cannot say.”

Turning to her I spoke as best I could in her made-up language. Gesturing and pointing at the tall man. She lost it, again ranting on in this foreign tongue, finishing off with a stamp of her foot.

I backed away feigning fear, turned to the group saying, “Quickly you fool, go find out where the food is before she really gets upset.” Off they went, stumbling into each other, rushing to get away from this crazy lady.

We stayed in character, mingling with other groups, making more outlandish statements. Leaving the people with puzzled and dazed expressions. Later, we found ourselves in a quiet little room away from the crowd.

“You were brilliant.” she laughed.

My heart was beating so hard I thought for sure I would collapse. “That was awesome.” I cried out.

“Shall we continue.” she asked.

I only had one response “Hell yeah. But first, we need another drink.”

We ran into the poor unfortunate waitress, who’s tray had 'accidently' fallen earlier. I apologized for the mishap and gave her a hundred dollars as compensation. With a caveat that the two of us were never to be without a drink tonight. Smiling she Handed us the full tray, promising we would not go dry.

“What next?” I asked.

With a devilish smile and an innocent twinkle in her eye she replied, “Let’s go to the various auctions and push the prices up.”

And away we went, extravagantly upping the last bid, then running off. The crowds began to recognize who I was, apparently my reputation had proceeded me, I was that eccentric guy. They assumed I knew something about art. I did not.

Bidding was out of control, people stuck to us like nuts on a candy bar. Sometimes we would raise the bid, other times we scoffed. There we were, drinking and bidding on items we didn’t want. A main event item was by Aries the Artist. They were five mysterious paintings wrapped in brown paper. Purchase sight unseen. How very avant-garde. We played those hard, whispering amongst ourselves. Potential buyers paying plenty to out bid us.

I was intoxicated with the excitement. The liquor added it's own little touch.

Did we have fun, yes. Did we go too far, possibly? Especially when she convinced me to swap outfits with her. Should we have kept our own clothes on? Absolutely. But damn if she didn’t look stunning in my tux, and frankly I rocked that black Louis Vuitton dress.

It was glorious.

It was stupid.

It was one hell of a night.

It was also the moment I bumped into Bill and Melinda. He nodded in such a way it made me feel important. Then shrugged his shoulders as if to say, 'I've seen worse'. Melinda smiled at me, "Beautiful dress, it accentuates your shoulders."

Man, they are classy people. I'd stake my reputation, what little I have, that they stay together.

It was only a matter of time before one of the event coordinators caught on, I think it was the tall man. Security guards politely escorted us to a quiet room. Where they kindly let us change back into our own outfits. I made sure everyone turned around while she got dressed. Smiling while holding the exit door open for us, they bid us good night.

There we were in an alley at night, just us, the garbage cans and a few scurrying rats. The back door creaked opened. Silhouetted in the doorway was our server with a bottle of red Black Rook, and two glasses. I retrieved this nectar of the Gods, thanked our waitress, and gave her another hundred dollars. She gently closed the door, and we were finally alone.

Finding two empty milk crates to sit on, we drank in silence. I was captivated by this woman.

“Thank you for making them turn around. You didn’t peek when I was changing, did you?”

I shook my head.

“You really are a gentleman.” she said.

Smiling, I looked at her and said, “Have I also mentioned, I’m an Idiot?”

She laughed; I loved that sound; true, pure, honest.

Setting her glass down, she stood up, I joined her. Placing both her hands on my chest, staring into my eyes she stood on her tip toes. Leaned up and gave me the best most memorable kiss I ever had... on my cheek.

She then turned and walked out of my life.

Next day, the news was all about the charity, raising the most money in the events history.

Which brings us back to now. Staring at an abstract painting, from the package.

“How much did you pay?” asked John.

“I don’t remember purchasing it.” I shrugged my shoulders. “Apparently, Aries the artist paints a nude portrait of herself then lays naked on the canvas while it’s still wet.”

He gave me a dirty look.

I pushed on, "I also met Bill and Melin..."

“Oh, shut up” John yelled. Looking at the paper in my hand he asked, “Is that the bill?”

With trepidation I opened the envelope that accompanied the package. It was a letter not a receipt. Relieved I read the one handwritten line.

My Gift to you for one hell of a night.

Aries

Hmmm, that was thoughtful of her.

One month later my lady in black was featured on the cover of a magazine.

Aries - Mystery paintings worth up to one million dollars.

I did it again.

I would like to thank you for taking the time to read my story. If you enjoyed it, please leave a heart, and help yourself to view my other writings. Should you decided to leave a tip, it is not expected, but always appreciated.

Jason,

Other Stories :

-Cost of Freedom - Little Shadow - Cocaine and Chocolate cake

- Coffee, Cake and Conversation ( A short story -greeting the end of the world)

-Truth or Consequence - Bullying Of Anne Madeine

- Best Date I Never Had - Two Steps - Falling

-Oh, What a Lucky Man - The Final Battle-