Nathalie

Jenn: "You told me you weren't going to leave!"

Nat: "How did you find me?"

Jenn: "Let me take you home!"

Nat: "I already called an UBER."

Jenn: "Cancel it. I'm taking you home."

Nat: "No! I want you to stay here with your friends."

Jenn: "No, "I’m not going to repeat myself again."

Nat: "Why do you feel like you need to be the one to take me home?"

Jenn: "Because I want to. Let's go."

Nat: "You know I’m going to walk to your car and get myself an UBER, right?"

Jenn: "No… you're not."

Nat: "How do you know where you're going?"

Jenn: "I know this area because I'm here all the time. You’re not.

Here, let me open your door.”

Nat: "Do you need help putting it in?"

Jenn: "That's what she said."

Nat: "You know I meant your phone charger, but why do I always say things like that?

Oh, and don't worry about that text, it’s just me responding to the group, letting them know that we already left."

Jenn: "I already knew that was you texting… You have a separate text tone."

Nat: "Why do I have a separate text tone?"

Jenn: “I honestly don’t really want to tell you…”

Nat: “Well… we have a 30-minute drive ahead of us. Meaning you have plenty of time to tell me why I have a different ring tone from the rest of our friends.”

Jenn: “Listen Nat, I don’t love that you’ve started talking to this new girl of yours. She sounds less than responsible, and you’re like the most responsible person I know.”

Nat: “Yeah, I know she’s not exactly what I’m looking for.”

Jenn: “Exactly! In fact, she’s far from it. You’ve already said you like dark hair, brown eyed, athletic girls. Plus, you want someone who is smart, funny, and has a lot of depth. You know, someone you can have really interesting conversations with and talk to about aliens, the universe, even politics. You need someone you can have enlightening conversations with about something as mundane as the weather.”

Nat: “Yes, I know that’s what I’m normally attracted to, but look at where that’s gotten me… besides what does any of this have to do with me having a separate ring tone from the rest of our group?”

Jenn: “Nat, you’re not getting the point.”

Nat: “No…? I guess I’m not. What are you trying to say, Jenn?”

Jenn: "Nat, you know that I'm not a religious person but if I had to pick which of the seven deadly sins I struggle with most, it would be jealousy. I wish I wasn’t but I’m a jealous person. And I've had a really hard time with you meeting someone that you've shown an interest in.”

Nat: “I still don’t understand…”

Jenn: “Nat, you're the epitome of what I am looking for in someone. Getting to know you over the past 2 years has made me analyze EVERYTHING about myself and why you weren’t and still aren’t attracted to me. I’ve tried to emulate you in every way possible, to try to be the best person I could be in a relationship."

Nat: "Jenn, I don't know what to say... I had no idea. But I am completely flattered…"

Jenn: "I have really strong feelings for you…And I know you don't have reciprocating feelings for me.

From the day I met you I felt like our souls knew one another. Like we’d known each other from lifetimes ago. Like I’d been waiting my whole life to meet you. That's why I disappeared last weekend. I was deciding if I could keep doing this or if I needed to distance myself and maybe stop hanging out with you..."

Jenn: “Nat… Are you crying?"

Nat: "Yes."

Jenn: "Why are you crying?! I should be the one crying. Telling you all of this will potentially change everything between us."

Nat: "I'm crying because I don't want to lose you... Jenn, I see you every weekend.

You've become an integral part of my life. I don't want to lose the friendship we have."

Jenn: “You understand I don’t want to lose you either, right? Like more than anything I don’t want to lose you.”

Nat: "Why me though, Jenn?"

Jenn: "Why you Nat…? I asked myself this every single fucking day. Why would I fall for someone who doesn’t feel the same way back?

I wonder if I signed a soul contract with you before this lifetime…That I’m repaying some type of karmic debt from lifetimes ago…

Or perhaps it’s simpler than that.

I, and everyone else, think you’re so magnetic and charismatic.

The way you are so upfront and honest… So authentically you.

Everyone I know is in love with you. It’s not just me.

But more than anything, I wish I didn’t feel this way…”

Nat: "Here, wait, park in my driveway, I need a few moments with you in the car before you leave.

Take my hand, promise me this isn't going to change our friendship?"

Jenn: "I promise Nat. Just promise me you aren't going to treat me differently after this."

Nat: “I won't…Everything's going to be fine. Okay?

Everything's going to be fine.”

Jenn: “Promise?”

Nat: “I want you to text me tonight when you get home.

And I'm going to text you tomorrow, Okay?

Here, let me get out of the car to give you a hug,

Everything's going to be fine, everything's going to be just fine.”

Jenn: “Nat… I know you're listening, whether you answer your phone or not... And even though it’s been 6 months and 14 days since we last spoke, I still miss you, more than anything.

Your memory lingers incessantly. I can still hear the sound of your sultry voice. I imagine your perfect posture, the way your perfume smelled and your intense stare, as though your ocean blue eyes were looking right into my soul…

Today, I felt like I had started to forget you, that I was starting to look forward to things in life again.

In fact, I wasn’t really thinking about anything as I cut into a red, juicy apple and began to twist off the stem.

With each turn, I began to recite the letters of the alphabet in my head.

You know, the way we did in elementary school. When the final thread of the stem gives out, peeling away from the apple, whatever letter we’d land on was who we would marry, or had a crush on, or were in love with.

I would’ve been a sight for you to see as I spun the stem over and over again…

A…B…C…

I wondered if the stem would break free on the letter of the woman I was currently seeing…

She knows all about you by the way…

H…I…J…

It didn’t.

The stem was attached well.

It would not dawn on me what would happen… I felt like I had started to forget you.

L…M…N…

It snapped.

The whole thing came off in my hand.

And all I could do was stare down at that damn stem…"

Nat: "Hello...Jenn?"

Jenn: "Nathalie...”