Most Secret Secret

The old garden shed, nestled under an ancient oak in the far corner of the backyard, held more than its share of secrets. The secrets of Nature. The secrets of childhood.

And, waiting for me to discover it, the best, Most Secret, Secret of all.

I was a timid, shy child, the youngest of seven. I was small for my age, and people routinely gave me cutesy, small-child nicknames like Peewee and Peanut, Cookie and Sweetie Pie. I was a sickly child, and to make matters worse, I stuttered; so I avoided talking whenever possible.

The shed was my refuge, my hidey-hole. A place where I could go to disappear from a world that was too big, too mean, too scary, too crowded. I could slip into its warm darkness, hunker down behind an old crate, or hide beneath the ancient row-boat that leaned tiredly against the back wall. If I stayed quiet as a mouse - actually, quieter than a mouse; mice are surprisingly noisy creatures - anyone looking for me would peer in the door, shrug their shoulders, and walk away, never discovering my hiding place.

Many creatures called the shed home. There was the mouse family that lived in the chewed-up fluff of a discarded blanket. Generations of mice, squeaking and rustling and staring at me with black-bead eyes from the dark corners. There were a few snakes that passed through: yellow-striped garter snakes, black rat snakes, and once a pretty little ring-neck snake. There was a family of phoebes who built their nest there every year. They would slip in through the broken window and settle happily into their warm, dry, safe corner, raising a new family of cheeping babies every year.

But then, one day, when I slipped quiet as a snake into my secret place, someone else was there. A shadow moved in the far corner, a shadow too big to be any of my nature-friends. A boy-shaped shadow.

“Who are you?” I asked sharply. “And what are you doing here? This is MY place!”

The boy turned, startled, his back to the darkest corner of my shed, his hands upraised as if to protect himself. Heavens, I thought, he’s afraid of ME! How could that be? No one had ever been afraid of ME.

“Who are you?” I asked, more gently. I pushed the door a little wider, to let more light into the shed, so I could examine this apparition. He was a brown boy: brown hair, brown eyes as far as I could see, brown clothes, brown bare feet. He looked half-starved. And terrified. How strange!

“I’m not going to hurt you,” I told him softly. I reached slowly into my sweatshirt pocket and drew out a Snickers candy bar. “Are you hungry?” I asked him, offering the chocolate treat. He licked his lips and swallowed, but said nothing. I gently tossed the candy bar in his direction. He caught it with a quick, bird-like snatch. He held it up to his nose, never taking his eyes off of me. Then, in a lightning motion, he unwrapped it and wolfed it down in two bites.

“Look,” I said, taking a step toward him, “I’m -”

He snapped his fingers and disappeared. Disappeared! I stood there, mouth hanging open in amazement.

I grabbed the flashlight I kept by the door and flicked it on. Its brilliant beam cut through the shed, lighting it up like a searchlight. The mice scurried, the birds squawked and dashed out the window. The corner was empty. The boy was gone. Well! I plopped down with a little thump, landing on an old chair cushion. What the - ?

My mind raced with impossible possibilities. Was he a fairy? An elf? An alien? A ghost? (Not that a ghost would eat a Snickers bar….)

Determined to figure this out, I spent every waking moment in the shed. Finally exhausted, I fell asleep. Drifting in a dream, I felt a gentle touch on my shoulder. Slowly opening my eyes, I gazed into the brown eyes of the brown boy. He gently took my hand. Then he snapped his fingers.

And we were transported to another world! The sky was green, the clouds were pink, and the grass was a brilliant, glowing yellow. Purple water ran merrily downstream to leap over a sparkling waterfall. Silver birds soared through the air, and golden unicorns pranced in the fields.

It was the most beautiful place I had ever seen. The boy beside me smiled, then delicately reached out one hand to touch my brow. Instantly, our minds connected, communicating in blasts of colors and smells and sunbursts of thought.

“Welcome to the Feyland,” his mind said to mine.

“It will be our Most Secret Secret,” I promised wonderingly.