Longing Call

I’ve always been in love with my close friend Sarah. Ever since we were friends in high school, I’ve felt this way. Her gentle smile, her delightful laugh, just everything about her. I knew I was in love with her – I always looked forward to attending school, I always hoped that the notifications on my phone were from her, and I admittedly got jealous when other guys made moves on her or got too comfortable around her. But I knew that for her, friends were all we were. No more feelings were attached, and quite frankly, I was okay with that as well. We spent a lot of time together – we were the iconic duo at school, and people knew as such. We finished each other’s sentences, went wherever the other went, and we knew what the other was thinking without saying a single word. And this was how it was – just the closest of friends, struggling through high school and life.

When college hit, I was fully prepared to drift apart from her. At this point, I had accepted the fact that, while we would probably stay in contact, we would be going down different paths in life. She was interested in engineering, and I was interested in life sciences, so I knew that even in our careers we probably would never interact. She went to a college with top rankings for mechanical engineering, on a full scholarship due to her stellar performance in high school, while I went to in state university, pursuing what I wanted in the field of research. And time passed. I let her go, reaching out from time to time to see how she was doing. And that was the end of my romance. I wish it could have been more, but at the same time, I loved Sarah enough to respect that she didn’t. We found new people to fill in each other’s gaps and strived to become better and reach the goals which we had set for ourselves.

But almost as if I were living in a romantic fiction, one day I received an email through my university. I was a graduate student now, and I was studying biotechnology. This email detailed the specifics of my upcoming lab work, in which my university would be pairing with another two universities to work on our current research – medical applications of technological innovations. Our university was focused on the biotechnological aspect of the systems. A smaller in state university would be focused on the political aspects of these technologies, working to pass our technology through the ethical board and other parts of the justice system. And finally, the out of state university – its name caught my eye. Although it was a small university, its name was very recognizable. This university was the same one that Sarah had decided to go to, but just to make sure of it, I sent her a text.

That evening, the text I received from her made me happier than I had been for a while. She confirmed my speculations and told me that her flight here would probably be in a week, and that she had not wanted to tell me until the plans were finalized. I was elated at this and told her that if she needed a place to stay that my apartment would be available to her. I told her to not worry about any costs, and that I would be able to take care of the essentials, if she were to choose to stay with me. She told me that she would think about it and that she was glad she had this option. I started cleaning that evening, and even went out and got some candles so that I could get rid of some of the “manly” stench that I was sure my apartment had.

Several days passed, and I was starting to get worried because Sarah had not sent me any new updates – there was no word from her since our last conversation, and I was afraid that I had possibly made things awkward. Every time my phone buzzed with a notification, I hoped that it was her, letting me know that she had decided to stay with me. But every time I was disappointed to see a social media or email notification. Another couple of days passed – it was the day that Sarah had told me she would be flying in. I contemplated sending her a message. My finger hovered over the send button multiple times, but I just couldn’t bring myself to shoot her a quick text. I scrolled back through our messages to see if I had sent her something rude or offensive. I didn’t see anything that might have made her upset with me, but I still couldn’t keep my mind off it. I went to bed early that day, skipping dinner, depressed and angry at myself for not being able to see any reason as to why she might be giving me the cold shoulder.

The piercing sound of my alarm woke me the next day. My blankets were on the floor along with my pillows, and I was laying almost perpendicular to the bed. I guess subconsciously I was very nervous to go to my lab today, since it would mean that I would be seeing Sarah. I hoped she had arrived safely, and that there had not been any big inconveniences in her flight here. I checked my phone to see if I had been sent any updates regarding the lab, or if Sarah had maybe sent me a text last night. Nothing. I got up, dressed, and went through my morning routine. I showered, shaved, ate breakfast, and got dressed in my lab clothes – a white shirt, black jeans, and lab coat thrown on top of it all. By the time I was done, the sun was just climbing over the distant mountains, showing off a clear, orange sky and a warm, soft gaze. Hopefully this was a premonition of a good day.

I arrived at lab early, as usual. I flicked on the lights, and watched as they turned on one after another, illuminating the workplace in a rhythmic manner. First things first, I went and checked on my own station – I dusted the work area, set up the equipment needed to start on our new project, and created 4 stacks of printouts highlighting our new work for my colleagues. Rechecking my phone to make sure I correctly set up the office for the legal team, I went back and forth from the printer room to the lab office and brought all the documents that the group would be reviewing. And lastly, I set up the engineers’ station. I wasn’t sure what most of the mentioned equipment were, so I set up only what I could figure out. When I was done with everything, I sat down, put my headphones on, and started reading my handouts with some light music playing in the background.

When I looked up from my reading, the laboratory was full. Everyone was at their respective stations and working hard. A couple of my peers were pacing, some were discussing, and others were reading like me. I scanned the room, trying to find Sarah without making it too obvious. As if on cue, she looked up from her work as soon as I saw her. Our eyes locked, and I gave her a faint smile, which she returned. I quickly looked down, embarrassed, hoping that she couldn’t hear my heart thumping. Refocusing on my work, I quickly got lost in the pages and the time began to fly once again. The next time I looked up, the laboratory was empty once again, aside from a few other stragglers like me cleaning up their stations and tidying up their work for the day. The entire engineering group, along with Sarah, was all gone, and I just assumed that they had left for dinner as a group. As the remaining three of the legal team got up to leave, my only other remaining lab mate stood up. He stacked his papers neatly, gave me a quick tap on the shoulder, and waved as he headed towards the exit. Now it was just me, once again. I supposed it was time to call it a night, maybe go out and get myself a soju before heading back home to chill. And this was how it was for the next month or so. A constant grind to try and develop a new medical application.

The final week went splendidly. Everyone did an outstanding job on their portion, and we were able to come up with a prototype and get it approved by the ethics committee as well as the medical board. I was super proud of the work that we had achieved, and upon talking with my principal investigator, I got permission from the university to take the entire group – which amounted to about 40 people – to go out and get some good food. Not everyone went, but a good thirty of us agreed to go eat at a nearby Korean barbeque restaurant. I arrived a solid fifteen minutes early so that I could try and reserve spots for everyone. Lucky for us, there were exactly thirty seats available – three tables of ten seats. I sent the restaurant information to everyone else in our joint group chat and waited patiently for them to arrive, occasionally taking a glance at the chat to see if there were any updates. Sarah’s group was the last to arrive, and as she entered, she gave me a quick glance and smiled. I smiled back and continued looking at the menu.

We all ate a full dinner, and a lot of us drank alcohol as well. We were just about wrapping things up, when Sarah hobbled over to me and leaned in. The smell of soju was strong on her, and her balance was off. I grabbed her forearm firmly and helped her stand. She began to slur her words at me.

“Hey, areyou heading homenow?” she questioned.

“I think all of us are,” I replied.

“Mmm… What doesyour apartment looklike?” she sighed, breathing a gust of sweet-smelling soju, as she leaned in further.

“I guess you’ve never seen it before, huh?” I chuckled, with an awkward grin on my face. I wasn’t sure how to respond to her, especially since she had been such a stranger towards me all throughout our time working on this new product. If something good could come out of this, I didn’t want to mess this up, but at the same time she was so clearly intoxicated, I thought I would be stepping out of line if I got too chummy with her in her current state.

“Well, Ikindof wantto see it,” she whined. Sarah was very close to me now, and I could feel the heat of her body as she pushed into me. No one else seemed to be paying attention to us, and several of the other carpoolers had started to leave already.

“Didn’t you come with someone else?” I looked around to look for the people that had come with her, but at this point almost everyone had left. I looked back at Sarah, who had wide pupils and looked like a begging puppy.

“I toldthem you couldtake me,” she giggled mischievously. She sat in the empty seat next to mine and propped herself up with her elbows on my knees. “Areyou gettingnervous?” she giggled again.

“I mean… it seems like you had no intention of giving me a choice of whether to take you or not from the get-go. Where are you guys staying? I can drive you back, I didn’t drink any alcohol tonight,” I looked down at her, and was met with a pair of brown, playful eyes. I couldn’t help but notice her as a woman. My eyes were drawn to her figure, clearly more defined now from her working out. Her bare arms, with faint lines of muscle, the way her top gently caressed her shoulders and chest, the lingering smell of perfume applied at the start of the day. Even my involuntary bodily response indicated how attractive she was – my pupils dilated, my heart beat even faster, and blood was rushing where any decent man would not want for it to.

After what felt like an eternity, I broke my eye contact and looked anywhere but down, hoping she wouldn’t notice my uncontrolled masculine response. There was an awkward silence, and I could hear the ticking of a clock on the wall. She seemed to get heavier, and when I glanced down at her again, I found her fast asleep, almost losing balance. Catching her, I sighed. I wasn’t sure what a guy was supposed to do in a situation like this. After a bit of thinking and a couple of dirty looks from the restaurant owner, I decided to just bring Sarah to my place. I situated her securely on my back and hurriedly left the restaurant – all the while afraid that people would get the wrong idea. I sat down in my car and sighed in relief after getting her into my passenger seat.

The drive back home felt longer than usual. I took the turns carefully, ensuring that the bumpy road passed as smooth as possible. Thankfully, I lived on the first floor, so when I arrived at the parking garage, it was relatively easy to scoop Sarah up in my arms and carry her to my apartment. After fumbling with my keys and struggling to keep Sarah balanced in my arms, I finally got through the door and stumbled to my bedroom, laying her on her side in my bed and covering her with a blanket. I took a step back and took a second to fully register everything that had happened tonight. Grabbing a glass of water, I sat down on the sofa, suddenly extremely mentally exhausted as all of today’s events came crashing down on me.

I awoke to something extremely heavy. It frightened me, and my body reacted as such – my eyes quickly adjusted to the dark, and I looked down to see Sarah draped over me. Perhaps due to my sudden awakening, I was extremely confused, and started to get up, pushing Sarah to the side but making sure she didn’t fall off the sofa. She let out a whimper and leaned herself into me.

“Hey, what are you doing out here? I literally gave you my entire bed to sleep in,” I whispered to her.

“Mmm…” she responded, pushing her face into my side and shaking it back and forth.

“I – do you need me to bring you back?” I stuttered, flustered and bewildered at what was happening.

“Only if you join me,” she said sheepishly, face still buried. Lifting her head and looking at me, beady pupils visible in the moonlight, she playfully bit down on my stomach.

“I – okay I’ll stay with you if you promise to behave,” I started to get up, but she pushed me back down.

Sarah had a mischievous grin on now. “Carry me,” she said, and proceeded to put her entire weight onto me. In this moment, a suppressed emotion – my love for her – flared, and I was suddenly so conscious about everything that was happening. I carefully put my arms under her torso and legs and lifted her. Sarah let out a squeal as I lifted her and myself off the sofa and shuffled towards the bedroom. My heart was thumping so hard that I was sure my neighbors could hear it. As I lay her down, she grabbed onto my forearms.

“It’s kind of warm in your room, can I take a layer off?” she asked, and before I could even respond she was taking her shirt off. Her body, illuminated in the moonlight, was incredibly beautiful. And in this moment, I knew that I wanted her again, like all those years in the past.

“Fuck it,” I uttered, before grabbing both of her wrists in one hand and undoing my belt with the other. I pinned her to the bed, arms over her head, ignoring her playful squirming. Sarah was squealing again, and it was making me more excited. There was no point in hiding my erection either, and after taking off everything below the waist, I started to undress Sarah, whose arms were still pinned down. I had never realized how bratty she was, and as I tried to take her panties off, she stubbornly kept her legs closed, all the while giggling. I removed my hand from her wrists, and grabbed her legs, gently yanking her towards me and eliciting a moan. I couldn’t be bothered to fully undress her, so I pushed the skimpy strip of fabric aside, and with a swift movement pushed my entire length inside of her. She gasped and moaned, no longer caring about how much sound she was making, and soon our hips were rocking back and forth in rhythm. It was like a key to a lock – a tight, perfect fit. Time seemed to slow down as we made love to one another, her legs wrapped around my waist, my arms caressing her back, both of our faces mere inches from one another.

“I love you, I always have,” I whispered to her, breaking the stream of moans and grunts.

“And yet you never chased after me,” she whispered back, before pulling me in for a kiss, once again drowning our conversation with moans and grunts. I knew I was in love with her again, and I knew that this time I wouldn’t let her simply leave. But thinking about that was for a later time – I refocused myself on the present moment, making a mental note to have a serious talk with her in the morning when we awoke together.