Like Letters Written on the Sand Part Seven

Anna-leis struggled to make sense of what had occurred during this frustrating period. Sometimes she experienced severe phantom pains, as if the leg she no longer had had trapped her legs in a vice. Throughout all of this, Clarence held Anna-Lei’s hand through the pain, and it broke his heart that he could not ease her suffering. Physical suffering was not as heartbreaking as the pain she felt deep within. Both Clarence and Anna-leis were aware that Anna-leis had not allowed herself to grieve.

When she felt the most vulnerable and weak, she would attempt to push Clarence away on those days. Whenever she needed support, he was there to provide it.

“The truth is that I do not understand why you wish to marry me. I am a broken person.”

Clarence would gently place his fingers on her chin, and she would face him. You are not broken, Anna-leis, you are beautiful. My sincere wish is that you could see it for yourself.

A week and a half later, I woke up in a hospital bed to learn that I had lost both my legs above the knees due to severe damage, and I had succumbed to sepsis.”

You should let yourself grieve, let yourself cry, and let yourself think about what happened, but do not bury it so deeply that you become a biter Anna-leis.”

Although Anna-leis knew he was right, she could not help but stare down at her lap, where her legs should have been. She said nothing to Clarence, but he quietly massaged her shoulders, wanting to ease even a small amount of her pain.

“I wouldn’t blame you if you decided not to marry me.”

“Anna-leis, I still want to marry you, if anything, my love for you has grown.”

“My love for you is as strong as ever.” Anna-leis said gently. “I guess today was just a tough day for me.”

“We all have hard days sweetie, days when it just seems too much, but that is why we have Jesus, that is why we have each other.”

As Anna-leis nodded, she was grateful for Clarence’s presence for the way in which he reminded her of what really mattered. Even when she did not feel that she was lovable, he loved her unconditionally.

There were times when Anna-leis really struggled, and Clarence would come in with a single red rose, or a love letter. The way he reminded her that to him, she was everything, left her wondering what she had done to deserve a love like Clarence’s.

It has not been easy dealing with me, some people think I am cold.”

“Anna-leis, those people are unaware of you, because you are far from cold.”

“Despite my best efforts, I come across as cold.”

“Sweetheart, in order to protect yourself from pain, you have learned to cover yourself in layers.”

“You are showing me how to remove these layers one by one.” She said softly. “But sometimes it still feels like I have so far to go.”

“We are all still works in progress, Anna-leis.” Clarence replied gently. It is for this reason that all of us need God, whether or not we want to admit it.”

Anna-leis smiled; Clarence had a way of making her smile even when times were tough. The way he treated her made her feel as if she were a queen. It was something she had never experienced before meeting Clarence.

“There is no way I will wait until I receive my prosthetics before I get married. As much as they had to take, there is no guarantee that I will be able to master walking in them. The most important thing is that I love you, and you did not want to wait, and now I also do not want to wait. It is not so much about walking down the aisle, but the most important part is that we will be married.”

“I believe what we have is God’s will, he put us together for a reason, we are meant to be joined as one, but I don’t want to press you into an early wedding date.“

”Clarence, you are not pressuring me into anything. I am eager to get married, and I do not wish to wait any longer.“

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The moments when they read God’s word together on the sofa were special to Anna-leis.

Psalm 118:1-10

1 Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good;

his love endures forever.

2 Let Israel say:

“His love endures forever.”

3 Let the house of Aaron say:

“His love endures forever.”

4 Let those who fear the Lord say:

“His love endures forever.”

5 When hard pressed, I cried to the Lord;

he brought me into a spacious place.

6 The Lord is with me; I will not be afraid.

What can mere mortals do to me?

7 The Lord is with me; he is my helper.

I look in triumph on my enemies.

8 It is better to take refuge in the Lord

than to trust in humans.

9 It is better to take refuge in the Lord

than to trust in princes.

10 All the nations surrounded me,

but in the name of the Lord I cut them down.

During the times when she was struggling to move forward, Anna-leis found comfort in spending time with Clarence in God's Word.

To Be Continued…