Life in Disparity

Danni shifted uncomfortably in her seat, wishing, for the umpteenth time, that this course wasn't required for her degree. Or at least, why couldn’t it have been a smaller class?

As always, she was sitting in the last row in a room that could have doubled as a theater. There were easily a hundred people in the class.

Danni eyed the exit and sighed. She still had twenty minutes to go. Mapping her escape only exacerbated her dread of being there.

Why had she agreed to go to this university? Danni would have been happier at a much smaller school. Working at her own pace and taking online courses would have suited her much better.

The problem was all of the people. There were just too many of them. Everyone was always jostling for space. Always needing to make their opinions known. Always making noise.

Who was she kidding? The problem was her. Danni had been shy as a child. That led to her being bullied at school and abused at home.

Even after she had escaped her abysmal home life, Danni couldn't tolerate being around other people. Even the small support group she was forced to attend made her itch.

It was her counselor who insisted that she face her fears and attend an actual university. It wasn't often that someone in her situation had the brains to qualify for a full scholarship. Why not take advantage of it?

Because it was excruciating, that’s why. If being crammed into classrooms wasn’t bad enough, it seemed the majority of the student body acted more like monkeys in their free time.

“There is a belief that we live in a parallel universe.” The instructor's words snapped Danni out of her thoughts. “Several threads, in fact. Some say that every decision we make causes us to diverge into another life.”

What utter nonsense, Danni thought. She rubbed her temples in an attempt to ward off a stress headache.

“So, I would like you to think about the major decisions you have made and how they have changed your life. You have two weeks to write an assessment of what your life could have been had you made a different choice.” Her instructor continued. He flicked his hand toward the door and began packing up his class materials.

Danni didn't hesitate. She flew for the door. She ducked this way and that, narrowly avoiding being touched by the throngs of other students in the hallways.

Once outside, she slipped into a corner and took slow, deliberate breaths to calm her nerves. After the crowd dispersed, Danni continued on her way.

This Psychology course was her last class of the day so she cut through the quad on her way off campus toward the group home she lived in.

“How am I supposed to write this paper?” Danni muttered to herself. “It’s not like I’ve had much choice in anything in my life.”

The “Pillars of Reflection” shimmered in the sun. This was a series of mirrored poles designed by some art student. Danni supposed they were supposed to make you think. She had to admit that they were interesting when they reflected a storm in the distance or snowflakes seemed to swirl within them. Most days, however, they only served to blind people in the quad.

Today, Danni was too preoccupied to pay much attention to them. That is, until she thought she saw a brightly clothed figure out if the corner of her eye walking beside her. Danni stopped and glanced around. There was no one near her. She looked directly at the pillars but only saw her own drab self reflected.

“Weird.” Danni shook her head and continued walking. Once home, she snagged an apple from the kitchen and holed herself up in her room.

Although she had plenty of other homework, the Psych assignment was foremost in her mind. She might as well get a start on it.

After staring at a blank piece of paper for fifteen minutes or more, she began to scrawl out the first sentences. “As I don't share the belief of divergent lives, I choose not to complete this assignment. Somewhere in a parallel universe, maybe I will pass this class.”

Danni read over her words then crumpled the paper into a ball before throwing it away. That sort of attitude didn't usually serve her well. It was a testament to her counselor that she even chanced writing them. Danni sighed and picked up her math book instead.

The fist missed her by a fraction of an inch as she bent backward to avoid it. Dhani grinned and spun into a kick that connected with his chest, sending him crashing into the foam wall.

Dhani didn't wait to see if he would get up. With a running leap, she ricocheted off the walls until she was high enough to reach the rope. Dhani took a calming breath, then flew at the rope, letting it swing her across the chasm.

As she shimmied up the rock wall, she felt fingers scrabbling at her foot. Dhani glanced down to see the third competitor. He might not be as fast, but he was determined.

Dhani adjusted her grip as the man closed in on her. As he pulled up next to her, Dhani swung herself around, knocking him off the wall and into the foam pit below. Could she have made it up the wall before him? Sure. She nearly lost her grip in the maneuver. But the roar from the crowd made up for the embarrassment of nearly losing so close to the end.

Dhani reached the top of the wall and was in the clear. All that was left was to run across the narrow ledge and hit the large red button. The cheers were deafening.

She raised her arms and turned, basking in the glory of her win. Dhani could see herself on the jumbo screen, resplendent in her form-fitting canary yellow and fuchsia uniform.

A few years ago, things had been different. Dhani struggled at school. It wasn't that she was stupid, she just had difficulty concentrating. ADHD left her itching to move.

After a few fights at school, her counselor offered an alternative to getting expelled. His brother was into parkour and ran a martial arts school.

It had taken a bit of argument to convince her parents to allow her to participate. They didn't want to admit that Dhani wasn't perfect.

It was hard, exhausting work, but Dhani loved it. Over time, she found that she could concentrate at school enough to pass her classes. She would never be an honors student, but at least she wasn't failing anymore.

Just before graduation, Dhani saw a casting call for her favorite show, “Total Domination”. In every episode, a group of competitors raced through an obstacle course. Whoever reached the end first would win $10,000. It wasn't as easy as it sounded.

Not only were they competing against each other, they were vying against an elite athlete called a Dominator. It was an anything-goes sort of race, short of death or dismemberment. The easiest way to win was to literally knock your opponents out.

Dhani’s parents couldn't stand the show. They were terrified that she would be badly injured. It didn't matter that the whole course was padded and everyone had to wear body armor. But they didn't stand in her way.

She had run the course with such speed and agility that she soon had only the Dominator to get through. Unlike other competitors, she hadn't wasted her time trying to take anyone out. She only fought back when one came for her. Dhani took advantage of a weak point she had spotted in the mountain of a man before her. Before he knew what hit him, she had hit that button.

The last thing Dhani had expected was to be offered employment as a Dominator. Now she had formed a close friendship with the others, including the hulking Dominator she had bested. The loyal fans treated them like superheroes.

Although she loved being in the spotlight, Dhani valued the quiet time she needed for her brain to reset. When she got home, she took a long, hot bath.

Afterward, she walked through her bedroom, rubbing her hair with a towel. Just before the edge of the cloth obstructed her view from the mirror, Dhani could have sworn she saw the image of a drab-looking girl huddled on the bed.

Dhani spun around, instinctively reaching for something to defend herself with. That happened to be, ironically, a trophy she had won for hand-to-hand combat.

There was no one there. Dhani checked under the bed and in the closet before concluding it had just been a figment of her imagination. She sat on the edge of the bed, massaging her temples. “I think I need more sleep.”

Dhani tried to forget the image, but she kept catching glimpses of the girl out of the corner of her eye in reflective objects. She was beginning to think she was going crazy. It was distracting her enough that she took a bad hit in the ring while practicing at the gym.

She sat on the edge of her bed, caressing the bruise that had bloomed on her abdomen. The girl in the mirror appeared again. This time she didn't vanish quickly. Instead, she gazed steadily at Dhani with a terrible look on her face.

As Dhani moved forward, so did this young woman. It was almost as their movements were mirrors. They both reached out to touch fingers against each other on the glassy surface.

Dhani realized the eyes staring at her were her own. They weren't just the same grey-blue color, but the same eyes. It was her face, but somehow, it appeared broken—not physically but mentally. Dhani couldn't help but feel sorry for her.

Tears began to stream down the girl’s face. Dhani reached up to find her own face dry. At that moment, the image disappeared.

Danni rubbed her temples and let out an exacerbated groan. She was never going to get this Psych paper done. She glanced up and caught her reflection in the mirror. Only, it wasn't her.

She stood in amazement when the image didn't disappear before she could focus on it. Danni walked forward, breathlessly, and reached out to touch the glass.

Tears began to stream down her face as she took in what she was gazing at. The young woman could have been her twin, albeit happier and more confident. Somehow, despite both having greyish blue eyes, hers seemed brighter than Danni’s.

The girl was dressed like she enjoyed life, in her bright teal tank top and artistically ripped jeans. Her bleached-blond pixie cut was tipped with dye in various shades of the rainbow. It was so unlike Danni’s own ash-blond hair and oversized brown sweater.

Danni blinked, and the image was gone. She took a few deep breaths, trying to shake it off, and then she sat back down in front of her computer.

“Initially, I found it nearly impossible to write this paper. I couldn't wrap my head around a parallel universe. It sounds far too much like a comic strip.

I don’t believe that the paths diverge with every choice we make. You see, I wasn’t given a choice in any of the events that have most affected my life. I didn't choose to let my father beat the crap out of me all the time, sometimes nearly to death. I didn't choose to have a mother who looked the other way and didn't protect me.

I didn't choose to spend my life scared or alone because I’m too afraid to let people in. I didn't even choose to attend this university. Rather, I let myself be talked into it because it was easier than fighting it.

I still can’t say that I believe that I live somewhere in a parallel world. But I can say that if I do, I hope the other version of me is happy. I hope that she is everything that I have failed to be.”