Inventing the Hero

The smell of freshly baked chocolate cake lingered from the kitchen and permeated the main dining room of the restaurant. I assuredly knew what I was having for dessert.

My sense of smell has never failed me. They say a dogs' sense of smell is 1000 times more sensitive than humans. I must have been born with dog genes because I could easily smell precious honey as it's being produced high up in a tree by a grist of bees. I could smell the sweet tart cherry flavor of Dr, Mcgillicuddy's cough syrup that my mum gave my younger sis even though they were on the second floor of the house, and I was downstairs on the front porch. I could frequently smell the mild scent of amber soap as I walked a half mile home from an afternoon of studying at the library. It came from the daily wash that was hung out to dry in my back yard. My sense of smell was keen, much stronger than the other 4 and I loved the smell of desserts.

My grandmama would make German chocolate cake every year for our Christmas gathering. The very sight of the dessert would trigger happiness. Her cakes were perfection. They were always three stacks tall with coconut pecan frosting dividing the perfectly round and flat layers of fluffy chocolate cake. She would then ice the entire thing with the same delectable concoction. My grandmama would finish it with a Criss cross of rich chocolate ganache piped over the top and a half of a whole pecan toward the rim of the cake. She would put one every inch as you go around, so when you slice it, every piece would be garnished with the heavenly treat. Sadly, she passed away in 1905 at the age of 64 of a liver ailment. When she died, so did her recipes. My aunts, uncles and cousins have all tried to reproduce the magic she performed in the kitchen to no avail. Although they made some pretty tasty versions, none of the cakes came close to the prize-winning torte of my dreams.

After an early luncheon with family at the Watercress diner in Southampton, I prepared to say my goodbyes to them. I was on my way to the ship dock where I planned to board the Titanic, a brand-new luxury ocean liner. I saw pictures of it in Ottoman's daily news a few weeks before and couldn't believe how massive it was. How can something so big float by itself? I was beyond amazed.

My destination was New York, New York in The United States of America. The land of the free and the Home of the Brave. This phrase is the country's motto, I know for sure it's used in their national anthem. Whenever there was spare time I would read about American History, hoping to learn things about the place I wanted to venture to. Just like other countries, America had a rocky past. But now it's future looks bright and I wanted to be a part of it. It certainly sounded like a great place to start a life of my own.

At just 20 yrs old, I was a young man in his prime. My aspirations for wanting to go to America started years before when I was just a wee little bloke. On my tenth birthday I received a cuckoo clock in the mail from my uncle Charles. I was completely enthralled with the unique contraption. So many moving parts, so much intricacy in the design. It was intriguing, I needed to know how it worked right away. Over the course of 3 days, I painstakingly took it apart then put it back together again. This was all the inspiration my little inquisitive mind needed. From there on I knew my life's journey would be all about inventing new things.

My latest work was a board game. The idea came to me when I attended a creative confidence workshop in Bradford five years earlier in 1907. My father, Sebastain Clarke, encouraged me to go. He was a hardworking man who held the same job most of his life, bless his heart. In 1899 he inherited his father's printing press business that specialized in paperback book production, but they also take on odd printing jobs for the locals. My Pa felt the workshop would help sharpen my inner talent and desire to invent. He was quite correct in that assumption. The moment I walked in I was captivated by the array work stations throughout the hall. My list of questions began to multiply by the dozens. I was blatantly excited, like a big child waiting for presents on his birthday. I'm sure the other attendees could tell that I was new to this. They all seem to be calmly browsing and chatting with the instructors while I was speed walking and talking to myself out loud. Then I came upon the Parker Brothers display. They were American Inventers who crafted card and board games to sell. I thought to myself, "How fun of a job that would be...I bet I can make a game that people would enjoy." I stayed at least twenty minutes at their display before moving on to other ones.

On that day, I spent a good chunk of time talking to one of the instructors, Mr. Pilkerton. He was a very lively chap that made light of everything. He told me something I will never forget. He said that Life is short, and we will all die one day. It's what we leave behind that will live forever. This statement was very humbling and rang true. It made me realize that I shouldn't waste so much time in a day. I often wondered why I left the hall that afternoon without getting Mr. Pilkerton's address. He was the type of man you want in your life.

I had a fabulous time going to workshops and gained some great knowledge from them as well. I once entered a practical concept contest when I was 17 and came in 2nd place. I designed and built a hamster's cage equipped with a drinking and feeding area. One of the judges said that it was suitable enough for the market. It made me smile from ear to ear.

"In second place for his rodent cage...Addison Clarke...Congratulations young man. Very fine work indeed."

I was quite elated to hear my named called as one of the winners. I turned beet red from the applause I received as I walked up to collect my certificate and 2nd place ribbon from the instructor. The recognition also came with 20 pounds, which I used to begin creating my board game. With my dad's help I was able to complete a prototype just in time. All I needed to do was get it to America and hopefully sell it into mass production with the help of the Parker Brothers.

I reached the port at 11:20 am, it was kind of late seeing that the ship was setting sail at noon. There were 6 lines with at least 30 people left in each of them. There were a hundred or more people hoping to get a stray ticket to buy. One by one I waited until finally it was my turn to be validated. They asked me a litany of questions including if I suffered from seasickness and If I have or ever had tuberculosis. What an intrusion of privacy I thought, but it must be routine for this kind of travel. After the questions were over, I was allowed to board the ship. I turned around one last time to see if I could see my mum out in the crowd. It was impossible to discern her from the flurry of other women wearing the same color dress and hat. I continued my way aboard.

My room assignment was C-42, somewhere in the middle of the 3rd floor down. I went to find it right away, as I was already tired from dragging baggage around everywhere. I used the complimentary map given to me to find the room but became immensely distracted by the wonderous sights of the ship. Photos of it did not do it justice at all. It felt like royalty, it was absolutely stunning. Every single inch of it was worthy of conversation. The woodwork alone on some of the stairwells must have taken years to complete. This sudden exposure made me feel like a new person, like I had been reborn the moment I stepped foot onto the main deck. What else was life hiding from me was what I thought. It took another twenty minutes to traipse my way to the cabin.

The boat was already in motion, I could feel the sways and swirls as I tried to organize a few things in my state room. That's when I realized I could do that later, I would rather be on deck to see the ship as she gets further and further from port. I cleaned my teeth then went back up top.

Everyone else had the same idea, there were rows and rows of people trying to get a front view of the departure. I was still a kid at heart and looked for something to climb up on so I could see over everyone. After a few seconds of investigating, I saw that the ship had built-in iron ladders leading to the different decks. I climbed halfway up one to get a perfect view of the port as it got smaller and smaller the further we receded. You could still see hundreds of people rapidly waving miniature British flags in the air, wishing us a pleasant farewell. It was a brilliant and emotional sight.

Day one on this luxurious floating hotel, the ship stopped in France to pick up more passengers. I'd never been to France before, let alone any another country where everything you see in writing is in a different language that I have no way of translating. After leaving the port in Cherbourg, I continued my way around to see more of the amazing Titanic. I was becoming spoiled with delight from the classiness of it all. I met several people including a stewardess my age named Valencia. She was born in Spain, in a city in called Vigo but grew up in Sheffield England. I met her in the long chow line that led to a dinnertime buffet. We were both complaining about how the line wasn't moving fast enough and laughing about it. Isn't it amazing when you meet someone and know right away that you can tolerate them? She was that person, it's like our personalities were made from the same mold. We sat together and talked for a while until it was time for her to go to work. We became instant friends and planned to meet again the next day. I really did enjoy her company.

Valencia's impression of me was of an entitled little rich kid chasing a dream. I was definitely not rich, I worked plenty of hours and saved for months in order to pay for my ticket. I actually didn't know how much my father made at his business. I don't ever remember us not having the basic necessities growing up. Our house was normal, it wasn't a mansion. We didn't have servants, so no, we were not rich. We were humble suburbanites residing in the hills of Nunton in Salisbury. Valencia on the other hand was funny and sarcastic. She was smart as a whip as her insights gave me a thing or two to ponder.

Day two of the journey, the ship made a second stop in Ireland, I guess to pick up even more passengers and gather additional supplies. I met up with Valencia at high noon. I told her all about my board game and the plans I had in America. This was a side of me that she was happy to discover. She was supportive and couldn't wait to be one of the first to play the game. I hadn't thought about letting anyone aboard the ship play but felt it should be okay. I handed her the instructions to read at her own leisure. She laughed, then squinted her beady little eyes as she spoke,

"Addison, do you know how to play your own game? You need to get use to talking about it if you ever plan to sell it. Just explain the rules to me, I promise I won't fall asleep, I'll pay attention."

She was right, I was avoiding telling her how to play when I should be embracing the chance to spread the knowledge about the game. I went over the rules with her and even gave her a few hints. She was impressed by the content and simplicity of the description. I myself, was surprised by her reaction and learned that this was what it's like to get someone interested in something I created. I called the game Hero, a game of chance. Up to 6 people can play at a time. The game starts with the roll of the dice, you move your token around the different spaces on the board that corresponded with the number 0n the dice rolled. There were all kinds of pitfalls and fun tiles to land on including tiles that give you safety cards. But there is only one tile with the word Hero on it. If you are lucky enough to land there, a player other than you with the lowest amount of safety cards is eliminated. The last person left becomes the Hero and wins the game.

On day three, Valencia saw a group of kids and asked them if they wanted to play. I was reluctant because I wanted the set to stay in pristine condition for when It's presented to the possible buyers. But I also wondered how they would react to a new game. I allowed a few groups of 4 kids to play at a time. I'm not sure if it was the right decision, the game was still in its infancy and kids were quickly becoming addicted. They begged me to play again. It was interesting getting a pre-view of how the game might be accepted in America. It also made me feel good and accomplished that the kids were so eager to play. At dinner that night I thanked Val for talking me into sharing the game and for being a friend.

Day 5 of sailing the seas was almost the same as the previous two days, kids telling other kids about the game and hoping to get a chance to play. I was approached by a gentleman whose child demanded that he buy him a copy of the game. I explained to the father that it was not for sell. He angrily stated,

"Look here boy, everything can be bought at the right price!"

I then elaborated some of my own words,

"Excuse me sir, I am the owner of this game. I allowed the kids to play as a test market, this is the only copy anywhere and the test has been concluded."

He was pesky and persistent, he told me that I should rent it to him for a day instead. When I refused, things got a little ugly and we began arguing. I ended up storming away feeling insulted by a man I didn't even know. I decided it was time to pack the game up for good until I made it to the states. I told Val about the incident. She suggested we have the man arrested for harassment. I told her It wasn't necessary and that he was just a pretentious boob that thinks money can solve everything.

The incident put me in a foul mood, and I felt I could no longer go anywhere on the ship without hearing, "Hey, there's the man with that game". Everyone wanted to be the Hero, Ha! It was my fault for letting the cat out the bag. At the same time, I learned a lot about the game from watching them play. I needed to make a few minor changes to the rules, so I went back to my room and began to write.

I must have been tired from the day and had fallen asleep while writing. I awoke startled and disoriented, not knowing where I was at first. I could have sworn I heard a loud noise, but perhaps it was just part of a dream I was having. I got up, used the loo then prepared to officially go to bed. I could still smell the scent of rose water on my shirt from the hug that Val gave me before I came back to the cabin. As I was taking the shirt off, I began hearing frantic voices outside in the walkway. I put my ear against the door to try and make sense of the deliberately loud talking and -BAM BAM BAM BAM! "ADDISON, ARE YOU IN THERE?" I almost jumped out of my skin from the inconsiderate banging right on my eardrum. It was Valencia. I opened the door, she rushed in breathing heavy in an obvious panic.

"We have to get out of here! The boat is going to sink! Everyone is absolutely terrified, do you hear those screams, let's go let's go."

I was like, "Wait wait wait wait wait, what do you mean sinking?"

"They said the boat hit...uh uh, an ice mountain or, no no no an Iceberg! The boat hit an Iceberg!... tell me you didn't feel the jarring thump or hear the deafening sound of it!"

Val's glossy and dire eyes told me she wasn't fibbing. I stood there staring at her trying to process it all. It was too much to take in. My indecision to react prompted her to speak again,

"Take my hand and let's go, we can't get separated!"

I looked at the open palm of her trembling hand and instantly became addled. I grabbed the board game and all the money I brought, then left the room in a rush with Val. She was the only friend I had aboard this vessel.

Outside in the hallway was complete and utter madness. People were rushing toward the stairs. They were running over each other, trampling some of the ones who had fallen to the ground. I tried to help those that I could, but Val didn't miss a beat, she dragged me with unknown force up 3 staircases until we made it to the main deck starboard side.

I couldn't hear anything that was going on, there were too many people talking, screaming and yelling all at the same time. The first officer used a megaphone to settle everyone down and get their attention. He began to brief us.

"Folks, I need you to be calm and listen to me. We have about 2, maybe 3 hours before this ship sinks."

Those very words were all people needed to hear; panic broke out once again.

"Please Please Please, Quiet everyone, please! We do have protocol in cases of emergencies. Women and Children get on the lifeboats first. Thats just how it is."

After he said those words, everything else he said was just a blur, my heart sunk into my belly. Unless I found a safe way off this ship this was it! I was going down with it. There was no need to do the math when you knew how many total lifeboats there were. Val and I looked each other deep in the eyes with trepidation. I told her to go... I tried to undo my hand from hers, but she wouldn't let go. Tears flowed freely as she spoke,

"I'm not leaving you and you're not leaving me Addison! They don't have a choice, do they? NO, they don't have a choice. We are going to survive!"

She pulled herself into me and sobbed with her head to my chest. What was I going to do? The clock was ticking, she wanted me to stay with her until it was time for her to board one of the boats if she was lucky enough to get on one. How was I going to save myself? I needed to find something that floats but she wasn't letting me leave. She was convinced they wouldn't separate us.

An hour into this horrible situation, everyone was still in a frenzied process of evacuation. The Ship was beginning to tilt as the bow was now dipping below the surface of the ocean. This slanting made it hard for people to walk around and stay put. The near frozen water was slowly making its way up the deck. I watched as people sloshed through it as they ran wild to other parts of the boat. This was a genuine nightmare unfolding before me. How did we get into this situation? Who was responsible? My anger tried to deal with the reality of preparing for death.

The time had come, and Val was directed to one of the lifeboats. We were still strongly holding onto each other's hands. The commanding officer saw this and broke our hands apart.

"I'm Sorry, women and children first. He will have to wait."

Val Screamed, "NOOOOOO, I CAN'T LEAVE WITHOUT HIM! Please, you don't understand...We love each other, I bare his child, how will I provide for it alone."

I stopped in my tracks as I listened to the desperate lies the little bird was telling. She was being very protective of me. It was admirable but wasn't necessary. The commander looked at us both with fear in our eyes.

"I'm sorry, you can choose to stay onboard with him in hopes of getting a different lifeboat, but only after all the women and kids have boarded. I...I can't guarantee a thing...Next!"

I yanked my hand away from hers and insisted, "Val, listen to me, get on this boat, I will find you! I promise, you might not get another chance... Here sir, please take her."

The commander grabbed her arm and guided her into the boat. Her eyes never left me as she sobbed uncontrollably. The lifeboat was almost ready to be lowered into the water, there were just a few more spots left to fill. Thats when I saw an older woman consoling Val. She held Val's head to her bosom while caressing her long black hair. The lady began having words with the commander, she was giving him a good licking about the situation. I understood the captain's point of view, it made logical sense. I would have to do the same thing if I were in his shoes. Then the lady abruptly stood up and walked out the lifeboat. She got right into the commanders face and spoke loudly,

"How can you live with yourself, these two have a chance at love...I'm giving my seat to him, I will stay aboard with my two sons."

I began shaking my head at what was transpiring. I couldn't take her seat. My mind wouldn't allow it. The woman walked over to me, handed me her life vest, told me to put it on and go to Val. I told her that I could not do this. I must be a man and go down with the ship if I found no other way. She vehemently insisted, then walked in close to whisper in my ear,

"It's okay young fella, I will get on another boat, there are still more left to fill. I want to be with my sons, I should have stayed with them anyway. Maybe my choice is to die together with them if the lord sees it that way. Now take the seat, go on...GO!" She then turned to the captain and yelled to him while pointing at me, "I have given my seat to him, let him be with his young wife!"

The captain yelled to the commander and other officers, "This woman has given up her seat, she has lost priority!" He shook his head at her then told me to get in the boat.

What an unconscionable move on the brave woman's part. I accepted my right to the spot, "As the lord sees it" kept repeating in my head. Maybe I'm supposed to survive this. Maybe Val and I were supposed to be together. I put on the vest and was led onto the boat. Surprisingly I saw two other men on there as well. One of them was our guide, he looked inexperienced and just as scared as everyone else. The other man held onto a little girl who was virtually glued to him. Val began wailing even louder as we reunited.

The boat was lowered into the frigid waters of the North Atlantic. We urgently paddled away from the doomed ship. All we could do now was wait for more help and watch as the chaos ensued aboard the Titanic.

Blurred vision, static hearing, thoughts that made no sense. My mind was trapping itself inside itself. I learned that a traumatic experience like this is how one creates a multiple personality. It's a defense mechanism, a way to retreat and disappear into the colossal space of your mind so you don't have to feel the effects of a horrid experience. I didn't want any part of this tortuous scene, but I had to keep it together for Val and the others on the boat. We were not out of the woods yet and could meet a dark fate at any moment.

It was unbelievably mind-numbing watching the unsinkable succumb to the damage done to the bow. I will never forget that unbearable moment when I saw the Titanic break in half and take its final plunge as the stern was last to be swallowed by the hungry the sea. It was gone...It was gone...

Moments later, objects including people began to quickly surface. The sounds of arms flailing mad in the icy water was gut wrenching. I couldn't stand it! We were all helpless to do anything about it until we saw one lucky soul that was struggling just feet from us in the water. We did all we could to pulled him aboard and save him from imminent death. I could see other lifeboats doing the same to help others. After about 30 minutes everything was silent except for the faint whimpering sounds of distress. The passengers battle with the ocean had ceased. I began to pray out loud with strong conviction, all of our boat's occupants joined hands and encouraged me to continue.

Just a few hours before the sun greeted us on the distant horizon, we were saved by another ship. Warm clothes and hot soup made everyone feel privileged to be alive. We made it to our destination within a day or two, I can't recall the exact time. Val and I were able to get messages to our families, letting them know we survived. Depression became my newest mate and never left my side for months to come.

Val and I married 2 years later and had 3 beautiful children. The board game was destroyed in the transport and was not salvageable. It took 2 months, but I rebuilt it better than it was, making it more gender friendly. I renamed it Heros and Heroines. The Parker Brothers made me an offer but only if I agreed to work for them. After my experience on the Titanic, I no longer wanted to be a part of the gaming industry, so I declined the generous bid. I sold it outright to Milton Bradley, another gaming company in the states. I used the money from the sale to start the Cobalt manufacturing company, we mostly built and sold typewriters. A few years later I collaborated with George Westinghouse and together we created a new line of electronic products.

In 1926 we settled our lives in Syracuse, NY. Val became very religious and taught our kids the importance prayer and appreciation. Every year on April 15 we make our way to the Atlantic. I would begin to smell the ocean breeze well before anyone one else. That distinctive scent will forever be attached to a memory never too far from my thoughts.

Once we arrive, we cast out flower wreaths into the waters. We say a prayer for all who lost their lives and a special prayer to the unknown woman who perhaps gave her life so I could live. She will always be my Hero.